How to Reverse My Wife’s Death

Two pairs of eyes met in silence.

She had been the one to ask to be called Lennon. And yet hearing it, her expression had gone rigid.

Bewilderment. And something else.

What was it — that emotion held in the depths of those dark eyes?

“Why so startled? I only called you what you asked me to.”

Lacy still said nothing. She seemed to not know what to say. She had said the words — but perhaps she had never truly expected Rafez to honor them.

“I thought about it. And yes — there’s no reason I can’t accommodate your request. I married you knowing you were a Lennon.”

Rafez reached out and took a sip of wine. Then continued.

“But you know full well what that family name means to me. You knew — and still you made that request.”

“That was——”

“When it’s just the two of us, I’ll call you as you wish. But in front of others — that isn’t possible. And I don’t think that’s what you want either.”

“You would call me…… Lennon?”

Rafez gave a nod.

“But there’s a condition. I’d like you to call me Felista in return.”

He had thought it over. About attaching the Felista name to Lacy — a name she had never wanted.

Had Rafez not been a Grand Duke, Lacy would have been addressed not as Grand Duchess wherever she went, but as Madame Felista.

That would have made it even harder to bear.

She had entered a marriage she never wanted, and had thought of it as nothing more than a hollow facade.

But living in the same space without ever truly facing each other didn’t resolve anything.

Even if this marriage was a trap laid by someone. Even if to another, it was a prison.

Breaking through all of it — that was what Rafez wanted. What he intended to do.

If he didn’t fall into the trap, he could never uncover it. And beyond that, he could never find the truth.

And so I will fall into the trap. And one day, I will put the one who laid it into a trap of my own. One they will never escape.

“……Why would you go that far?”

“I’m simply giving you what you want.”

Even with that offer on the table, Lacy’s expression didn’t ease.

“I want to try understanding you, even a little. In return, I’d like you to try thinking of me, even a little. That isn’t too much to ask, is it?”

“But why——”

“Because you are my wife.”

Rafez held his wine glass out toward Lacy.

“A toast. To my wife — Lennon.”

* * *

It was a long night.

The first truly long night for Lacy and Rafez.

They didn’t say much. Nothing of great importance.

Perhaps it was the sound of the rain, still falling without end. Or the atmosphere of the dark night with nothing but candlelight to lean on. Or perhaps it was the chill that had crept in after getting caught in the rain.

Whatever the reason — after that first sip of wine, the memories that followed were not particularly clear.

“Your Highness the Grand Duchess, it’s time to wake up. Breakfast is being served downstairs.”

Karin came in and drew back the curtains, rousing Lacy.

Still half-asleep, Lacy pushed herself partway up. In her drowsy, disoriented state, the unfamiliar voice made her think of Siz, left behind at the capital estate.

She had only been told that Siz had matters to attend to and needed to stay.

“And His Highness the Grand Duke……”

Karin noticed Rafez’s absence at Lacy’s side and asked carefully.

At that, Lacy turned instinctively toward the empty space beside her.

“Ah — he said he had something to attend to.”

Rafez had left the room after dinner. Whether he had truly had business to see to, or had simply been avoiding sharing the room with Lacy, she couldn’t say — but as far as Lacy was concerned, it had worked out well.

If Rafez hadn’t left, Lacy would have found some way to avoid the situation herself.

“I see. It being your first night here, you must have been exhausted.”

“I heard — that this is the room His Highness used as a child.”

“Ah, yes — that’s right. It is a little worn for it. If there’s anything that makes you uncomfortable——”

“No, it’s fine.”

Though both were head maids of House Felista, there was a subtle difference between Glen at the capital estate and Karin here. Both carried that characteristic Felista restraint — efficient and sparing with words.

But compared to Glen, who had been blunt and particularly cold toward Lacy on the rare occasions they had crossed paths, Karin felt marginally less so.

“Is there a room free nearby?”

“Ah — there is, though I’m not sure whether it’s currently in a state to be used.”

In a state to be used? That didn’t matter. She only needed somewhere she could slip into without drawing attention.

She had no way of knowing whether Rafez would say he had business again tonight and leave.

But surely even Rafez wasn’t planning on actually sharing the room.

“I see. Thank you.”

“Not at all, Your Highness. I haven’t done anything worth thanking.”

* * *

“Come, sit down. Did you sleep well?”

“Former Grand Duke, Former Grand Duchess.”

Lacy greeted Louis and Graine, who were already seated, and took one of the empty chairs.

“The title is quite a mouthful, isn’t it — must be tiring to say. I find it uncomfortable to hear, myself.”

“Ah — no, not at all. I’m perfectly fine with it.”

“Then try calling me Mother instead. And if that feels uncomfortable, you’re welcome to use my name.”

“Ahem.”

Louis cleared his throat and glanced sideways at Graine.

From Louis’s perspective, he couldn’t understand why Graine was going to such lengths to make Lacy feel welcome.

Louis didn’t even know the contents of the letter Graine had sent to Rafez.

“It’s me who finds it uncomfortable — to hear it.”

Just then, Rafez came in and took the seat beside Lacy.

“I apologize for being late.”

He was in his traveling clothes, looking very much like someone who had just hurried back from somewhere. It seemed his business hadn’t been a pretense after all.

For Lacy, at least, it was a relief — she had been spared the uncomfortable situation of dining with her in-laws without Rafez present.

“Rafez, where did you go?”

“I had some matters to attend to. I’m sorry, Mother.”

“You came all this way to rest and recover, and here you are with work even now. Try to set it down while you’re here, at least. I’ve already sent for the physician — he should be arriving soon.”

Having said her piece, Graine lifted her spoon and helped herself to the soup.

This sort of gentle scolding from Graine appeared to be a common occurrence in this household. The lack of any particular reaction from Louis and the servants nearby suggested as much.

“The physician? Mother, there’s really no need for——”

Watching Graine fuss and lecture her son with such evident worry, Lacy was suddenly reminded of Rose — and a laugh slipped out before she could catch it.

Rafez, mid-sentence, stopped and looked at her. Louis and Graine did the same.

“……”

Lacy, who had been quietly tearing her bread, only then noticed the silence and looked up.

“Grand Duchess — what’s so funny?”

“Pardon?”

She had only meant to think it — and yet it had actually come out.

“Ho ho — yes, I imagine this is rather amusing. I don’t know what Rafez has been like in the capital, but from what I can see, he must have been quite a different person there.”

“——?”

Graine laughed and took Lacy’s side. Then moved on to another topic entirely.

“In any case — where exactly does it hurt? Word has spread all over the capital that you’re unwell.”

“……I’m fine, Mother. Please don’t worry.”

* * *

What a strange thing.

To be sitting at a meal with the Felista family in the Grand Duchy, and find herself thinking of Rose. To realize, in the house of an enemy of all places, that a mother scolding her child looked the same in any household.

Still — it was a relief that things had been less uncomfortable than expected. Louis, still silent and guarded toward her, was not easy to be around — but thinking about it, that was only natural. If anything, she understood Louis better than she understood Graine, who welcomed her so warmly.

Lost in these thoughts, Lacy was wandering around the room when Rafez came in.

“Ah — here you are.”

Rafez had come to change clothes, and at the sight of Lacy, he hesitated for a moment, unsure of what to do.

In that pause, Lacy came toward him.

“Are you feeling unwell somewhere — Felista?”

Felista.

Rafez questioned his own ears. Had he heard that correctly?

And then it clicked. Lacy, who had asked to be called Lennon and then gone rigid the moment he actually said it.

So this was how it felt.

They had exchanged a few more words after that last night — but Lacy hadn’t called Rafez anything at all. Not by any name or title.

He had asked her to call him Felista — but it had been said in the spirit of an eye for an eye. He had also been curious how she would react.

And yet.