Under the white cloth lay a crumpled piece of paper and a handkerchief.

“……”

With a blank face, I reached out and picked up the white paper first.

The familiar texture of the paper and its contents.

This was the reply I had sent to Ainberg not long ago.

<To Your Majesty the Emperor,

My heart felt empty because you left without a farewell or greeting, but your affectionate letter made even the slightest lingering disappointment melt away like snow.

How could I dare to understand the burden and weight placed on Your Majesty’s shoulders? I only care about Your Majesty’s well-being, so I simply hope and pray for your safe return.

While Your Majesty has been away, I’ve made a new friend.

You must have seen her at the recent banquet, Lord Foil Viper’s daughter. Miss Viper is young but bold and clever, and we get along well.

When you return from Sutton, please keep your promise to me.

I have many things I wish to ask Your Majesty. I believe you feel similarly.

I end this letter saying I will always wait for Your Majesty here.

Please return safely and soundly.>

“……”

I put so much thought and care into writing this letter.

I wanted it to be straightforward like his letters to me, yet not appear too cold.

I wrote each character with firm pressure, constantly trying to calm my emotions as old feelings kept surfacing despite my efforts to stay focused.

It felt like a battle between the part of me that disliked Ainberg and another self that needed to be clingy.

‘Why would he carry this letter around?’

I grumbled to myself as I neatly folded the letter again and placed it back on the table.

Next to it was a handkerchief stained with blood.

I was about to cover it again with the white cloth, reluctant to touch it because of the dark red marks.

“……”

The gold embroidery on the corner of the handkerchief.

Though partially hidden by bloodstains, those were clearly Ainberg’s initials.

“This.”

I picked up the handkerchief as if entranced.

“Why is this here?”

This handkerchief was one I had embroidered and given to Ainberg during my time as empress.

Looking at this messy, crooked embroidery, there’s no doubt.

No one in the imperial palace would embroider this terribly!

“Why do you have this?”

I remembered clearly when I gave him this handkerchief.

Back then, I still felt sorry for Ainberg and wanted to reach his heart. I wanted to be a small comfort to him and hoped he would find some happiness through me.

Of course, my former father’s relentless pressure played a part, but I genuinely wanted to get closer to Ainberg as a person.

With that in mind, I worked hard to learn embroidery, something I didn’t know how to do.

The problem was that no matter how much I practiced, my skills didn’t improve because I was so untalented.

Nevertheless, I stayed up all night embroidering, pricking my fingertips multiple times with the needle, to make this gift.

‘Are you telling me to use this rag?’

…That’s exactly what he said before tossing it to a nearby maid.

Yes, the embroidery was terrible, but the handkerchief itself was top quality!

And so was my sincerity!

The humiliation of that day is still vivid.

‘Why is this here?’

Why do you have it?

After calling it a rag and giving it to a maid, why is this here?

I almost shook the sleeping Ainberg awake.

To calm my turbulent emotions, I got up from my seat and slowly walked around the empty room.

“Hoo……”

For some reason, I felt heat rising in my body. As I pressed the back of my hand against my hot cheeks, my gaze wandered again.

Yet the source of all these emotions lay sleeping peacefully, infuriatingly so.

As if he had nothing to do with any of this.

“Everything… everything is because of you.”

I looked down again at the handkerchief in my hand.

Yes, it might not be Ainberg’s possession!

He clearly threw it away to the maid in front of me, and it’s hard to imagine him secretly taking it back.

No, it’s not just hard to imagine—it’s absolutely impossible.

The person I needed to ask showed no signs of waking up, and I was tormented by my inability to resolve this confusion.

“Ah! Could that child have gone to Sutton?”

I clapped my hands together and forced a smile.

“So perhaps there was a situation where she happened to give the handkerchief to the Emperor, and by another coincidence… the Emperor got hold of it?”

After pacing around the room with the handkerchief in my hand, I approached Ainberg again and flopped down in the chair.

He was still sleeping without the slightest movement.

I stared at him blankly before carefully resting my chin on his shoulder.

“When will you wake up… and answer me?”

His pale complexion and firmly closed lips.

The sharp smell of disinfectant still lingering throughout the bedroom and the heavy, damp air.

For some reason, I felt like crying and became melancholic.

“I keep having more questions for you, but I don’t even know how to ask them all.”

I fiddled with the handkerchief between my fingers and thought of my cat, Miamo.

“…I didn’t know you liked cats. Well, I don’t know what you like or dislike at all. I couldn’t know, and you never gave me the chance to find out.”

“……”

“But this is really strange. Why did you take my cat? If you didn’t like me, why did you care about the cat I was raising?”

How can you make someone this uncomfortable and still lie there so peacefully?

…Well, that’s not something to say to an injured person, but still.

While I was lost in these thoughts, feeling quite down.

Knock knock.

Someone knocked on the bedroom door, followed by careful footsteps.

It was Oz, walking in with a haggard face.

He glanced once in the direction where Ainberg lay and let out a short breath.

“His Majesty is still the same, I see.”

He muttered as if to himself, then turned to look at me.

“My lady, it’s getting late. You should return to your room now. When you go upstairs, I’ll call for the bedroom attendants and the doctor.”

“Mr. Aide.”

“Sir Chadmon and the Duke are very worried.”

But none of those words registered with me at all.

“I have something to ask you.”

“Yes, my lady. Please speak.”

I reached toward the table beside the bed and said:

“What you left earlier, this handkerchief. Is it really His Majesty’s?”

After asking the question, I wasn’t even sure what answer I was waiting for.

I didn’t want to hear either a yes or a no.

I just wanted all this confusion to end quickly somehow.

“Everything placed there is indeed His Majesty’s personal belongings.”

“……”

Oz must have read my subtle change in expression and carefully asked:

“Is there a problem?”

“No, that’s not it.”

I had impulsively asked out of curiosity, but unless he was directly involved, Oz wouldn’t know the full story.

Moreover, it was unclear how or what I should ask.

After flailing my arms in the air, I spoke to Oz in a “whatever” manner:

“I, I saw the embroidery and it’s a mess. Not even a signature, but the initials are so crooked.”

I continued speaking while clearing my throat repeatedly.

“H-how could His Majesty use a handkerchief with such a terrible design?”

What am I saying? This is crazy.

“Ah.”

Then Oz answered with an awkward smile.

“I don’t know much about design or embroidery, but…”

“……”

“I’m certain it’s an item His Majesty cherishes greatly.”

I blinked my eyes wide, thinking I had misheard.

“This?”

“Yes, he always carries it with him.”

“But why would he…”

“Perhaps because it’s important to His Majesty.”

After Oz left, I sat limply again, keeping watch by Ainberg’s side.

Is “keeping watch” the right expression? No, perhaps it would be more accurate to say I remained seated because I lacked the energy to stand up.

I had thought I didn’t care whether you lived or died.

Just like when you cruelly ignored me while my body lay collapsed, I had decided to treat you the same way.

…Though I hadn’t planned to take revenge or torment you until death.

At the very least, I had promised myself I would throw some mockery your way when you were sick or struggling.

That’s fair, isn’t it?

Compared to what I’ve been through, isn’t this a trivial and human form of non-revenge?

But now, looking at you lying there, I can’t bring myself to laugh or even sneer.

Looking at the man in deep sleep, I sighed.

“…What was your true heart?”

If you keep doing this, it makes me wonder if perhaps you pushed me away forcefully.

But that’s not it, is it?

“So wake up soon and tell me it’s not true.”

Please wake up and tell me to stop these absurd thoughts.

“Even though you didn’t like me. If it was pity, just tell me so.”

I dropped my head onto Ainberg’s bed.

“Don’t run away so irresponsibly…”

I didn’t want to show my disheveled, broken face to anyone, including myself.