Chapter 107

Catherine was confused by the unfamiliar demeanor of the Duke. Just moments ago, he had been lecturing her with a disapproving expression. He claimed to have come to deliver Stella’s diary, but then suddenly knelt and greeted her. Catherine could only look at him with suspicion, wondering what his intentions were.

The Duke, who had been bowing his head for a long time as if waiting for Catherine’s response, slowly raised his head. Catherine found it difficult to meet his gaze directly. Facing the Duke’s eyes was still a daunting task for her.

“From this moment on, the person before me is solely Her Majesty the Queen.”

He meant he would not treat her as his granddaughter. The Duke’s declaration, filled with respect and distance, made Catherine finally turn her gaze back to him cautiously. The inscrutable eyes of her grandfather made her tremble for a moment.

So what was she supposed to say in return? As the Queen, the only person she should respect and honor was her husband, Henry. By strict law and order, she should speak informally to her grandfather, the Duke. She knew this in theory, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it, so she stood there, unable to do anything, just watching the Duke.

“Please stand up.”

Catherine thought she should at least help the Duke stand. Looking down at her grandfather, whom she had always looked up to, was not a pleasant feeling. She had thought that if she became someone he couldn’t ignore and gained his recognition, she would feel very pleased. But contrary to her expectations, something inside her felt very uncomfortable.

As he stood and looked up, the Duke’s actions and expressions were filled with respect for Catherine. To assert respect is, in other words, to create distance. A new kind of distance had settled between her and her grandfather. Only then did Catherine vaguely realize why her grandfather’s respectful demeanor made her uncomfortable.

She wanted to be acknowledged as family by her grandfather.

She didn’t want to become someone higher than the Duke to look down on him, but simply to be a loving and embracing family.

“Please forgive my rudeness in coming unannounced to convey a message.”

“Please, don’t say that.”

Perhaps they had come too far to become such a ‘family’ with the Duke. Maybe she had dreamed of something impossible from the start. It was a thought that crossed Catherine’s mind as she looked at the Duke, who felt more distant than ever.

“Although it is late, I wish to tell you a humorous story, Your Majesty.”

A humorous story out of nowhere. It would be nice to enter the Duke’s mind just once. If she could fully understand his intentions, she would have no regrets. Catherine neither accepted nor refused, simply waiting for the Duke to speak.

“There was once a boy.”

Perhaps taking Catherine’s silence as consent, the Duke began his tale. It was indeed late for a trivial story, but Catherine didn’t want to interrupt him.

“The boy’s parents were poor and always felt sorry for not being able to feed him well.”

“Please sit down.”

Thinking the story might be long, Catherine suggested the Duke take a seat. The Duke, too, seemed to think it inappropriate to chat while standing and accepted her offer.

“So the boy’s parents chose a way to provide him with abundant food and a wealthy life.”

It would be nice to have some warm tea.

Catherine glanced at the teapot on the table as she sat facing the Duke. The attendants had probably left tea in it, but it was surely cold by now.

“They sent him to be adopted by another prestigious family. It was called adoption, but it was like selling their son for daily bread and a few silver coins.”

Should I ring the bell? 

Catherine pondered whether to ring for the attendants to bring fresh tea.

“The boy, sold off, struggled at first, waiting for his parents. But as days passed without their arrival, he resented them and vowed to erase them from his heart. Perhaps it was then that he decided to become someone so high that his abandoning parents would regret it.”

It seemed familiar somehow. Catherine tapped the teapot with her finger.

“As time passed, the boy’s relentless efforts earned him recognition from his adoptive parents. Fortunately, they were good people. They were noble, from a prestigious family, fundamentally different from those who sold their son for a few coins.”

“…….”

“So the boy worked even harder. He pushed others aside and trampled them to get what he wanted without hesitation. The more he did so, the easier it became to achieve his desires. The boy grew up to stand tall in a position admired by all.”

“…….”

“But then the boy made a fatal mistake.”

“A fatal mistake, you say…?”

Catherine found herself drawn into the Duke’s story. The familiar tale broke down her defenses.

“He thought status, honor, and power were the most important things in the world. He considered money and honor far more important than friends or family, and he viewed family as mere means to achieve what he wanted. He didn’t realize how foolish this was and repeated his mistakes over and over. He married without love for a strong backing, and tried to use his daughter, born from a political marriage, as a bargaining tool. He kept making mistakes, one after another….”

“…….”

“Then, for the first time, his reckless actions were checked. His daughter ran away from him.”

“…Could it be, that boy is….”

“At first, he was simply indignant. He thought she would gratefully accept the good match he had found for her, but he couldn’t understand how she ran away with a man of poor origin and no possessions. So he sent people to find her and bring her back. He repeated this without realizing it was driving her to the brink of death.”

Catherine had to withdraw her hand, which had been fiddling with the teacup. She had a vague idea of whose story the Duke was telling.

“The boy lost his daughter. Even when he saw her return as a cold corpse, he was busy cursing her foolishness in his heart. He believed, or wanted to believe, that her death was not his fault.”

The Duke was confessing his life story. He was, for the first time, revealing to Catherine why he lived and acted as he did. Catherine, who had earlier thought it would be nice to enter the Duke’s mind, found herself at a loss upon hearing his inner thoughts. She couldn’t nod in agreement or tell him to stop. All she could do was nervously glance around and clasp her trembling hands.

“The boy had no family. The granddaughter left behind by his daughter was his only blood relative, but she meant little to him.”

Finally, Catherine appeared in the Duke’s life story. She couldn’t understand why he was prefacing such a long story with what he wanted to say to her.

“So he pushed his granddaughter just as he had pushed his daughter. Instead of warm words, he gave her cold and harsh scoldings, and instead of gentle touches, he dealt out merciless slaps.”

“…….”

“He thought it would work. Just as he had driven himself to achieve his desires, he thought it would work for his children too. He couldn’t accept that moving others to his will was nearly impossible. Admitting that felt like admitting defeat.”

“Grandfather….”

Why was he suddenly justifying his actions? 

Catherine was bewildered by hearing the Duke’s inner confession for the first time. More than that, she didn’t want to understand the *buse disguised as education that the Duke had inflicted on her with mere words. Afraid that listening further would force her to understand him, she hastily tried to stop the Duke. She implied that he should stop, but the Duke continued.

“In the end, the granddaughter left him too, like his daughter. She even cursed him, saying she would never see his face again in life. He still can’t forget the look on her face. The anger, hatred, disgust, and even sadness and despair on her face followed him for a long time. He saw it whether he closed his eyes or opened them. It was truly hellish days.”

So that was it. 

Catherine, who had thought her words would have no impact on the Duke, had cursed him with all her might. She wanted him to feel heartache from seeing her miserable state, to grieve over losing his granddaughter. Though she had cursed with that intention, she vaguely thought it wouldn’t be enough to shake her grandfather.

But she was wrong. The Duke was more hurt and pained than she had imagined. He just hadn’t realized it himself.

“I thought I could forget about the granddaughter who left me by gaining a new child. So in my old age, I brought a young wife into the house and threw a party to show off to my granddaughter. In hindsight, it was a childish act. Not something a person with the title of Duke should do.”

The Duke admitted it was his story. With a self-deprecating smile, he criticized himself and carefully looked at Catherine’s hand on the table. Catherine, observing the Duke’s expression, thought he seemed to want to hold her hand.