“Who said it was acceptable to hit a woman? I trust this will never happen to Yunjoo again. This is the one and only time. Can I take it that nothing like this will happen again?”

“If you knew why I did it, you’d thank me.”

“I have no desire to know, and no need to. This woman does not go around doing as she pleases. Yunjoo and I will handle things ourselves. And one more thing. Yunjoo works at the cultural foundation. I gave her the position. From now on, if you need to see Yunjoo, please go through me. Good day.”

“…….”

“Let’s go inside.”

Kangwook placed a light hand on Yunjoo’s shoulder and guided her into the house, biting down hard on his teeth to hold back the rage boiling up inside him. He could not understand how a father could do that to his own daughter, and the sight of her watching it all with such a composed expression made the pain unbearable.

Yunjoo wished the ground would swallow her up. Of all people, Kangwook had seen her at her lowest. The thought made her bite her lip. Rather than gratitude for stepping in and stopping her father, what rose up first was resentment. Why had he come home at this hour, when he never did?

Even so, she couldn’t say she wasn’t grateful that he had stood in front of her father and claimed her as his own. Whether or not he meant it, whether he had simply taken the side of the woman he lived with, the fact that he had stood squarely in her corner in front of her father made her chest sting.

Even at home, when she stood up to her father, no one had ever stepped forward to take her side. With Kangwook speaking the way he did, so convincingly real, the tears broke free for the first time. She had never once cried after a fight with her father.

The eyes of her family watching her had always hurt too much, and not wanting to cry had made her press it all down and endure. But today, like a fool, she broke. Kangwook held her without a word. This person is warm too, she thought. His heart is beating too.

Yunjoo cried until his clothes were soaked through, and the wetness seeped into Kangwook’s chest as well. He thought of how she had carried all that pain inside her and still smiled through it, and the image of her composed face refused to leave him, and it hurt all the more for that. The thought that this was why she had lived so fiercely controlled, enduring everything so thoroughly, made Kangwook despise himself.

If only he had looked at Yunjoo properly, even a little. That regret tore through him. His chest ached as deeply as her tears, and it was then that he finally understood. Why the sight of her hurt him. Why, now that Yunjoo was trying to turn away from him, he could not let her go.

His mind cleared at last, and in that instant he heard a thud, and everything in front of him went bright. He could see it plainly, his own heart, burst open along with Yunjoo’s tears. He was in love with Cha Yunjoo. Kangwook gently patted her back as her crying slowly quieted, and he made a silent vow that he would never let her cry like this again.

When her tears finally settled, he sat her down on the sofa.

“Stay here for a moment.”

He listened to her sniffling as he went into the kitchen, filled a glass of water, and brought it out to her.

“Drink this and calm down.”

“Mr. Kangwook, thank you. And I’m sorry.”

Yunjoo kept her eyes on the floor, unable to look at him as she spoke. She was flustered and bewildered by herself. She truly hadn’t expected to cry like that, and she hadn’t known that once the tears started, she would be so powerless to stop them.

She found herself looking at Kangwook anew, this man who had held her without saying a word. She was startled, wondering if this was the same Choi Kangwook she had known all this time. But she couldn’t bring herself to face him. She was ashamed of the state he had seen her in, and the humiliation was more than she could stand. Kangwook called out to her as she sat with her head down, unable to look at him, murmuring quietly.

“Cha Yunjoo.”

“…….”

“Yunjoo, Cha Yunjoo, look at me.”

“…….”

Yunjoo. That soft, warm sound of it sent a sharp, sweet ache through her.

“Cha Yunjoo, don’t bow your head in front of anyone. If you’ve done something wrong, then apologize. But keep your shoulders back and your head up. My person can do that.”

At his words, something in her chest rang out, a sound like a vast sheet of ice cracking apart, so loud it left her ears ringing. What had he just said? My person. Yunjoo couldn’t help but lift her head. These were words she had never heard in all her life.

“What did you just say?”

“You, Cha Yunjoo, are still my wife and still in the place beside me, which means you belong to me. So trust in Choi Kangwook and hold your head up wherever you are. Even if it’s in front of your father.”

These weren’t the words Kangwook had wanted to say. He felt the ache of not being able to say what he truly meant, even as he spoke to her. He couldn’t say out loud the feelings he had only just come to understand. What Yunjoo wanted was clear. A divorce. And yet he could no longer give her that.

‘Cha Yunjoo, what I really want to say is that you’re my woman. But I’ll say it when you come to me.’

Yunjoo stared at him with red, swollen eyes, struck by how sincere he sounded.

“Do I look pitiful to you?”

“What? Does Cha Yunjoo think she’s pitiful?”

“I’m not. Don’t you dare think less of me just because you saw me like this.”

“Right, Cha Yunjoo is not pitiful at all. So drop that nonsense.”

“Mr. Kangwook.”

“What I’m saying is that you can use me right now. I’m more than worth using.”

From this point on, Kangwook intended to hold on to Yunjoo with everything he had, no matter what it took. This was the first love he had ever admitted to himself. He hadn’t recognized what Yunjoo was to him because he had believed this kind of feeling was something he would never know in his lifetime.

But now that he knew, with absolute certainty, he had no intention of locking it away or letting it go. He would stake whatever it took to keep Yunjoo by his side. Yunjoo sat there with her puffy eyes, unable to put away the look of doubt in them.

“Go upstairs and rest. Have you eaten dinner?”

“I’m not hungry. I’ll head up.”

She went up to her room, washed up quickly, and lay down on the bed with her eyes closed. The moment she closed them, her scattered thoughts drifted toward one person. Choi Kangwook. Why had he done that?

The image of him stepping in front of her father and the face he had made when he told her she could hold her head up refused to leave her mind. Today, Kangwook looked different to her. He had stood in her way, blocked her father, and protected her without giving him a chance to say another word.

It was the first time in her life she had seen someone stand so unflinching in front of her father. Her brothers had always watched his moods and tried not to do anything to set him off. So she could only imagine what it had been like for her mother, herself, and her older sister. A long sigh broke free. Thinking of her father and her family home always left her chest tight, and she would find herself gasping for air.

Even so, she couldn’t let go of the desire to leave it all behind. If she stayed at the theater company for about a year, she could save enough to go wherever she wanted. That was why she was working and getting through each day, but her father’s sudden appearance made her feel rushed.

She even thought about telling Kangwook her plan and asking for his help. With the man she had known up until now, she couldn’t have said any of it. But with this man who had been acting so differently lately, maybe, just maybe, he would listen. Lost in all these thoughts, Yunjoo didn’t bother wiping the tears that slipped out again on their own, and closed her eyes just like that.

* * *

When Kangwook stepped out of his room, the warm, nutty smell of fresh bread filled the house. The scent caught him off guard, it had been so long. He walked into the kitchen with a look of surprise and found Yunjoo moving around busily. Kangwook’s expression hardened. He wasn’t pleased to see her doing the very thing she had told him so plainly she wouldn’t do anymore. He had a feeling he knew why.

“What are you doing?”

“You’re up. Sit down.”

“I asked what you’re doing.”

“Can’t you see?”

“I can’t.”

His already tight lips pulled tighter, and his expression went cold.

“I just wanted to say thank you. But I realized there wasn’t much I could do.”

“So you got up early in the morning for this?”

Kangwook felt a sudden surge of anger at her words. His gaze turned cool as he watched her bustling around with her eyes still swollen. It bothered him that this was the kind of relationship they were, one where she felt she had to observe formalities, and it made him even angrier that she was trying to express and repay her gratitude this way.