Chapter 31

Whenever Serenia started to cry, Lucien continuously kissed her eyes and cheeks. By the time there was no part of her face that hadn’t felt Lucien’s lips, Serenia finally stopped sobbing, panting as she gazed steadily at him.

“Did you really think it was me?”

“Of course. I could never mistake your silhouette.”

And her scent, too. If she’d worn a loose dress, maybe he would have been confused, but this tight, scandalous dress showed off Serenia’s silhouette exactly as Lucien remembered. When Lucien slipped his finger between the slit of her skirt up to her thigh, Serenia smacked the back of his hand.

“Is this really the time for that?”

“For me, as long as you’re here, I’m always in the mood—no matter where we are.”

Serenia’s lips parted slightly at his blunt words. His mischievous jokes seemed even more suggestive considering the place they were in.

Lucien’s gaze slowly traced her outfit once more as she lay back on the bed. The neckline of her dress was even more exposed now, and his eyes lingered on her bare thighs revealed by the skirt’s slit.

“And what were you thinking coming here dressed like that? Hmm?”

“They said I had to dress like this to get in…”

“Who dared to put you in clothes like this?”

He felt like he needed to gouge out someone’s eyes or cut off their hands. Hiding his fierce thoughts, Lucien coaxed her gently, and Serenia, bright-eyed like a child wanting praise, explained how she’d managed to get inside.

She’d stopped at the guard post and brought people back, but in the alley she found only bloodstains and no sign of Lucien. Flustered, Serenia asked for a search, but one of the city guards, not knowing she was a soldier, kept trying to dismiss her report as false.

“It was strange. There were clear bloodstains, but they tried to ignore it…”

Sensing something was off, Serenia revealed her military status and called for reinforcements. The guard’s face turned pale. After bringing in some subordinates who regularly trained with her, she scared and interrogated the guard, who confessed everything about the ship’s location and the illegal entertainment inside.

“I thought bringing the whole army would take too long, so I waited at the entrance and stole a guest’s outfit to get in.”

“You’re really determined, aren’t you?”

“Who do you think made me this way?”

Normally, Serenia was all about principles, but she’d tossed them aside and rushed to save him. Lucien’s lips curled up, pleased. She would never have worn such a revealing dress if it wasn’t for him. Even if that wasn’t her intention, the fact that she wore it for Lucien made him happy.

“So even if I hadn’t sent a signal, the army would’ve come looking for me.”

“Once they heard how big the ship was, your subordinates insisted on capturing everyone at once.”

“Of course. If they missed a ship this big, they’d have to work hard to make up for it.”

Lucien’s gentle smile briefly turned fierce, but he quickly went back to his usual pretty expression before Serenia noticed.

So, the army was already handling the situation, meaning there was nothing urgent for now. Lucien glanced at the locked door, then bowed his head toward Serenia.

“So, were you really worried about me?”

“Of course! Do you know how scared I was when I saw blood?”

“It still hurts a lot.”

Lucien, putting on the most fragile expression in the world, guided Serenia’s hand to the back of his head. The blood had mostly dried, so there was little left to stain her hand, but the sight of red made her face fall again.

“I thought you might really be dead… I was so shocked and scared…”

“Yeah, Nia. I’m sorry.”

“When I thought I might never see you again, I regretted not saying something, even just once!”

Lucien, closing the distance like a child begging for affection, buried his face in Serenia’s neck and inhaled her scent deeply. It wasn’t medicine, but somehow her fragrance filled him up and dulled his headache.

In a daze, Lucien kissed her neck and met Serenia’s teary gaze. Her eyes trembled with dozens of emotions.

“If you ever want to say something, anything, you can always tell me.”

“……”

“I’ve always listened to you, haven’t I? Do you remember?”

Her heart was still pounding—not with excitement, but a different kind of tremor. It squeezed, made it hard to breathe, and hurt, as if someone was stomping on her heart.

She thought she might never see him again. She might never laugh or talk with him again.

Thinking that, Serenia was flooded with regret for all the words she’d never said. She wished she’d spoken up, even if it meant being scorned or ridiculed, just to let him know she’d once loved him.

Maybe that was selfish, but she couldn’t bear the thought of losing Lucien without ever expressing her feelings. The dam she’d built to hold back her emotions finally burst, and everything came pouring out.

Even with Lucien alive and right in front of her, the flood wouldn’t stop. Her rational mind kept telling her to stay quiet, but the emotion rising in her throat didn’t know how to turn back—it wanted only one outcome.

She’d always known it would come to this. No matter how high she built the dam, in the end, all the waters of the world flow to the sea. The love she felt for Lucien, who was like the sea, would eventually struggle to reach that ocean.

She wished she’d said it sooner, in a better place, looking prettier, with everything wrapped up perfectly. But after all the regret and hesitation, Serenia finally spoke.

“Thinking you might disappear from this world made me so sad.”

“Yeah. Sorry for making you worry.”

“I’ve tried not to see you, but I never imagined you dying.”

“…Why think such… no, why have such scary thoughts? Why did you try not to see me?”

“If I stopped seeing you… maybe I could finally stop this one-sided love, just like you said.”

“That damned one-sided love—wait, what did you just say?”

Lucien’s face, which had been twisted with frustration over her stubborn one-sided love, suddenly went blank.

Did he just mishear something? Maybe he’d been hit on the head too hard.

No matter how many times he tried to interpret what Serenia had just said, it kept coming out to only one meaning.

Lucien stared at Serenia like a fool, stammering as he spoke.

“You… you said I’m kind, right? That I make you feel safe…?”

“Yes. You’ve always been kind to me, and I always wanted to follow you…”

“Wait, are you saying… it’s really me…?”

No matter how many times he thought about it, the words seemed to have no connection to anyone but himself. Lucien’s trembling finger pointed to his own chest.