Chapter 2 Part 1 – A Changed Honeymoon

With a loud thud, Ruby’s eyes flew open. She woke up abruptly due to the noisy sound, but everything around her was quiet. Even the ceiling that came into her view was eerily familiar.

This was the ceiling she had seen until just before moving to Grit Manor in the capital for the divorce.

But why was she seeing this ceiling now? She was no longer a member of Grit Manor after the divorce. Besides, the current Marie would not have been very welcoming to the daughter-in-law who had divorced her son so easily.

Surely they had already signed and said their goodbyes…

At that thought, Ruby suddenly sat up.

She placed her hand on her body and started to feel herself up.

She recalled the feeling from not long ago when she had been knocked down by a broken carriage after getting out of the coach. She recalled trying to dodge the rushing carriage as her life flashed before her eyes. She had felt a stifling sensation and had forced herself to take deep breaths.

The accident had surely happened, this vivid memory couldn’t be false.

“Are you awake? Oh my, are you alright?” A concerned chambermaid rushed in.

“I will call the court physician!”

Worried about her trembling breath and the sight of Ruby’s state, the chambermaid hurriedly left the room.

“It appears to be stress. You seem to have had a lot on your mind,” said the court physician, who was also a regular visitor to Grit estate.

Ruby sat on the edge of the bed, leaning back on the headboard, with the assistance of the court physician.

It was strange seeing the court physician here as she had seen him only in Grit Estate.

Ruby couldn’t tear her gaze away from the court physician as he made notes about her condition.

“Such symptoms are common among newlyweds during the early days of their marriage.”

“Newlyweds?”

“Well, when you experience a sudden change in your environment, it takes some time to adjust. It would be best for you to relax and find stability. I will convey this to the Lady.”

The court physician made sure to recommend a diet to the chambermaid before leaving the room.

Ruby contemplated his words. Early days of marriage? Her three-year marriage was considered part of the early days?

“Why would I be so fragile?” Ruby muttered.

The court physician had left the room when Marie’s voice reached her ears.

“…Do you have to make such a fuss about it? People might think I made you suffer. I’m embarrassed.”

“…?”

“Do you have to be so obvious?”

Mary scolded Ruby as she had done many times before. As she watched Marie behave differently than usual. 

Ruby watched her more closely than usual and was lost in thought. While Marie scolded her, she could tell that Marie had a worried look on her face.

“Anyway, you should rest today.”

Mary had more to say, but her unusual behavior was unsettling Ruby.

“What are you doing? Making a scene after living together for so long,” Marie murmured loudly before leaving the room.

The room fell silent after Mary left. Ruby and the chambermaid both refrained from speaking.

“Shall I bring you some mild soup?”

Unable to bear the silence, the chambermaid tried to leave the room to fetch something.

“Please…”

Ruby managed to let out a word before the chambermaid left the room.

“How long have I been here?”

“Your ladyship?”

“Yes.”

“About six months.”

“…Then how long have I been married?”

“Married, my lady?”

“Yes.”

The maid raised her eyebrows at the strange question. Ruby was looking for a sincere answer.

“It’s been about a year. Not too long ago, the Dowager threw a party for your wedding anniversary, remember?”

“Oh.”

Ruby mumbled about the wedding anniversary party.

“That day, I broke a glass, didn’t I?”

“Yes, that’s right. You were quite nervous.”

“…Thank you.”

“Then I’ll bring the soup.”

The maid thought Ruby must be under a lot of stress. Given what the master was doing to the mistress, it wasn’t hard to understand.

“Oh my…”

Once the maid left, Ruby muttered to herself. It seemed like she had returned to her first year of marriage.

***
Ruby ate the soup brought by the maid and took the medicine prescribed by the doctor, and she slept deeply. When she woke up the next day, she was still a bit groggy. 

The same was true the following day and the day after that. It wasn’t until the day after that she finally accepted the fact that she had returned to herself.

“My Lady…”

The servant who called Ruby near the door was the first one she had met when she opened her eyes. It seemed she didn’t hear the knocking due to being lost in thought.

“The Dowager…”

The servant hesitated and glanced around, and Ruby understood what she wanted to say. Even though Ruby had done nothing but sleep for a few days, she had been remarkably patient as a maid. 

This was partly because the doctor had directly told her that she needed to rest due to her illness. Furthermore, it had only been a year since their marriage, so it wasn’t the time for the Dowager to constantly reprimand Ruby. It was a time when she subtly criticized her, attributing any mistakes to her and eroding her self-esteem.

“I should get up. Will you help me with putting on the dress?”

“Yes!”

It seemed like the reason Marie hadn’t come to the room yet was because of this child.

“I’m sorry, I’ve been giving you a hard time”

“It’s nothing, My Lady.”

Come to think of it, it seemed like this child wasn’t here in her third year of marriage. Although the face was familiar, Ruby didn’t remember much about the child. The last maid who served Ruby seemed a bit older. Compared to her, the current maid was much younger.

“What’s your name?”

“Dominic.”

She tried to remember the name, but there was nothing she could recall. After all, during this period, she was too busy taking care of Eli.

“Not just during this time…”

She hadn’t changed until the end of her married life.

“Hmm?”

“No, I’ll remember your name. Thank you, Dominic.”

“Your Welcome My Lady!”

Ruby smiled softly, appreciating her prompt and confident response.

***

“It was hard to see your face in the past few days”

Marie’s first words surprised Ruby. Even though she had heard from the doctor, she didn’t expect this reaction. It was quite impressive.

“I’m afraid I’m going to make a mistake by resting sloppily.”

“What?”

“I’m still learning, and I’m already lacking. So, I thought you might be worried. It seems I was too short-sighted.”

“…You could have just told me.”

Marie, who had been preparing to scold, was at a loss for words. It wasn’t an excuse, and she wasn’t insisting that she hadn’t made a mistake. There was no specific fault to point out, so it had to be let go.

Receiving an apology felt strange. 

Dealing with Marie was not as difficult as it used to be. During her marriage, Ruby tried to win Marie’s heart, even though she was in pain and held on foolishly. She prioritized the Grit Household more than herself, all to gain a tiny corner of Marie’s heart.

“We’re going to have a tea party.”

But it was all in vain. No matter how hard she tried, Ruby felt inadequate and unworthy in Marie’s eyes.

So Ruby had no intention of putting her best effort into her marriage in the future.

“The daughter of Viscount Zemer will be there. Probably, all the ladies who attended the party that day will come.”

Lost in thought, Ruby gazed downward and listened quietly. She seemed to be aware of her mistakes.

“You’ve made mistakes in the last party, so think carefully about how you’ll win the hearts of those people and prepare.”

However, there was no response after that.

Ruby continued to hold her spoon, lost in thought while attempting to scoop the soup. Marie furrowed her brow, feeling as if Ruby was showing a lack of manners.

“Are you listening?”

Marie’s voice had become sharper than before.

“Sorry… What did you say?”

Her immediate apology and questioning were the typical Ruby, Marie had seen while living together in Grit Estate.

“I said that I’m thinking of hosting a tea party and inviting the people who came to your first-anniversary celebration a while ago.”

“Oh…”

Once again, she blinked and looked at herself without giving any clear answer.

She seemed to look slightly different.

Did she lose weight due to being unwell?

No, that wasn’t it. Marie dismissed the thought. Ruby often didn’t understand what she was saying because she hadn’t properly learned. Right. That seemed more credible.

“So, I think… It’s probably going to be difficult for me.”

“People… what?”

“Anyway, I’ll probably just make mistakes if I attend. It might be better not to go to the party.”

It was Marie’s persuasion like this that led Ruby to host the tea party. She prepared the most fashionable tea and desserts to please their hearts and even prepared tea party commemorative gifts. She gave them to all the participants.

She thought the party atmosphere wasn’t bad.

At least at this time, they were all encouraging on the outside, and it was a time when they exchanged words of comfort that everyone makes mistakes at first. And the innocent Ruby believed those words.

It wasn’t until they discovered that the participants of the tea party had thrown their commemorative gifts into the trash bin at the entrance of the mansion that Ruby realized it.

She had hidden them somewhere because she was afraid to ask the maid or dispose of them in her room, thinking they might catch Marie’s ear. She couldn’t quite remember what she did with them afterward.

It was a life that wouldn’t change, with people who wouldn’t change. None in the Grit household family cared about her. Eli was no different. The noble guests who followed the Grit family were the same.

Was there any meaning in continuing this marriage? Ruby no longer wanted to endure Eli’s indifference or Dowager’s disdain. No, she had no intention of enduring it

So the conclusion was clear.

To break free from the watchful, suffocating life.

“And I think I need to go to the capital for something.”

“Suddenly? You…”

The words questioning her sanity almost slipped out, but Marie restrained herself to maintain decorum.

“Yes, I’ve decided to meet with him there.”

In the previous life, she had endured and endured until she impulsively, reluctantly got a divorce. This time, she planned to bring it forward a bit.

Ruby bid her goodbye to Marie, who was taken aback by the sudden announcement, with a smile she had been taught.

“Was that really sister Ruby?”

Eve was stunned as she watched Ruby go up to her room.

“Could her head be messed up because of the illness?”

Emily mumbled from the side. Her tone was relatively calm, but her expression was not much different from Eve’s.

Even though they saw it right before their eyes, they couldn’t believe it.

“If you’ve finished eating, go inside and rest.”

Marie’s calm voice contained her discomfort. Both of them quickly left as soon as they noticed it.

After Eve and Emily had disappeared, Marie let go of the composed expression she had been trying to maintain and stared in the direction where Ruby had vanished with a perplexed look.

***

As soon as Ruby returned to her room, she sat down and wrote a letter to Eli.

The content was simple.

A request for a divorce and a request to go to the Marquis of Grit’s mansion in the capital. She also added a note suggesting that it would be a good idea to expedite the divorce by contacting the Empress on the way.

As she was happily finishing the letter, someone knocked on her door.

“Come in.”

It was a servant delivering the letter.

 “Oh, you came at just the right time. I was about to call you,” Ruby remarked.

She had been planning to call him to deliver the letter.

“I want you to send this letter. Can it reach its destination as quickly as possible?” 

“Yes, I will send it by the fastest courier.”

“Thank you.”

“Here, a letter has arrived for you, My Lady”

“A letter?”

She hadn’t received a letter from anyone, especially during this time when she was avoiding contact with everyone. After the servant took the letter Ruby intended to send, he handed her the one that had just arrived.

“Oh my.”

Ruby smiled brightly as she received the letter.

It was a letter from Lynn, accompanied by a small card that served as a wedding invitation. “Lynn got married during this time,” Ruby realized once again that she had returned. She had somewhat vague memories of receiving a wedding invitation during her busy and disconnected period.

Lynn had been the only friend who had attended her wedding with Eli and had worried about her lonely married life. Ruby had always felt sorry for receiving Lynn’s kindness.

“Looks like I have another reason to go to the capital.” Ruby smiled brightly once again.

***

“What’s this?” Marie asked when she saw Ruby’s luggage.

“Are you really leaving like this? I wonder how one can learn such absurd things. I didn’t know you hadn’t received an education to this extent,” She muttered, 

Even though the expression “muttered” was ironic. She mumbled as if talking to herself, but her voice was loud enough for people nearby to hear.  How much pain had those words caused?

“Yeah. You don’t like it when I’m around because I’m uneducated, so I’m moving out of the capital. Ruby said, repeating what she had often told Marie.

“What have you learned? How can you not know anything? What should I do with you? It annoys me because of you.” With these words, the self-taught writer and herself were constantly belittled.

“You…!”

“If you’ll excuse me, I don’t want to be late.”

As soon as her luggage was loaded, Ruby got into the carriage without listening to the rest of Marie’s words. 

As the carriage departed, Ruby looked through the window at the Grit’s mansion. It felt like it might truly be the last time. Despite the fact that it was a place with memories of tormentors and being tormented, she still felt reluctant to leave.

Only now did she realize how pitiful she must have seemed.

With a content heart, Ruby smiled and took in every detail of the Grit’s mansion. It was truly the end. In front of it, there was still Marie with her bewildered expression, and even Eve and Emily.