VIII. Unchanging Friendship

A peaceful scene. Opal-like sparkles of light shattered on the calm river water.

It was a mesmerizing sight, but Estelle’s eyes took in none of it. Now that the moment to reveal the truth to Jeff had arrived, tension stiffened her spine, making her movements rigid.

Estelle fiddled with her sleeve that reached down to the back of her hand as she composed herself. She needed to explain calmly and persuade him to believe her words.

Though she thought she had already half given up, anxiety constricted her breathing. Her heart pounded so hard before she could even confess to Jeff that she felt she might ruin everything.

‘Maybe… I shouldn’t say anything.’

As her lips trembled violently with intense nervousness, Estelle just wanted to avoid this situation altogether.

‘No, I’ve already said all sorts of things like a deranged woman… Whether I continue or not, the fact that Jeff sees me as a crazy woman won’t change.’

Estelle steeled her resolve. After taking a deep breath, the trembling seemed to subside a little.

She habitually glanced around to gauge the distance between herself and the river. Since death was merely a new beginning for her, she was prepared to end her life if things took a turn for the worst.

‘This would be my first time dying from embarrassment……’

“Lady Arcis.”

Jeff, who had been quietly following behind Estelle, called her with a serious expression, perhaps sensing something unusual in her demeanor.

“……”

Estelle stopped walking and turned her head. Her face appeared calm at a glance, but the air around them was extremely tense.

“Your Highness… what I’m about to tell you might sound a bit strange. No, it will sound like madness.”

Jeff’s gaze fell upon her pitiful hands, which had turned white from the pressure she was exerting, causing her bones to protrude. He looked at her with kind eyes, as if trying to give her courage.

Feeling her heart pounding anxiously, Estelle bit her lip before painfully forcing out words again.

“I… have the special ability to turn back time. I’ve lived through a future that hasn’t happened yet.”

“……”

When Jeff’s eyes twisted, Estelle felt nauseous and had the urge to vomit right there. How fantastical her story must sound…… She was so embarrassed by her own words that she wanted to bury her face in a mouse hole if one existed.

“It’s… an ability that developed after I touched the holy relic of House Herais. I… experienced terrible things and didn’t want to live that way again……”

Perhaps due to her nervousness, Estelle’s voice rose by a tone, going off-key. A completely unconvincing, ridiculous tone.

Estelle just wanted to cry. Even to her, it sounded like nonsensical babbling from someone lacking something, which would be difficult to find credible.

“Not everything… um… I can somewhat predict events that will happen in the future. If it’s hard to believe right now… well, I don’t remember everything perfectly either. Since I died multiple times trying to access the holy relic in the imperial palace… this is the second time I’ve had a meal with Your Highness like this……”

It was ruined. Estelle imagined Jeff immediately sending her to a sanatorium for the mentally ill. Unable to speak further, she hung her head low.

She feared meeting Jeff’s gaze again. He must surely be looking at her as if she were insane.

“……”

A moist breeze passed by, caressing their hair. After a long silence with no response, Estelle straightened her hunched shoulders and gently raised her head.

As expected, Jeff was looking at her. However, his handsome face showed no mockery or ridicule.

Just that fact alone was so reassuring. The courage that had disappeared from Estelle’s heart bloomed again.

“It sounds like… a lie, doesn’t it?”

“……”

After a heavy silence, Jeff quietly shook his head.

“…No.”

“You don’t… think I’m crazy?”

“I don’t think so. I believe what you say, Lady Arcis.”

Looking at his honest eyes, Estelle felt suppressed emotions rising to the tip of her throat.

“Why……”

“Well… because you look at me sincerely.”

The special ability of House Alexis was the power to control the minds of living beings. Compared to other Guardians with their flashy offensive abilities, it was sinister and secretive.

The Guardians blessed by the goddess were objects of reverence to people, but no one welcomed the ability of House Alexis that could peer into their hidden desires.

Jeff considered being born into such a family a curse.

“I think I’m no different from the monsters in the Black Forest. No one has ever looked at me without prejudice like you do, Lady Arcis. Even my longtime friends show caution… but you didn’t. Even my parents fear me.”

Jeff remembered the last day of his grandfather, who had looked at him with pitying eyes for inheriting a special ability.

His grandfather, called the Iron Duke, had enjoyed long-standing glory, but on the day he ended his life in his room, he looked more shabby and lonely than anyone else.

Jeff thought he understood his grandfather’s feelings. The special ability was a curse disguised as a blessing.

“Having everyone look at me that way… it’s harder than I expected.”

“……”

“I understand their fear. Your reaction is special. So… I kept thinking about that brief meeting.”

“……”

“Perhaps… in the past you lived, we were close?”

Estelle kept her lips tightly closed and nodded her head vigorously. Her silver hair rippled like the surface of the river with her nod.

“Despite the fact that I’m still someone with the special ability to control minds, you look at me consistently. I don’t think someone like you would lie to me. And……”

Jeff smiled refreshingly like the blowing wind, filled with conviction.

“Your eyes shine like jewels, Lady Arcis, making me feel your sincerity.”

“Ah……”

[Your eyes are like jewels. Jewels that no one else could dare to obtain….. Just like your existence.]

As his past words echoed in her ears like tinnitus, her purple eyes became moist as if about to spill tears.

[To my eyes, you shine brighter than jewels. So have confidence. You’re such a lovable person.]

Jeff Alexis. He was someone who could soothe Estelle’s wounds better than she could herself, and a dear friend who had always reached out his hand whenever she fell into despair.

His numerous comforts and encouragements became the strength that firmly supported Estelle’s fragile heart. He was her one and only lovely friend. And he was still someone who showed her trust.

When teardrops finally fell from Estelle’s eyes, Jeff was startled and flustered.

“Ah, Lady Arcis?”

“Sob……”

Estelle had been exhausted by countless deaths. The burden on her shoulders without a goal was too heavy, and the secret she couldn’t tell anyone hung on the tip of her tongue like a pendulum.

Estelle desperately needed it. That kindness that gave unconditional trust, she had missed it so painfully.

“Wait, please calm down……”

As Jeff awkwardly gestured, unable to touch a lady’s body carelessly, Estelle burst into tears.

“……!”

She embraced Jeff’s waist as he was about to take out his handkerchief. She had no idea how much she had longed for this warm embrace.

“Uh……”

Perhaps too surprised, Jeff’s body stiffened like a stone.

“Jeff, Jeff……”

Estelle whispered in a sobbing voice. The kindness from the past had found her in this new world where she felt all alone.

“Thank you, thank you… for believing me……”

His refreshing scent, like a summer forest about to arrive, penetrated deep into her lungs. It was a familiar body scent that comforted her tired heart.

“Um… hmm.”

At Estelle’s intense reaction, Jeff raised the fine hairs around his neck. He knew he should move her away, considering she had lost her reason, but his hands hovered in the air, unable to touch her trembling shoulders. He didn’t dislike this discomfort that tightened his solar plexus.

After holding her for quite some time in an extremely unnatural posture, Jeff looked around and cleared his throat.

“Are you… feeling a bit calmer now?”

Estelle, who had been nestled in his arms, raised her head.

“Yes……”

Jeff looked down at her with an affectionate gaze. He wanted to rub her reddened eyes that still held welling tears. But he only twitched his hand, afraid of startling her.

“I’d like to talk more… but I think we need to move elsewhere first……”

The area around them had become crowded with people who recognized them and gathered. Seeing the chaotic crowd, Jeff made a troubled expression. The distance to the carriage was too great to simply ignore them and move on.

He didn’t want to throw her vulnerable appearance to the crowd as a spectacle. Jeff, having made a decision, took off his coat and placed it over Estelle’s head.

“Excuse me.”

“What……”

Jeff lowered his upper body and suddenly slipped his hands under Estelle’s waist and knees, then lifted her up.

“Ah!”

Startled, Estelle reflexively struggled, but Jeff whispered softly.

“Cover your face. There are too many watching eyes.”

“……”

So it was a consideration. Estelle felt the embarrassment she had forgotten rushing back. She could tell how much of a mess her face must be without looking in a mirror. She tightly wrapped Jeff’s coat around herself. With her face buried in it, not even a strand of Estelle’s hair was visible.

‘I’m not alone anymore…..’

Feeling the swaying as he walked with long strides, she rested her head against Jeff’s chest and smiled. She felt like she could overcome anything with him.

That’s the certainty she felt.

* * *

A man riding a black horse headed somewhere alone, raising dust. The cloak he wore had a valiant black-scaled dragon embroidered on it, allowing one to infer his identity.