Chapter 4 (Part 5)

“Commander, you wash up alone. I’ll run back to the mansion.”

“It’s dangerous to go out now. How do you expect to reach the mansion when you can’t see ahead?”

“I’m not a child. What does it matter if I get hurt or not? Ah! Are you worried that my father will scold you? Don’t worry. I’ll say I never met you today.”

Reina immediately turned to leave the bathroom. But Patrick grabbed her hand.

“Leave when the weather calms down.”

As Reina threw a tantrum, Patrick lifted her and placed her on his shoulder.

“No, I’m leaving now. Let me go!”

“You need time to cool your head.”

Dangling upside down, Reina hit and pinched Patrick’s back, struggling. But he didn’t seem to have any intention of putting her down. He seemed to be waiting for her agitation to subside.

No matter how much she fussed, he remained unmoved, so Reina changed her strategy. She twisted her body and blew on the back of his neck.

Even with the considerable distance, her hot breath reached him.

This time, Patrick let out a shallow sigh. But that was all. He still didn’t put her down.

Reina then poked a spot on his neck with her hand. She felt Patrick’s body flinch momentarily, even though he had been unresponsive before.

Is his neck a weak spot?

As she wondered where to poke next, Patrick put her down on the floor. Standing face to face with him, she was about to smile victoriously.

But before she could, Patrick lowered his gaze and remained silent. It wasn’t the time for jokes, so Reina’s slightly shaky eyes turned to him.

Looking as if he had made a decision, Patrick raised his head. Then he placed his hands on her shoulders and spoke.

“You are the problem. Do you know how much your existence confuses me?”

His eyes, looking down at her, were filled with confusion.

What does that mean? Why does my existence confuse him?

As vague doubts arose, Patrick continued.

“You drive me crazy every time. Ever since that day.”

Eyes resembling the freshness of spring were soon swallowed by darkness. Eyes filled with desire glinted.

“What….”

That day? Could there have been an incident that left him completely bewildered? 

Reina pondered over the times she had spent with Patrick.

Whenever she caused trouble, it was Patrick who cleaned up the mess, but that was before he became the commander of the knights.

For the past two years, Ford, the deputy commander, had been in charge of Reina, so there hadn’t been any recent incidents involving Patrick.

Oh, could he be talking about that day in my father’s study?

Since receiving the talisman from Richelle, strange things had happened. The only recent incident she could think of was what happened in the study. The day she held something she had only imagined.

She hadn’t touched it for long. At most, ten seconds.  

Could such a short time really shake Patrick’s heart?

No matter how much she thought about it, it didn’t make sense. She didn’t do it on purpose; it was just a mistake, and she had even apologized.

As various thoughts tangled in her mind, Patrick said something unexpected.

“The day you spied on my body at the hot spring… since then, you’ve been on my mind constantly.”

“You knew?”

Reina’s eyes widened like a rabbit’s.

“How could I not sense your presence?”

Oh my goodness.

Reina’s face flushed with embarrassment.

Could that eerie gaze I felt back then have been from Commander Patrick?

Come to think of it, if it were Patrick, he wouldn’t have missed even the slightest presence. His heightened senses and sensitivity were part of what made him the commander of the knights.

She couldn’t blame him for not mentioning it sooner. It would have been difficult for him to accuse her of spying on him at the hot spring, so it was natural for him to pretend not to know.

She felt like she wanted to hide in a hole. But before that, she needed to explain. Otherwise, he might think she was a pervert who spied on n*ked men.

“I-it wasn’t on purpose. I was just curious because you all kept hiding things from me and going somewhere as a group. If I had known you were going to the hot spring, I would never have followed secretly.”

“I understand.”

So, he didn’t misunderstand? That’s a relief, but what exactly is driving him crazy?

Reina couldn’t understand what Patrick meant. As a result, her gaze on him grew narrower.

She cautiously opened her mouth while observing Patrick.

“Then what has been bothering you…?”

“Why are you putting me through this trial? I always thought of you as a cute little sister because I don’t have one…. Haa.”

Instead of an answer, a deep sigh escaped Patrick’s lips.

Like a little sister?

It was a heavy statement, but it sounded as if he was saying it wasn’t the case anymore. 

Or was that just my imagination?

“Do you not feel that way now?”

“How could I feel like you are my sister when we are not actually family?”

Patrick deflected the question.

He wasn’t wrong, but since he rarely gave ambiguous answers, Reina found it hard to interpret his meaning.

A moment of silence passed, and then Patrick spoke again, surprising her.

“I thought you had feelings for me.”

Did he notice?

Reina’s eyes widened even more. She knew Patrick was perceptive, but she hadn’t expected him to know her feelings.

Her heart pounded like a drum. She couldn’t even tell if she was breathing properly.

“At first, I didn’t know how to take it.”

At that moment, Patrick took her hand and guided it to his lower body. It was larger and hotter than when she had touched it before.

“Eek!”

Startled, Reina quickly withdrew her hand. Patrick chuckled at her reaction.

“Did you think I wouldn’t notice you looking at me with those covetous eyes? Your innocent-looking eyes were fixed on my lower body, and it bothered me so much. I had to suppress my rising desire multiple times.”

So he knew…. 

Reina’s face turned beet red in an instant. A wave of shame washed over her.

Was I that obvious?

She had tried hard not to show it, so the other knights hadn’t noticed. But Patrick, being who he was, had figured it out.

“Ah, um, that’s….”

She was so flustered that she didn’t know what to say. Admitting it would make her seem like a pervert, but denying it felt like lying. She couldn’t find the words to refute him.

“It was confusing. It seemed like you liked my body.”

Patrick said with a troubled expression.

I thought I was the only one feeling confused.

Seeing his eyes full of anguish, she realized he had been struggling with similar feelings. But that didn’t make the shame any less.

She couldn’t find a way to refute him. She liked Patrick, but she also liked his body.

“It seems I wasn’t wrong.”

With no response from her, Patrick sighed deeply and grabbed her wrist. Then he placed her hand back on his manhood.

“Feel free to touch it as much as you want. Don’t worry about my reaction.”

“N-no. I didn’t mean to….”

Flustered, Reina struggled, but she couldn’t overcome his strength. It was even bigger than before.

“If touching it with your hand isn’t enough, would you like to taste it? Or have you lost interest?”

“What?”

“You’ve been avoiding me lately. Are you trying to distance yourself because you’ve lost interest in me?”

This time, his eyes were filled with resentment as he looked at her. She avoided his gaze, feeling unable to face him.

Instead, she nodded. She hadn’t lost interest, but she had been deliberately avoiding him.

“Damn it!”

A curse escaped Patrick’s lips. She had never seen him act this way before, not even in front of the other knights, so she was taken aback.

“Why….”

Patrick bit his lower lip.

Isn’t it natural to avoid him after learning about his fiancée? He admitted he had a fiancée of five years, so why is he acting as if she doesn’t exist?

Reina couldn’t understand Patrick’s actions.

When Patrick saw the look of confusion in Reina’s eyes, he sighed deeply once more.

He had never intended to show his rough side to Reina. He always aimed to present himself as composed and noble.

But the moment he confirmed that she had grown to dislike him, he couldn’t maintain that facade any longer.

It was always like this. Whenever Reina was around, he lost his self-control and his emotions slipped out without him realizing it.

Just like now.

“Do you know how maddening it was for me when I saw that gaze directed at others instead of me?”

And finally, he let those feelings slip out.