50

Lavian had no idea what feelings Asellan harbored for her. She went about her days the same as always.

“My lady.”

“Mm.”

“Your father has sent word.”

“……”

She had seen Klen off to work with the same composure as any other morning, as though nothing had happened and nothing had changed. Then, mid-meal, her hand stopped. Camilla held out a letter bearing the Elder count’s seal.

Lavian could guess the contents without opening it, and she sat in silence for a moment rather than tearing it open right away.

“Would you open it and read it to me?”

“Of course.”

Camilla took the letter back, broke the seal, and drew out the page.

“He asks you to come home. No time is specified.”

She had visited her family home not long ago, and he was already calling for her again.

Lavian set her fork down entirely and picked up her warm cup, holding it in both hands.

She had no curiosity about the reason. It would be the same reason as always. Knowing why beforehand didn’t make it any less of an ordeal each time.

What little appetite she’d had vanished completely.

I can’t not go, either……

Her lowered lashes trembled faintly with unease as she looked at the tea, now considerably less full. Lavian swallowed the sigh trying to escape and brought the cup to her lips.

She looked serene and graceful, like something out of a painting, but her mind was busy imagining what her father would do if she didn’t come.

If I don’t go, he’ll come here. That can’t happen.

Lavian believed that being tormented by her parents was hers to bear alone. She knew better than anyone that their extremes were not something she could ask others to endure. No matter how little she had left to hide from Klen, this was one thing that could not be allowed.

She didn’t want to be humiliated in front of him any further.

So today, again, Lavian would make an outing she would otherwise avoid.

“Tell them I’ll come by before evening. I need to be back before he returns.”

“The master said he’ll be late today, so you should be able to make it in time.”

“Mm.”

Lavian put it off as long as she could. Seeing her father sooner or later made no difference, but she had no desire to face him early in the day.

The things she didn’t want to do, she pushed back and pushed back until the moment she had no choice, and only then could she bring herself to do them.

Camilla left to send the reply, and Lavian sat still for a while before finally getting up.

She had no desire to continue eating. Then her vision tilted.

“Ugh.”

Lavian breathed out from deep in her chest and steadied herself against the table.

The moment passed quickly, thankfully. The spinning settled, and she began her day with a perfectly calm expression.

She kept herself busy through the hours, and though it was quite a long stretch of time by any measure, it felt like only a moment before she was on her way to her family home.

“Welcome.”

“Is Father in his study?”

“Yes, he is.”

“I’ll find my way. Go about your work.”

“Yes.”

Lavian dismissed the butler who had come to guide her and made her way to the study alone.

For some reason, the corridor felt harder to walk today.

She moved through the hallway of the count’s residence, where traces of former glory still lingered, and stopped before the study door.

“Father. It’s Lavian.”

“Come in!”

A rough voice. Hearing that already, she knew today would require more bracing than usual.

“What is the meaning of this?!”

The shout hit her the moment she stepped inside.

Chelino spotted his daughter and slammed what he was holding onto the desk before she could even take in the room. It was a letter envelope, and it slid off the desk and dropped to the floor.

Lavian flinched at the noise but approached him without letting anything show.

“Father.”

“How dare you!”

Chelino gave her no time to understand the situation.

He came around the desk and shoved her shoulder.

Lavian swayed backward and quickly steadied herself.

“Father, please explain what’s happened.”

“You were asked about re-enrolling at the academy. I thought you had withdrawn!”

“……”

Lavian kept her face blank and gripped her own hands tightly.

How had he found out. By what means.

She turned it over in her mind, then remembered what had fallen to the floor and looked down.

The seal stamped on the envelope lying there caught her eye.

Why did that come here.

She recognized the academy’s mark at once. A document asking about re-enrollment.

Lavian held back the sigh pressing at her throat and answered with practiced ease.

“A professor suggested it. She said a leave of absence would be better than withdrawing entirely.”

“You had no right to do that without telling me. Did you?”

Chelino stroked Lavian’s cheek with a gentle touch, the way one might handle something precious.

But his expression bore no resemblance to that gentleness. His hand looked ready to crush her at any moment.

“Father, that……”

“You followed what some professor said over your own father. Should I forgive you for that? Hm?”

“It isn’t like that. I just……. No. I won’t make excuses or offer justifications. I regret it. Father, I wanted to keep studying……”

“I’ve told you time and again. What use is a clever girl. Marry well and bear children, that’s all you need. What good is studying!”

“……”

“Is that why you haven’t had a child? Is that it?”

The question she heard every time she came home had worn itself into her like a scar. She had known she would hear it again, but she hadn’t expected it to come tangled up with the academy like this.

Lavian’s eyes shifted slightly with a trace of unease, and she noticed the switch lying on the desk.

Is there any healing cream left……

Lavian had already anticipated being struck by her father and was thinking through the aftermath as she faced him.

“No. I’ve never thought that.”

“Of course you have. A girl with other ideas in her head won’t make room for a child. I was right not to stop Lena. If you can’t do it, I’ll have to push her in.”

“Father!”

Her father’s sneer knocked the breath out of her.

How could he say something like that in front of his own daughter.

“How much longer do you think that man will need our family’s backing. He’ll be riding high before long. The man has more money than he knows what to do with, the kind that buys power.”

“……”

“The moment you become unnecessary and he divorces you, we are finished. That is why you must bear a son. You must! There is no other way to secure our future.”

Just as Count Elder said, Klen would no longer need the count’s backing within a few years at most, perhaps a few months at best. To plan for what came after, the count needed a child born of Lavian.

The count intended to use the child as a means to money he could spend freely for the rest of his life without ever working again.

Lavian felt something bitter rise in her throat at her father’s transparent greed, his desperation for a grandchild.

“If he wants a divorce, he’ll have one. A child won’t change that.”

“You still have so much to learn. He started out caring only for money, but he’s begun to value appearances as well. Would he cast out the mother of his own son. He’ll need to keep you for the sake of his public image.”

The count’s eyes gleamed as he shook his head with conviction.

“All you need to do is have the child. We’ll take the child and raise it here, as is our family’s tradition.”

“Father, that tradition died out long ago.”

Lavian nearly let out a hollow laugh at the mention of tradition.

Her father had been the one to rebel against every tradition their ancestors had upheld, declaring he wanted none of it.

And now, of all things, he was invoking a tradition that had all but disappeared.

“Our family has a long and distinguished history. What does it matter. Klen has no parents, which makes it all the easier to justify. Your child will be made a member of this household.”

His entire bearing radiated the iron will to make it happen.

The vile energy radiating from her father made Lavian feel as though something was crawling across her skin.

She wanted to scratch herself raw.

“Raise the child in our family’s ways, make them heir to both houses, and everything will fall into place. If you’re not taking leave from the academy as an excuse to avoid having a child, then do what you’re supposed to. Unless you want Lena in your bed.”

Lavian felt the pride she had held so carefully threatening to shatter. She wanted to scream. She wanted to demand why he had to be so utterly base.

But she could not lower herself to that.

The pride that told her she was not her father, that she was different, was what kept her standing straight.

“I hesitated because I wanted to study more languages. But I had fully intended to withdraw from the academy. I don’t know why this came here, but it has nothing to do with having a child.”

Even as fury rose at her father’s twisted reasoning, she explained herself with even more composure and calm.

The effort of holding it all in made her head swim faintly, her vision going dim, but she kept her face perfectly still.

“Then perhaps I’ll be holding a grandchild by next year. I’ll speak to the family physician, so you should start going to the hospit……”

“That won’t be necessary.”

At that moment, the study door opened and Klen walked in.