Chapter 39

Now only Lyle and she remained in the living room.

Ethea could not understand why he stayed behind instead of leaving.

If it was because he was worried Gin might fall ill again while asleep, then she supposed she could understand that.

Lyle idly touched his teacup and lowered his gaze for a moment, then looked at Ethea again.

Their eyes met before she even realized it, and Ethea grew awkward.

Thinking of how she had clung to him before they came here using the Dimension Gate scroll made her feel a little embarrassed.

‘Don’t think about it. The more so, the more indifferent I have to look. If I become conscious of him and gets tense now of all times…… that would be rather strange.’

“Ethea.”

“Y-yes.”

“Actually, earlier, I wanted to say it too.”

“What……?”

“I mean…… the tea, I also thought this tea was delicious. I just wanted to say that.”

“Ah, yes.”

“I was trying to say it before Seisil did.”

“Yes, all right.”

“Anyway, your tea is delicious. It’s the best.”

“All right, all right.”

‘How plain and childish. He says something so trivial with such seriousness that he makes even me nervous.’

He opened his mouth again.

“You know, Ethea. I……”

What was he trying to say that made him trail off like that?

Ethea nodded and waited for the next words.

But Lyle shook his head.

“No, never mind. It’s nothing.”

Why start and then stop?

Ethea hated it when someone made her wait and then said it was nothing.

She took a sip of the now-cold tea.

What should she say?

It seemed she too had something to tell him…….

After thinking it over, she suddenly remembered.

“Right, that.”

Murmuring so, she brought out the Hillus Empire Bank passbook she had hidden deep inside the house.

Seeing the passbook, Lyle set down his teacup.

“Ethea, why are you suddenly bringing that out……”

“I can’t accept this.”

Ethea held the passbook out to him.

Without taking it, he asked,

“Why?”

“You said the limit is unlimited. It feels burdensome.”

Literally speaking, receiving 100 million Goldium every month felt burdensome.

Likewise, going to the Imperial Palace in person to receive it was burdensome too.

She hated being the subject of people’s gossip.

That was why she had asked him to handle it himself, but instead he had created an account from which unlimited money could be withdrawn.

What on earth was she supposed to do with this?

Did he really think a mother raising a child needed this much?

Ethea waited for him to take the passbook away.

But he did not even touch it.

“I don’t understand.”

“What?”

“Why is it burdensome for it to be unlimited? Ah. If it’s safety you’re worried about, don’t worry. Seisil put a protection spell on it, so no one can misuse it.”

“That’s not what I mean, it’s the amount……”

“The amount, what? It’s not as if you’re going to buy the entire continent anyway. From my side too, it’s troublesome to deposit a set amount every month, so I just made it unlimited. Think of it simply.”

Ah. Now that he put it that way, that was true.

But somehow she still did not want to just accept it as it was.

“Even so, unlimited…… it feels as though Gin and I are being given special treatm……”

Lyle cut her off.

“You are being given special treatment.”

“Lyle.”

“You’ve been raising a special child all by yourself this whole time. So of course you should receive special treatment. Something on this level is only natural, so let me do this.”

“……”

“Today really gave me a lot to think about. When I think that even when Gin was sick or hurt in the past, you endured it alone…… I end up hating myself so much.”

“Don’t worry about that part. Maybe you don’t know this, but Gin is originally a child who hardly even catches colds. He’s incredibly sturdy.”

“Even so, compared to all the hardship you went through, this kind of repayment is only a small thing. So don’t say any more about this and just use it.”

Many words swirled inside her, but in the end Ethea nodded.

“All right.”

It had indeed been hard raising Gin.

However, it was not as though Lyle had created Gin just to torment his friend.

He had done it after learning that the Emperor intended to send Ethea as a bride to King Garental, and to stop that from happening.

In the end, one could even say that Gin was the symbol of his effort for her freedom.

Of course, even if the process had been Lyle’s unilateral action.

“Thank you, I’ll make good use of it.”

“Please don’t thank me. I’m the one who should be grateful.”

“……”

“You know, Ethea.”

“Yes.”

“I……”

The way he trailed off again made it seem as though he were about to add something important.

Ethea nodded and waited for his next words, but suddenly, as if he had changed his mind, he shook his head as though it were nothing.

“No. I should get going. Please take good care of Gin.”

Ethea felt that today Lyle was holding back an awful lot of words.

Perhaps because of that, it was quietly frustrating.

＊  ＊  ＊

Today was the day when the blue moon, Sapphire, shone the brightest.

But Lyle could not perceive blue light as blue.

To him, who could perceive everything in the world only as bright red or dark red, the blue moon was merely a gloomy sphere.

Beneath that gloomy light pouring down, he walked on quietly.

Normally, Lyle would have left Ethea’s house and used a scroll to return quickly to the palace. But right now, after stepping out past the front gate, Lyle was walking through the night streets. From time to time, he looked back at her house, or let out a smile as he went along slowly, almost as if on a stroll. Of course, that smile was soon clouded over by a lonely cast.

There were several things he had not been able to tell Ethea.

One was that his long-standing engagement would soon be going through the process of annulment. Another was whether he might take Gin to the palace and let him stay just one night, so he could talk with him more tonight.

Those were words that had circled in his chest several times when he was left alone with her in the living room.

But in the end, he could not say them.

Because he was afraid.

What would come of telling her about the broken engagement? In any case, Ethea would not feel anything about his annulment. Whether the childhood friend she kept pushing away was engaged to someone or broke that engagement, she would probably react with something like, ‘So what am I supposed to do about it?’ Lyle’s heart was uniquely weak only when it came to Ethea. Lyle was afraid that this heart of his would be hurt by Ethea’s cynical response.

It was the same with taking Gin away. Today had passed safely enough, but there was no certainty that Gin would not be in pain again. Gin must not suffer again, and still less should the reason be the very existence of a father. And if he did become ill like that, would Ethea’s heart not collapse? Lyle absolutely could not bear to see that.

So it was better simply to keep the words in his heart unspoken.

The wish to fall asleep while reading picture books together with Gin should be postponed until later, and later still.

Would there ever come a time when he could approach them freely without it making them uncomfortable?

That moon might know the answer.

“I like you. No, all of you…… I love you.”

Only after walking for as long as an hour did Lyle finally use a scroll and return to the palace.