Is It So Wrong that I Like Seeing the Villain Suffer? - Chapter 7

As Arkle’s breathing became more labored, he stared intently at Lize Allenheim.

“Ugh….”

A painful groan involuntarily escaped his lips.

Lize simply stood there, watching him silently.

“…Saintess.”

“……”

“Won’t you help me?”

Lize still didn’t move.

‘Was it too much to ask?’

Looking at her, Arkle inwardly sneered.

The Allenheim family is known for their merciful saints.

He had thought it was ridiculous from the first time he heard that title.

Arkle believed that even acts done for others were ultimately self-serving.

So when he saw Lize forgiving the servants at the farm earlier….

‘I don’t understand.’

But perhaps because of that, she was surprising.

However, it seemed that even someone like Lize couldn’t extend kindness to the villain who had kidnapped her.

‘I should be grateful if she doesn’t mock me for looking like this in front of her.’

As far as he knew, holy power couldn’t be forcibly activated.

He had to make her use it herself, even if it meant threatening her.

‘Should I speak more forcefully?’

He didn’t want to use rough methods if he could avoid it, but the pain that felt like his whole body was on fire was getting worse.

Frowning, Arkle looked at Lize in front of him and swallowed dryly.

The pain made him feel like his head was going strange.

Even though he knew that holy power couldn’t be forcibly activated, Arkle reached out to Lize. Like he’s trying to grab her.

He didn’t know what he would do after grabbing her, but still, Arkle reached out towards Lize as if she was his only salvation.

‘Just a little closer….’

Just as he was about to grasp Lize’s white wrist,

A warm sensation touched his right cheek.

Lize had cupped his cheek with one hand.

Receiving the mercy finally shown by the Saintess who had been just watching, Arkle quietly looked at her.

“……”

“How is it?”

Lize was looking down at him with a worried expression.

Her ability to eliminate pain just by touching….

“…I’m not sure.”

After hesitating for a moment, Arkle said with a furrowed brow.

“I don’t feel anything. Does it not work on me? Or…”

His unfocused red eyes stared intently at Lize.

Breathing heavily, Arkle’s lips moved.

His deep voice resonated.

“Perhaps touching alone is not enough.”

❖ ❖ ❖

I silently looked at Arkle.

‘…How did he know? That’s right, this alone isn’t enough….’

Lize Allenheim was known to possess holy power that could heal just by touch, but in fact, there was one condition.

Namely, reverence towards the user.

The sick person had to show sincere reverence towards Lize.

Lize had performed numerous good deeds and services before, and her patients sincerely respected her, so she was naturally able to heal.

However, those who didn’t know the detailed conditions spread rumors that Lize had the ability to heal just by touching.

This fact is revealed later through Jean Allenheim’s line when he learns of Lize’s death, “As if holy power would work on you bastards who have no love for humanity anyway…!”

Like he said, sincere reverence… is such a thing even possible for Arkle?

He was an empty person who believed in nothing in this world.

Unlike Martha who was full of ambition or Naran who craved recognition, Arkle desired nothing.

Even the strong power tormenting him now was not something he wanted to have.

To find ‘sincerity’ in such an Arkle….

‘That’s why I couldn’t immediately say I would heal him…!’

I touched Arkle’s cheek just in case, but it seemed that holy power couldn’t be manifested without the conditions being met.

‘If I’m proven useless to Arkle like this, I….’

Just as I swallowed dryly, Arkle let out another faint groan.

“Ugh….”

His face, clenching his teeth, was drenched in cold sweat.

‘Ah.’

A thought flashed through my mind.

‘Respect from the heart is good like in the original work, but… isn’t sincerity not just about that?’

Sincerity doesn’t only come from beautiful things.

Arkle had a stronger emotion than that right now.

‘Desperation.’

I know too, having been in pain for a long time.

How desperate the earnestness born from pain can be.

‘Maybe this is more sincere than respect.’

I slowly opened my mouth.

“Arkle.”

When I carefully called his name, he looked up at me silently.

His forehead was covered in cold sweat, and his face was flushed red, perhaps from the fever.

“I have a request.”

“A request…?”

“You’re in a lot of pain right now, aren’t you?”

“……?”

Arkle, who was quietly looking at me, had a face that seemed to ask why I was asking such a thing.

I thought it was a pointless question too.

Right now, he had a look in his eyes that said he would do anything to forget the pain.

“You want to die rather than endure this, right?”

“……”

“You want to do anything to forget the pain, right?”

“…That’s right.”

“With that feeling, please beg. Ask me to touch you.”

Hearing my words, Arkle looked confused.

“Why are you making such a strange request?”

“There’s a condition to activate the holy power.”

“What is it?”

After thinking for a moment, I decided to be honest.

“You need to show reverence to me. With sincerity from your heart….”

“Ha….”

Arkle gave a short, hollow laugh.

“How strange. Wasn’t holy power supposed to help people unconditionally?”

“You don’t believe in such things anyway.”

“……”

“Don’t you know best that there’s no such thing as an ability without conditions in this world?”

He quietly looked at me.

“…Haha.”

And laughed softly.

“You really are a strange saintess.”

“I told you I’m not a saintess.”

A woman as wicked as me being called a saintess would anger God.

“So what will you do?”

“……”

“You can’t force healing, you know.”

“…Right.”

“Really?!”

“I just need to beg, right?”

“Yes…!”

“Alright.”

After looking at me for a moment, Arkle turned his gaze away.

“……”

“……”

“Hurry up.”

“…Wait.”

“Do you have to use formal speech?”

“…I got it.”

“……”

“……”

With his face flushed red, Arkle muttered in a low voice.

“…Please… touch me.”

“……”

On the outside, I was looking at him with a serious face, but in reality, I was barely holding onto my sanity.

‘This is crazy. Really crazy. I think I’ve gone mad.’

Seeing Arkle asking to be touched, my mind was already not in its right state.

I was desperately trying to keep my facial expression in check to avoid making a strange face.

True to my perverse tastes, I… can’t resist the weak appearance of a handsome man.

The vulnerable face of a good-looking man is always thrilling….

The reason <Red Moon> became my favorite novel was… to be honest, largely due to the constantly struggling male protagonist.

In that sense, Arkle’s appearance just now was….

His slightly furrowed brow, his flushed face, his sweet voice that gave a pitiful impression….

‘To think such a big man could look so pitiful.’

Not to mention, begging while using formal speech… I was grateful to the god who set such a restriction.

‘I thought it was a picky condition, but I take it back. Of course he should show reverence.’

“Is this enough now, Saintess?”

I nodded while pressing my chest with one hand.

Now it’s my turn to keep the promise.

“……”

‘Will it work…?’

My eyes met Arkle’s in mid-air.

His face was still flushed red.

“……”

“……”

‘He’s beautiful.’

I carefully reached out and gently cupped Arkle’s right cheek once again.

‘Is it working…?’

I couldn’t tell as there was no change in his expression.

I carefully cupped his left cheek with my other hand.

“How is it?”

My heart was still pounding.

“……”

Arkle slowly closed and opened his red eyes.

“It’s good….”

‘……!’

With his cheeks slightly pressed by my hands, Arkle smiled.

Unlike before, it wasn’t a forced smile to endure the pain, but a genuine smile that naturally flowed out.

Arkle, who had been looking at me as if entranced, opened his mouth.

“Are you… perhaps an angel?”

“An angel?”

“I thought I was going to go crazy… but the pain is gone.”

It seems to be working.

‘Holy power really is an amazing force.’

Arkle’s erratic breathing had calmed down.

In just a few seconds, he looked much more comfortable.

Just as I was about to gently remove my hands, Arkle grabbed my wrists.

“No.”

“……”

“Just a little longer.”

His voice was firm, but there was a hint of desperation.

“Just like this… for a little longer.”

“I guess I have no choice.”

I smiled softly and placed my hands on his cheeks again.

We stayed still like that for a while.

❖ ❖ ❖

A while later, Arkle stood up, saying he had something to do.

As he tidied up his disheveled appearance, he said,

“I’ve called my aide. He will escort you to your room.”

I quietly watched his back.

The pitiful look from earlier had completely disappeared from him, who was now speaking indifferently as if he had never been in pain.

The atmosphere had changed so much that I wondered if I had hallucinated.

I followed behind him with a hollow gaze.

‘It’s frustrating….’

To be honest, his face asking me to touch him wouldn’t leave my mind.

‘I want to see more.’

While all the characters in <Red Moon> had their fair share of struggles, the male protagonist, Jean Allenheim, undoubtedly struggled the most.

‘He infiltrated the Duke’s family and had no peace, mentally or physically.’

It might be a cruel thing to say about the male lead, but readers were thrilled by that. It seems Jean’s reactions stimulated the perverted minds of people like me.

The male protagonist who constantly struggled, sometimes getting angry, sometimes begging, and sometimes even showing tears.

‘I’m the same, all the readers of <Red Moon> must be weird people.’

In contrast, Arkle Cayenne consistently maintained an indifferent attitude except for times like this when magical resonance struck.

The empty man who possessed the strongest power in the world but was interested in nothing.

But today I realized.

“Please… touch me.”

This man needs to struggle.

With that body and that face, how wasteful would it be to only show an expressionless face?

‘Struggle more, struggle harder!’

As I was shooting burning gazes at Arkle’s back, he turned around.

I flinched involuntarily.

His red eyes looked at me intently and asked.

“What are you thinking about?”