Late that night, Elren escorted me discreetly to the imperial palace. In the middle of a familiar, fragrant red sea, Heliones stood calmly, waiting for me.

Even I thought my proposal was rather bold, so I had been anxious about how he would react, but the face that greeted me was more composed than I had expected.

“I heard the proposal you sent through Elren.”

“Yes.”

No matter how I thought about it, that was about all I could do. But from Heliones’s perspective, it was possible that having me step forward, a mere ex-wife, would be unwelcome.

“Will you be all right?”

But he was the one asking if I would be all right, so I returned the question with a faint smile.

“If it is all right with Your Majesty.”

Heliones moistened his dry lips for a moment, seeming to choose his words, then asked with a troubled expression.

“You hated having it seen, didn’t you? Even mentioned.”

We had been a married couple with neither a real marriage nor real conversation, but he could not have failed to notice. No matter how hot the day, I always insisted on dresses that covered my neck and back, and I startled easily whenever anyone caught a glimpse of my body, and the sight of fire or blades was enough to set me trembling.

Ah, come to think of it, I didn’t tremble at all when I was putting out the fire earlier.

“I hated anyone knowing. Or rather, it was more that it hadn’t healed enough to even put into words.”

“Has it healed a little now?”

“Yes. It still hurts, but it’s healed enough to talk about. Earlier, I was fine even with fire right in front of me. I’m not sure whether it was just because things were urgent.”

“Then I’m truly glad. But even so… if it still hurts, there’s no reason to go out of your way to reopen the wound.”

Heliones spoke with a fairly serious expression, his tone firm, as though he were about to reject my request.

“You heard what happened today?”

“Yes.”

“Staying still doesn’t make it heal faster. Once the bleeding stops, you have to disinfect it and let it breathe before a scab can form.”

“It won’t be easy. People who direct their resentment toward Lewian onto you will come in droves.”

“You faced Lewian directly on the battlefield, didn’t you?”

My question came somewhat out of nowhere, and Heliones’s expression twisted into one of discomfort, the look of someone who had bitten into a rotten plum.

“You don’t need to make that face. I’m not here to reproach you for destroying my homeland.”

Even after my explanation, Heliones twitched the muscles in his jaw and let his eyes drift around the room, unable to find a place to rest them.

“My father was the kind of man who burned people alive when he was angry. Even the late Count Belzen, the father of my former husband, Count Belzen, was burned alive on nothing more than circumstantial evidence of aiding a rebellion.”

The moment Count Belzen’s name left my lips, Heliones grew even more agitated than before and began breathing roughly.

“Lewian and my stepmother mostly dealt with me. They tortured me with heated brands, needles, sharp blades, water, blunt objects, all sorts of things.”

Heliones finally sank into his chair as though his legs had given out, and pressed his dry hands over his face.

“I love my homeland, but my family are people who should never have been allowed to rule. I’ve heard that Rodencia is now governed jointly by the victorious nations, with leaders chosen by vote. I think that is actually better for Rodencia. At least it means no more suffering through pointless wars of conquest.”

“I’ve been taking special care to ensure that ordinary people are not harmed.”

Heliones, still seated, buried his face in his hands. He still seemed to feel sorry for destroying my homeland, or rather, my family line.

“I spent my whole life being called the shame of the royal family, the harbinger of ruin, the lineage of a curse, the severing of the divine. My family tortured me and I lived in pain, unable to do anything. I don’t really know whether I truly am the being from the prophecy, or whether Rodencia fell because of me. But at least now there is something I can do. If people believe that is what I am, then I will become that. I want to do what I can as the cursed royal who fulfilled Rodencia’s prophecy.”

Heliones sat without moving. His face was still buried in his palms, and not being able to read his expression was frustrating.

After some time had passed, a dry voice slowly came from Heliones’s lips, which had been silent for so long.

“Is this because of me? Are you trying to ease my political burden?”

His shoulders, rigid as stone, began to tremble slightly. You have nothing to be sorry to me for. Without realizing it, my feet carried me toward Heliones. I quietly placed my hand on his trembling shoulder.

“I wanted to die every day. I can’t begin to count how many times I thought about just ending it, when no matter how loudly I cried out no one listened, and no matter how hard I struggled I couldn’t break free. Until not long ago, I was someone who went on living only because I couldn’t bring myself to die.”

Pat, pat. I still couldn’t read his expression, but his shoulders were trembling more severely, so I wrapped my arm gently around him and continued.

“If I had to say, then yes, it is because of Your Majesty. Though not only because of you.”

Heliones, who had been keeping his head bowed the whole time, lifted his eyes at once and looked up at me.

The corners of his eyes are red, just as I thought. He really is a good person.

“Not only because of me. What do you mean by that? Who else is there?”

Heliones looked up at me with a slight huff, and the look on his face was so endearing, like a child who had just had a friend taken away, that a laugh escaped me before I could stop it. Even a beautiful man’s sulking is a sight for the eyes.

“There’s Hanna, and Elren, and Lady Elise.”

“Ah.”

Heliones let out a dazed sound at my answer and let his mouth fall open. Even his face, usually refined yet carrying a certain gravity, could make an expression like that.

It had been a long time since I felt my lips pulling up past my cheekbones. This must be exactly what people mean when they say they can’t hold back a smile.

Whatever misunderstanding he had drawn from my words, Heliones flushed red and looked flustered, but he didn’t turn away and kept his gaze on me.

“I’m not sure what you misunderstood, but… don’t worry. I have no intention of marrying again. I’ve finally reached a point where no one else’s name is attached to mine. I like where I am now. I don’t need a third time.”

This is the truth. I want no more political marriages. I’m nothing but an ordinary commoner now, with no political value, but I want to live simply as myself. Not as someone’s Lucian.

At my answer, the corners of Heliones’s sharp eyes creased slightly.

“Who would want to be with a woman in her late twenties who has been divorced twice and cannot bear children? And it’s not that I want to avoid being a burden to Your Majesty. I simply prefer being on my own, so please don’t give it another thought.”

Please don’t feel sorry for my situation. Just find a kind and virtuous woman and build a good life together. Don’t hold onto any pity for me. Move forward.

“I have never once in my life thought ‘I mustn’t die for someone else’s sake.’ But lately, when I imagine dying, the faces of people who would grieve come to mind. Your Majesty is among them, aren’t you?”

At my words, Heliones gave a vigorous nod, his gaze still fixed on me.

“I no longer want to neglect myself the way I used to. Not just letting things fall where they may, but doing what I can. I will stand before those who still worship the divine beasts and declare it plainly. That the divine has been severed through me. That Rodencia has fallen as the prophecy foretold, and it cannot rise again.”

Whether my words, spoken with conviction, came across as genuine, Heliones no longer offered any reasons why it couldn’t be done. He simply gazed up at me and wore a twisted smile that was difficult to tell apart from crying or laughing.

In that moment, I caught sight of his grey eyes, still shining with a mysterious light that no number of battlefields had managed to extinguish, reflecting my own eyes full of concern, and I came back to my senses.

“Oh goodness. What am I doing.”

There could be no greater impropriety than this. Standing upright before a seated emperor and patting him on the back. Who do I think I am? I’ve lost my mind, truly lost it. Did anyone see? Did the guards see? What was I thinking? Lucian!

Cursing my own thoughtlessness, I quickly stepped back from Heliones and bowed my head deeply.

“I apologize. You seemed weighed down with thoughts on my account, and I thought to offer some comfort, but I overstepped.”

Saying too much is always a losing game. I’m not usually one to talk much, but of all places, I had gone on and on in front of Heliones and ended up making a mistake like this. How embarrassing.

“It’s all right. Please don’t worry about it. If anything, I… I…”

I sensed Heliones trying to say something, then stopping himself and hesitating.

“I’m also sorry for rambling on my own like that. I should have listened to what Your Majesty had to say first, but I just went on about my own thoughts.”

At this rate, becoming easy friends is out of the question. Having had almost no real relationships in my life, I find it very difficult to gauge the distance between people. When someone draws close, an unbearable fear makes me push them away, and yet when I am the one drawing close, I have no idea where the line is that I should stop at.