58. Outsider

For some reason, just the Akuris attendants and coachman’s refusal to speak was enough to drive Rosia mad with frustration. There was no need for Verdick to add to it. In a situation where nothing went as planned, Rosia tried hard to hide her unsettled expression.

‘It’s Akuris’s business.’

‘It’s your business. Let’s go together.’

‘I refuse.’

‘Rosia.’

‘I don’t want to.’

For the first time, she openly refused his will, but Verdick, far from being displeased or angry, sat across from her with a calm face, heading together to the Akuris mansion. With so much on her mind, even the short trip to the mansion felt endlessly long. Rosia pressed her well-manicured nails to her lips and leaned her head against the rattling carriage window, unable to take her eyes off the glass.

“Enough.”

Contrary to Rosia’s expectations, Verdick moved easily in the shaking carriage and reached out to grab Rosia’s hand. She pulled her hand away, annoyed, but it was a useless gesture. Verdick sat beside her, took out a handkerchief, and wrapped it around the nail she’d been biting. Seeing the white handkerchief slowly stain red, Rosia finally felt the heat at her fingertip.

“Promise me one thing.”

Rosia pulled her hand from Verdick’s grasp as she spoke. Since getting into the carriage, Verdick hadn’t left her side even once, while Rosia hadn’t looked at him even once, and now was no different.

“No matter what you see, no matter what you hear.”

“…….”

“You’re marrying me.”

Even as worry and anxiety about what had happened at home overflowed, she was determined to do her part. Verdick gazed at her with calm eyes, unmoved by Rosia’s harsh words.

“If you grant me one request.”

Rosia had only expected a simple yes or no, so Verdick’s answer made her meet his gaze for the first time. Despite her irritated actions, her eyes were red and her anxious expression completely unguarded. Verdick bit the inside of his lower lip.

“If the bleeding stops before we arrive, I won’t break off the engagement.”

“If only you weren’t the Crown Prince, Your Highness…”

“If I weren’t?”

Her life would be half as frustrating. Even now, his behavior grated on her nerves, and Rosia couldn’t take back her impulsive words, only glancing at Verdick before turning back to the window. The weather, which had been clear, suddenly grew heavy as if a shower might burst, and her anxiety seemed to grow with it.

“Ah!”

“We’re getting married, right?”

“…….”

“Sorry if that hurt.”

As Verdick wrapped the handkerchief around her aching finger, Rosia winced at the pain. Both of them seemed pathetic—Verdick, who played games with no intention of breaking off the engagement, and Rosia, who babbled nonsense out of fear that she’d lose everything if his feelings changed. Her head throbbed.

“It would be nice if you just looked at me.”

“Don’t add to it.”

“Add to what?”

“I’m already overwhelmed.”

“Did my actions upset you?”

How could they not? Fearing another slip of the tongue, Rosia looked down at her hand in Verdick’s grasp instead of meeting his eyes. The wound between her nail and skin must have stopped bleeding by now, but Verdick’s large, rough hand showed no sign of letting go. She didn’t dislike the sight, but she didn’t like it either. As soon as the carriage stopped, Rosia pulled her hand away and hurried into the mansion.

“Tell me what’s going on.”

“With our low status, we don’t know the details.”

“Tell me what you do know.”

“Well…”

Verdick belatedly got out of the carriage, flexing his now-empty hand as if regretting the lost warmth, while a nearby attendant bowed to him. The uneasy atmosphere outside made everything feel even more out of place.

“Greetings to the Crown Prince.”

“Sir Edgar.”

“Let’s go in together.”

“I’d rather not.”

“…….”

“Rosia wouldn’t like it.”

“She’d like it even less if she knew you were sneaking around.”

A young Marquis riding alone. Verdick found this interesting, but was now certain something had happened at Akuris. If it wasn’t Edgar, Rosia, or the Marquis, then at the center of it all must be Akuris’s youngest daughter, Felicia. Verdick stepped back, adopting a passive stance as if he’d lost interest. But, following Edgar inside as suggested, Verdick’s indifference didn’t last. At one doorway, he saw Rosia, always so composed, now covering her mouth with both hands and sobbing, and something flashed in his eyes—whether it was interest or discomfort, he couldn’t tell.

“Rosia.”

“Ah, Edgar… Felicia, that idiot…”

“…….”

At the sight of Edgar, Rosia clung to his sleeve as if it was a lifeline, but her trembling grip was unstable. Edgar, who had never seen his sister cry even when cut by a sword, turned his head to the chaotic scene in Felicia’s room. In the heat of summer, buckets heaped with precious ice were scattered everywhere, and on Felicia’s bed, doctors and their assistants rushed back and forth.

“It was an accident. She’ll be fine.”

“…….”

“Looks like she burned something. She’s not badly hurt.”

“…Do I have to keep living like this?”

Seeing the crowd and the Marquis couple slumped on the sofa, Rosia’s worst fears were put to rest only briefly by Edgar’s words. She had chosen to leave to strengthen the family, but now she realized she’d become someone who couldn’t hear what was happening, only respond when called. Edgar, farther away, knew everything, but Rosia, stuck at the palace with the Crown Prince, could only come full of anxiety, forced to accept everything with her eyes alone. She felt betrayed.

“Edgar.”

“We’ll talk later.”

“…….”

“Please, Your Highness.”

Following Edgar’s gaze, Rosia saw Verdick standing at a distance. Her tear-soaked eyes scrunched up, and she couldn’t even catch Edgar to pour out all she wanted to say. It was ridiculous to think she’d just asked Verdick not to break off the engagement. Rosia wanted to quit everything—even marriage—right now.

“I’m not good at refusing requests.”

“…….”

“Wouldn’t it be better to go in and see for yourself?”

As Verdick approached, Rosia turned away from Felicia’s room and strode in the opposite direction. She remembered Felicia’s childish insistence on using a room as far away as possible from the piano she hated, and her pouting face, and grew even more annoyed. She wanted to check on Felicia herself, but couldn’t.

“Rosia.”

“Please go back, Your Highness.”

“…….”

“I’ll accept any punishment, just…”

“If that punishment is breaking off the engagement, would you accept it?”

As Rosia tried to enter her room, Verdick caught her, and a struggle began. Rosia looked up at him, exhausted and resentful, while Verdick’s face showed no emotion. Instead, he overlapped his hand with hers on the doorknob, pulling with force.

“You look like you want to right now.”

“…….”

“If not, stay with me. It’s better than being alone.”

“I prefer being alone.”

“How do you know without trying?”

Even now, the warmth of his hand was annoyingly intense. Rosia didn’t reply, pulled her hand free, and stepped back. Verdick watched her tired back, then flexed the hand that had touched her, following her into the room as the door closed with a quiet thud.

＊＊＊

It had been a while since the nightmares returned. Yuan, trapped between piles of corpses, resigned himself to his situation and struggled to breathe. Inhaling, the stench seeped into every part of his body; exhaling, it swept through him again. Any hope of rescue was long gone, and he’d recently given up the pathetic wish to be buried instead. That was the only mercy this dream offered him.

‘…da questo dolore.’

(…from this pain,)

Gailen’s faint voice echoed, oddly vivid. Yuan had dreamed of Gailen’s dying voice hundreds of times, but never gotten used to it; he closed his eyes and wept. The only mercy became t*rture.

‘O ti darò tutto, trascinami nel tuo dolore.’

(Or let me share in your pain.)

Lyrics he’d heard before, but didn’t remember. Yuan turned his head at the close voice and saw Felicia, pressed under corpses like him, smiling and singing to him.

“Ah, ah…”

Only a strangled m*an escaped Yuan’s throat. Felicia’s face grew more real with each blink—horrifyingly so. She was crushed beneath the dead, her pale skin stained with thick, dark fl*id, her long, sunset-colored hair tangled with lifeless limbs. Yuan tried desperately to free her, but he too was pinned and helpless.

“Lord Yuan!”

It was a thunderous shout. Snapping back to reality at the sound of his name, Yuan saw Sejio gripping his shoulder, holding a candle from the nightstand, and wearing a serious expression. Yuan finally exhaled deeply, the thick lavender scent filling the room. The stench was gone.

“You seemed fine for a while.”

“…So it seemed.”

“We’ll have to get a new bonnet.”

Sejio gently smoothed the bonnet, its shape ruined from Yuan’s constant fiddling since Felicia left, and opened the curtains near the bed. The weather was obliviously bright. If only it were gloomy, it would be easier to talk. Sejio clicked his tongue and handed Yuan the letter he’d been holding.

[ Yuan ]

His name, written in pale gray ink on a black envelope, felt unfamiliar. Yuan checked the seal of the black beast, already broken, and washed his face, glaring at Sejio as if blaming him.

“What power do I have, really.”

“Don’t be ridiculous.”

“I’ll have to prepare to return to the capital.”

“…….”

“They’ve located the missing people.”

Maybe he wanted to help, since he’d gotten himself involved. Yuan thought it would be easier to hear it from Sejio, and tossed the envelope onto the bed, pressing his aching temple. He briefly considered disappearing while searching for the missing, but stopped at Sejio’s serious face.

“You might be accused.”

“…Midonia Empire, then.”

“Only Princess Arina knows so far.”

“Of all people.”

Yuan slowly got out of bed, roughly tied on the long robe Sejio handed him, and strode barefoot across the cool floor, feeling his headache ease a little.

“How long to prepare for the capital?”

“Just need you, Count.”

“Give me an hour.”

Sejio nodded quietly and left Yuan’s room as Yuan entered the bathroom. The urgent letter from Akuris was still in Sejio’s hand, but he had no intention of delivering it to Yuan until after meeting Princess Arina. Even Yuan was turning his back on himself, so Sejio felt he should be on Yuan’s side, at least for now.