CHAPTER 73

“Oh dear, Mother. I told you not to do this.”

The uncle put his arm around the grandmother’s shoulder to support her as she struggled to stand upright.

Watching the two, Taejun realized that he was not the only one who had been unable to have a ‘proper ending’ in life.

The grandmother’s words, that it was all her fault, were something she had been telling herself since.

Taejun didn’t know what to do and looked back at Minhee. Minhee, with reddened eyes and trembling lips, stared at the grandmother, then nodded several times at Taejun, as if conveying something without words. Taejun understood what she was trying to say. He took a few more steps and stood in front of the grandmother.

“My heart is torn thinking about the time I sent Yoojin away when she came to our house. It breaks my heart. I didn’t know that would be the last time I’d see my child…When I looked out the window, there you were, sitting in front of the door and I felt so bad. The clothes I bought for her 10 years ago had faded, yet she was still wearing them. If only I hadn’t sent her away so hurtfully that day…this wouldn’t have happened.”

As his grandmother sobbed, his uncle handed her a handkerchief and spoke gruffly in a tightly constrained voice.

“Mother, you were confined in your room and couldn’t go out.”

“But how can that be an excuse for not taking care of my child? I should have gone out and met Yoojin, even if it meant going against Ho-jin’s father. If I had known she was going to America…”

“Yoojin was also very stubborn, just like father.”

“Ho-jin’s father loved Yoojin so much, too much, that he couldn’t let her go until the end. She went to a man she loved and had two children with him, but he wanted to bring her back… That smart man was so persistent about Yoojin’s matters. As soon as he heard the news that Yoojin had died in America, he went there. I wonder what kind of reproach he expected to hear.”

The grandmother reached out her trembling hand to Taejun, her wrinkled and bony hand being awkwardly enveloped by Taejun’s large one.

“My child, I’m sorry. I’m the one at fault. As a mother, I could have done so much for my daughter, but I didn’t. That’s why Yoojin left us so early. Taejun, my grandson, Grandma is sorry…”

The grandmother bowed her head over their clasped hands.  Taejun, looking down at the white-haired old woman nearing ninety, lowered himself to one knee. In a voice heavy with sorrow, he spoke as if pouring out his heart.

“What happened to ……Mother……. was an accident.”

Taejun’s maternal grandmother looked up.

“It was just bad luck. It wasn’t anyone’s fault… Grandma.”

Her trembling fingers brushed against Taejun’s forehead as she wept again.

“Oh dear, how did you get hurt like this? Did it hurt a lot? Did you have a hard time growing up? My dear grandson, you must have had a tough time growing up without parents. How can I ever make up for those years?”

“……It’s alright, now.”

“I’ve never done anything for you as my grandchild. Thank you for coming to see me. Taemin said he would come to Busan with my great-grandchildren when he has his second child. I should have gone to them instead of waiting, and now I’ve lost my grandchild like this…”

“Oh, Mother. Please stop. You’re going to collapse at this rate. How can you endure a 14-hour flight in your condition? Is there something urgent you need to do in America? Taejun, you stand up too.”

The uncle pulled Taejun to his feet and gestured to the sofa next to the wheelchair. The grandmother motioned to the uncle.

“Ho-jin, go get the documents for Yoojin. You know where they are, right?”

The uncle nodded and went into the room across the living room.

“Santon……?”

Rose’s trembling voice called to Taejun. Taejun, who had momentarily forgotten she was there, turned in surprise and looked in the direction of the sound. Minhee and Rose were now sitting side by side on the sofa across from him. Minhee had her head bowed, rubbing her eyes, and Rose, glancing at her, let out a wail.

“Miss Minhee crying! Great-grandma crying! Rose crying too!”

The reddened-eyed Minhee looked up, tears still in her eyes.

“Rose, Miss Minnie isn’t crying. I just got some dust in my eyes, so my eyes are a little watery. Come here, Rose. Blow the dust out of my eyes.”

Minhee opened her arms, and Rose ran into her embrace, crying. With a tear-stained face, Rose puffed out her cheeks and blew air at Minhee’s face, spraying more saliva than actual air. Minhee blinked for a moment, then smiled through her tears and hugged Rose tightly.

“The dust is all gone now. Thank you, Rose.”

“You’re welcome.”

Sniffling, Rose turned her head and looked towards the grandmother.

“Great-grandma too, blow?”

“Yes, yes. Our little Rose, can you blow for great-grandma too?”

Her great-grandmother, wiping her face with the handkerchief, reached out her arms to Rose. Rose quickly ran over and blew air on the grandmother’s face a couple of times.

“Is Great-Grandma okay now?”

“Yes, yes, my dear. Now that our little Rose has blown on me, I’m all better. Thank you.”

At that moment, the uncle came out of the room with a yellow envelope in his hand and sat down next to Taejun. Minhee, keeping an eye on the situation, carefully approached Rose and took her hand.

“While the adults are talking, would you like to come sit with me over there?”

“Miss Minhee, Rose is bored.”

“…Ah, are you bored?”

“Uhm, teacher. At the end of the hallway, there’s a piano that Yoojin, Taejun’s mom, used to play. There are also some toys the grandchildren used to play with-“

The uncle gestured towards the hallway.

“Ah, yes! Thank you.”

Even before the uncle finished speaking, Minhee quickly responded in a low voice, whispering something to Rose. Rose nodded, and Minhee took the child’s hand and walked towards the hallway. As she walked, Minhee briefly made eye contact with Taejun. Her gaze held an unspoken question, ‘Will you be alright?’

Taejun gave a short nod.

Today, Minhee hovered around Taejun like a mother bird, quietly keeping him company. Taejun, who had been surviving on his own since he was 13, found it both amusing and bittersweet that this younger, more tender-hearted woman was worried about leaving him alone.

Today, her presence by his side was a small, warm focal point that he could reach out and feel the warmth of. She was the counterweight that helped him maintain his balance, in the dark, deep depths.

An uneasiness that had been brewing in the dark, deep recesses of his mind suddenly rose to the surface and washed over him like a wave. Like the smell that lingered in the house the day his father died.

‘Is this really okay?’

“Miss Minhee seems like a very good person. It must have been hard for you to take care of a young child on your own.” 

His uncle mumbled, watching Minhee and Rose disappear into the room.

“…Yes. She has been a great help.”

Now, he couldn’t confidently say who needed her more, Rose or himself.

“She’s so pretty, and her Korean is so soft and lovely. The more I see her, the more endearing she is.”

“…”

“Ho-jin, hand over the deed to the house left in Yoojin’s name to Taejun.”

The grandmother prompted the uncle.

“Taejun, take them. They’re yours now.”

Taking the file hesitantly, Taejun looked back and forth between his maternal grandmother and uncle in confusion.

“There’s an apartment in Haeundae and a small building on Dalmaji Hill. They were registered under Yoojin’s name.”

“I can’t accept—”

“Taejun, when an adult gives you something, you just say ‘Thank you’ and take it. Understand?”

Taejun hesitated at the uncle’s words, which he had heard before.

“…Thank you. But—”

The grandmother cut him off.

“Put the building on Dalmaji Hill in Rose’s name and the apartment in your name, Taejun. It’s comforting to have a place of your own to come and go freely, unlike staying in a hotel.”

“Grandma—”

“Taejun, I’ve lived not knowing where or how you grew up, whether you were alive or dead. I don’t know how much longer I have to live. I can’t turn back time, but I need to do what I can for you. It’s my way of atoning, even just a little before I leave. This is your grandmother making sure you’re taken care of.”

The uncle chimed in.

“Taejun, you’re not the only one who received this. Sung-eun and Sung-tae also got it.”

“Taejun, this is for… your mother, Yoojin. Take it.”

Taejun, conflicted, looked between his grandmother and uncle before finally lowering his head.

“…Yes, Grandmother. Thank you.”

Standing by the door where the sound of the piano emanated, Taejun paused to listen. Minhee seemed to be playing the piano, and Rose was singing along.

Seeing his grandmother’s tearful regret had stirred deep emotions within him, emotions that had bubbled up to his throat, threatening to spill out. He swallowed the large lump that seemed stuck in his throat, feeling a dull ache in his chest. Taking a deep breath, he lifted his head and straightened his shoulders. They felt lighter than before he had arrived.

He lightly knocked on the door and opened it without waiting for a response. Minhee and Rose were sitting side by side at his mother’s old piano. The music stopped abruptly as Minhee turned to look at him.

Taejun read the worry, joy, and warmth he couldn’t quite define in her reddened eyes, and he opened his arms to her. It was an action not born of thought, and so Taejun was slightly surprised by his own behavior. But without hesitation, he rushed over and enveloped Minhee, who had run into his embrace, in a crushing hug.