‘D*mn. What was I saying to someone who’s still ill…’

Slowly, Lucian’s pale fingers, still carrying a trace of cold, lifted the damp hair from Heliones’s forehead. At the unfamiliar touch, Heliones looked up at her.

“Haha.”

Lucian laughed when her eyes met his. It was a faint smile, nearly soundless, but the corners of her eyes curved unmistakably, a genuinely felt smile he had not seen in a very long time.

“Why are you laughing?”

At Heliones’s question, the corners of Lucian’s eyes curved even more, and her lips parted just enough to show the edges of her front teeth.

“Crybaby.”

“!!”

He had thought he wiped away all his tears before she woke. What was she talking about? Flustered, Heliones quickly touched the corners of his eyes, but they were dry, just as he expected.

“When did I ever…”

Heliones had been about to tell a small white lie and deny having cried at all, but he stopped himself. Lucian’s eyelids had closed again, and her breathing had settled into a steady rhythm.

Just before dawn, the dim space lit by a single lamp in the deep darkness was utterly still. The only thing breaking the silence was the deep, even sound of Lucian’s breathing.

Lucian was still pale enough to seem on the verge of fading away, clearly a patient in every sense, yet in that moment there was somehow a calm about the corners of her lips and eyes that he had never seen in her before.

Heliones considered calling for a physician, but soon let the thought go.

Nothing was happening. The present, passing by without event, felt inexplicably and helplessly precious, and so he simply stood still and quietly listened to the sound of Lucian breathing.

* * *

Has the sun not risen yet?

No. Looking more carefully, the curtains were simply drawn, and through the gaps, fierce sunlight left deep traces of brightness among the shadows.

My head is splitting. I remember collapsing in the courtroom, but after that…

Ah, Heliones! Right. I think I woke up briefly at some point. He was sitting beside me.

It might have been a dream. His face had been filled with a fear and hesitation I had never seen in him before. Right. It was probably a dream.

Throb. The wound aches. The pain medication must have worn off. Even so, I cannot go on imposing on the imperial palace indefinitely. I need to come to my senses and get back to my lodgings.

It was clearly summer, yet I felt a chill, and when I looked around, I noticed what was probably Heliones’s summer jacket.

So it was not a dream?

Then I had even less reason to stay. I was someone who would become a complete stranger once the paperwork was finalized. Now that Lewian’s survival had come to light, my presence in the imperial palace would place far too great a political burden on Heliones.

I sorted through my thoughts with a mind that refused to work properly, then forced my uncooperative body into motion and pushed myself upright. I had not even left the bed yet, and my stomach was already turning. What was this? Reduced to this state over a single laceration. Was age really catching up with me?

I was barely managing to settle my stomach when the door opened and Heliones appeared, looking somewhat tired. The faint shadows under his eyes told me he had been up all night.

What a kind man.

“You’re awake?”

“Yes.”

Heliones gave a small nod at my answer, then poured water from the teapot sitting beside the bed and held it out to me. My throat happened to be parched, so I took the cup straight from his hand and wet my lips.

It was cold. Such cold water in this season. Either it had not been sitting there long, or he had kept replacing it with fresh water while waiting for me to wake.

“I’ve been a burden.”

There was no greater imposition than this. A former wife who was now a complete stranger. With no children between us, there should have been nothing left to bind us for the rest of our lives.

“Please don’t say that. I am simply glad you are safe.”

At the word burden, Heliones’s composed brow creased slightly, as though in pain.

The divorce had been finalized before the trial even began. He had publicly declared that he and I were complete strangers, so why was this man still worrying over me like this? What meaning had he assigned to those two dry, uneventful years we spent as family?

“Thank you for your concern. I am all right now.”

“You still need to rest. Please stay a little longer. I will send for a physician right away.”

Going to fetch a physician himself was a trivial task for an Emperor. But there was not even a maid in the bedroom to attend to things, so he stepped outside the door himself and gave the order to summon one.

The imperial physician must have been waiting nearby, because he arrived shortly. The middle-aged man examined me from various angles, let out a small sigh, and delivered his diagnosis.

“You need complete rest. The surface wound has closed, but your body is too weak and there is a risk of infection. You will need to pay close attention to hygiene and diet for the time being.”

“Yes. Thank you.”

I know my own body better than anyone. This was nothing. The diagnosis was a little excessive.

I had not died when fever burned hot enough to feel like my head was melting, or when stomach pain was bad enough to feel like my insides were tearing apart. People do not die so easily. Especially this useless body of mine, stubbornly clinging to life for no good reason.

Even so, I said nothing and simply nodded to the physician in thanks.

Even if I had no particular desire to cling to life, I could not help but feel grateful to the people who had saved it.

After the physician left, I had recovered enough of my senses to push myself up and prepare to return to my lodgings.

“You’re welcome to stay longer.”

“No. I can move well enough now. It’s time I went back.”

I had risen and was about to leave when a piece of unfinished business came to mind, and I stopped for a moment.

“I will return to where I’ve been staying.”

The divorce paperwork had been properly handled, so there was no reason to remain in the capital. And now that Lewian’s survival had been revealed, I had made it publicly clear that I had no connection to him whatsoever, which was all the more reason to go. If something came up later and suspicion fell on me, I could be investigated then. I had nothing to hide.

“I have imposed on you greatly. You watched over me so carefully during my time in the capital, and even when troublesome matters arose, you saw everything through to the end. I am truly and sincerely grateful.”

I put my whole heart into the words and bowed deeply at the waist. For a moment my head rang and I nearly lost my balance, but some inexplicable stubbornness, a refusal to show any more weakness in front of Heliones, held my body upright.

“No.”

“?”

A sharp answer that came back before I had even fully raised my head.

“Pardon?”

“Leaving the capital is not possible for the time being.”

What was this supposed to mean? I had stayed in the capital without complaint until the paperwork was settled, just as he needed, and now he was telling me I could not leave?

I had been quietly looking forward to finally escaping this wretched capital, and without meaning to, I narrowed my eyes and fixed Heliones with a glare.

Heliones had refused my request with a firm expression, but when he met my gaze, he seemed to waver for just a moment, his body giving a slight flinch. He quickly returned to that resolute face, however, and stated his refusal once more.

“Lewian is preparing for Rodencia’s revival. It appears he has already made contact with his followers. There has been a tip.”

“Ah.”

This was a problem. I had already heard of his survival. But Lewian was a defeated commander who had fled the battlefield. I had assumed that even if he were alive, his influence would be limited, yet he still had followers? What exactly was the power of a divine beast capable of?

I had been too naive. If he was not merely on the run but was genuinely planning a revolt, denying any connection to him in a courtroom would not be enough to put the matter to rest.

“Miss Lucian is currently under close surveillance. Wherever you go, assassins or those seeking to recruit you will approach. Staying in the capital makes it easier to provide protection.”

My head ached. My hand moved on its own and pressed against my forehead. Assassins would at least be manageable, but if I were captured by remnants of the Rodencian royal restoration movement, I could become a hostage. I had no idea whether I held that kind of value to them.

It was suffocating. The feeling of a dry, dense loaf of bread lodged in my throat. The royal family had fallen, I had become a divorcee, I belonged nowhere, and yet the past still held me and refused to let go.

But more than that, I could not bear to face Heliones.

My existence was clearly a liability to him. It would have been better, perhaps even more helpful, if Delmir had simply finished me off then and there.

To the end, whether as family or as a stranger, I was of no use to him whatsoever.

The small rush of triumph I had felt in the courtroom began to fade. Right. From the very beginning, my very existence had been a curse.

“Understood. I will remain in the capital until I receive further word. I will impose on you a little longer.”

I kept my head bowed low to hide the wretchedness I felt, and answered with quiet deference.

No reply came from Heliones. Something I could not contain welled up inside me, and rudely, without waiting for the Emperor’s leave, I turned and walked away from him.