Fortunately, the change of subject was a success. Danyu quickly got caught up in her own story, seemingly forgetting everything she had been about to say to me, and settled naturally onto the living room sofa. I brought out some tea from the kitchen and set it in front of her, and she drank it down in great gulps, steam still rising from the cup.

She must have had quite a serious fight with Astaire. Thinking that, I sat down on the sofa across from her, and immediately Danyu’s eyes, full of grievance, locked onto me. That was the signal telling me to hurry up and ask about her situation.

“So what happened this time?”

“Is Astaire always like that, never talking about himself?”

I tossed the question at Danyu, who was belatedly furrowing her brow at the hot tea, and an answer came back without a moment’s hesitation. The way she was fuming, she must have had quite the argument.

“Whenever I ask him something, it’s always ‘I’m fine, do whatever you want.’”

“He probably said it because he really is fine.”

Men were simpler than women tended to think. If they liked something, they said they liked it. If they didn’t, they said they didn’t. That was the case most of the time. I said it casually and sank back into the sofa, and a rebuttal came right back at me.

“If you were the one who said that, I’d believe it. You’re not the type to say you’re fine when you’re not. But when Astaire says he’s fine, the feeling is different. I can’t tell whether he actually means it, or whether he’s just going along with what I want.”

“Well, he does have that side to him, I’ll admit.”

There was some truth to what Danyu said. Astaire was such a considerate person by nature that he often ended up taking losses all over the place. The fact that he had stayed by my side as a friend all this time alone said enough about how patient and thoughtful he was.

Come to think of it, Astaire’s nickname among our peers had been “the Pope.” It was thanks to his peacemaker-like attitude of letting things slide with an easy “either way is fine.” Danyu, by contrast, was the type to make her likes and dislikes clear in everything, so it was understandable that the two of them clashed often. Though in truth, what passed for a clash was almost always Danyu pressing Astaire relentlessly while Astaire stood there at a loss, stamping his feet.

In any case, it was certain that the quarrels between the two of them had become more frequent lately. It had started when they began preparing for the wedding, now only a few months away, and every time it happened, the only one left in an awkward position in the middle was me. The two of them would end up making up with smiles in the end, so it was only me getting knocked around from both sides who came away drained.

“And on top of that, this is a wedding. Something the two of us are doing together. I’m the only one excited and worked up about it, and Astaire acts like it doesn’t matter either way.”

The energy Danyu had been putting into her complaints drained from her shoulders in an instant. Her sullen face was full of worry, which told me today’s argument had been a little more serious. At times like this, it was better for my health to simply listen quietly rather than offer advice. 

It was obvious I would get an earful either way: if I said Astaire was in the wrong, she would snap at me for talking badly about him, and if I said he was in the right, she would snap at me for taking his side. All of it was wisdom I had accumulated through experience.

“I know he’s been busy lately with lectures and recitals. There are a lot of things to sort out with the Werner family over the inheritance because of the issue of him coming in as a live-in son-in-law. Compared to that I have more time, so it’s only natural that I’m the one paying more attention to the wedding arrangements. I understand all of that. But he could at least tell me his opinion. If he’s going to leave everything to me like this, why did he ask me to marry him in the first place? No, before that, why did he even propose?”

Danyu stamped her feet and gulped down her tea. The two of them had gotten engaged not long after I returned to the capital, so it had already been two years. Considering that an engagement was generally the stage before marriage, it was not common for an engagement period to drag on this long. Rumors of all kinds had circulated about the two of them because of it, but since neither of the parties involved paid any attention to them, I didn’t think much of it either.

What actually troubled the two of them was not outside rumors but the difference in their opinions. Danyu pestered him saying she wanted to get married as soon as possible, while Astaire soothed her and told her to take more time to think it over. Personally, I understood Astaire’s position. Danyu had talent, and knowing Astaire, who was so gentle, it was obvious he couldn’t bear the thought of her talent going to waste because of him.

Still, ever since the engagement ceremony, I had found myself thinking that I wished the two of them would just get married already. It wasn’t simply because I was tired of being dragged into their arguments. I couldn’t explain it clearly even to myself, but I seemed to want a conclusion to come quickly. What kind of conclusion, though, I wasn’t sure.

“Astaire just wants to go along with whatever you want, I think. Rather than doing what he wants, he’s the type to find his happiness in doing what other people want. That’s just the kind of person he is.”

I sorted through my cluttered thoughts and offered something that sounded like reasonable advice, and Danyu, her face still sullen, gave a small nod.

“I know. That’s exactly why I want to be the person who does what Astaire wants. He’s spent his whole life accommodating other people, so wouldn’t it be wonderful if he could finally enjoy having someone accommodate him for once?”

“If you care about Astaire that much, then why do things you know he’d hate? He’ll make a scene when he finds out you came here at this hour.”

“I told you. Petty revenge.”

Though it had never been said aloud directly, Astaire was far from pleased about Danyu meeting with me at all. To be more precise, it wasn’t just that he wasn’t pleased; it was closer to saying he disliked it. Astaire had always carried an anxiety about the past between me and Danyu that he couldn’t fully understand. Danyu wanted endlessly to reassure him on that front, but nothing she did could erase his unease.

Every time I saw Astaire anxious like that, I found his attitude puzzling and hard to understand. Astaire and me. If you compared the two of us, Astaire was obviously the better man.

He had grown up in a good family like Danyu, his character had no rough edges, and above all, he loved her wholeheartedly. The fact that Danyu had once loved me was because her world had been very small at the time, not because my existence had been something absolute to her.

From the moment she first whispered love to me, I had anticipated that a day like this would come. That someday someone as radiant as her would appear, and her love would shift to him. Perhaps recommending Astaire as Danyu’s new piano teacher had been, in some way, for the sake of that very moment.

“Honestly, Astaire worries about the most unnecessary things. I guess it really bothers him that I liked you for so long. But it’s been ages since I was completely rejected and got over it. And besides, it’s not like I built that whole one-sided love by myself, is it? You never had the slightest interest in me, so I honestly don’t know what he has to worry about.”

Danyu said this and laughed freely. After the Jubilion, Danyu had confessed to me while handing over a key, and I had turned her down cleanly. At the time, Danyu had smiled brightly and said her goodbyes to me, as though she had already expected the rejection. That beautiful farewell had left a dull ache in my chest.

“You must feel relieved too, right? The one who made things so awkward for you is getting married.”

I had just been quietly recalling that time when Danyu asked.

“Relieved isn’t quite it. It just feels a little strange. It’s hard to put into words.”

I was caught off guard by the sudden question and fumbled for an answer, and Danyu laughed as though she understood completely.

“That makes sense. I was really just a child when I first met you. Back then I cried every day because you didn’t like me, and threw tantrums saying I was going to marry Sio and no one else. And now that child is getting married. Even I think it feels strange.”

“It certainly does.”

But that wasn’t all of it. I couldn’t find the words to explain what this feeling was, though, so I had no choice but to fumble again. Fortunately, Danyu didn’t seem particularly interested in pursuing the topic. Before I knew it, her eyes were already sparkling with curiosity about something else.

“A student you have such complicated feelings about is getting married. You must have a wonderful gift prepared, right? What are you going to give me?”

“Not sure yet.”

A gift. I had been thinking that I should give her something wonderful, just as she said. Among all the students who had passed through my life and moved on, Danyu was the one who had stayed the longest. Even setting aside the word “student,” she was the person who had remained by my side the longest of anyone in my life. It was her wedding, so it wasn’t the kind of occasion I could wrap up by tossing over a congratulatory envelope the way I would for anyone else.

“Perfect. If you haven’t thought of anything yet, there’s something I’d like to receive.”

“What do you want? If it’s something I can do, I’ll do it.”

“It’s absolutely something you can do. It won’t even be difficult for you.”

Even hearing that I hadn’t prepared anything, Danyu looked pleased rather than disappointed. It was unusual enough to make me tilt my head, since Danyu was not the type to ask for things, and then an excited voice reached my ears.