Chapter 28

“Just seeing you glare at me makes me want to do this so badly.”

“Hey, you jerk!”

Eunjae threw the gum container at Wooseok’s chest, then opened the car door and got out. She could see him laughing in the car. Eunjae let out a dry laugh herself. What was she doing? Wooseok was right, too. Even if she got out at the convenience store and walked, could she really hide the way they looked at each other? Not even she was sure.

Even if she went to work after a restless night, Hakyung would notice her condition right away. She was sharp—every office romance got caught in her radar. Eunjae sometimes wondered if Hakyung had some sixth sense. When asked how she knew, Hakyung would answer with just one word.

‘Eyes.’

That’s all she needed.

Eunjae looked back at Wooseok, who hadn’t driven off yet. He leaned against the steering wheel, gazing at her with eyes full of honey. How could she hide that? If she did, she’d probably feel even more hurt.

If they got caught, so be it. Eunjae thought that was enough. She didn’t want to go around announcing they were dating, but she didn’t see any reason to force herself to hide it, either. As she walked step by step, her stride felt lighter and happier than ever.

Wooseok, watching from the car behind, couldn’t stop smiling.

“She acts like she’s hiding, but…”

He muttered to himself as he straightened up to drive. If he was any later, Kiwon would probably start nagging. Just as he took his foot off the brake, his phone rang again. He thought it was Kiwon, but when he checked the screen, it was a name he hadn’t seen in years. The caller was his father.

* * *

“It’s been about five years since we started observing the size, but neither of you knew?”

Faced with the doctor’s question, neither Wooseok nor his father, Gwangho, could answer. All they could do was stare at the screen showing the tumor in his mother’s body. The doctor reassured them that it was a simple surgery.

Thyroid cancer often doesn’t require removal these days, and his mother was one of those cases. The doctor said he was only surprised that she hadn’t told her family. Maybe she hid it so they wouldn’t worry, since it wasn’t serious enough for surgery. The doctor even spoke on her behalf.

Wooseok and Gwangho were still in shock from the sudden situation. When Wooseok answered his father’s call, he’d considered several possibilities, including something about his mother.

They’d had a big argument and parted ways not long ago, so he expected a reaction from his mother—but not this. She’d collapsed while getting water from the fridge during breakfast. His father’s voice was so calm when he told him that Wooseok felt suffocated.

– It’s the hospital. You need to come.

His father delivered the message and hung up. Wooseok explained the situation to Kiwon and rushed to turn the car around. After confirming his mother was asleep in the hospital bed with an IV drip, he met with his father and the doctor. What he heard about his mother’s condition was hard to accept.

“We’ll schedule the surgery soon. Any other questions?”

Neither Wooseok nor his father responded. The doctor nodded and turned to the nurse. Only Wooseok listened to the short instructions. Gwangho silently headed toward the lounge. Seeing his father’s back, Wooseok tried hard not to think of anything else.

After signing as guardian on the surgery consent form, Wooseok left. The hospital was like a factory, giving similar explanations to other guardians. Some had tears in their eyes, others argued with the nurse. People as calm as Wooseok and his father were rare.

Out in the hospital corridor, Wooseok stopped and stood still. Where should he go now? His mind felt frozen. He just wanted a cigarette. After Eunjae’s confession, he’d promised himself never to touch one again. But just days later, his resolve had been reset, and he couldn’t even laugh about it.

Wooseok started walking, planning to buy cigarettes at the convenience store. That’s when he ran into his father coming out of the lounge. Though they were father and son, they looked at each other like strangers.

When had things gotten like this? Why were they so broken, unable to stop hurting each other? He used to agonize over it, but the chronic pain had become so familiar that not touching it was best.

“…What about work?”

Gwangho spoke first.

“I told them.”

“…Okay.”

He turned away, as if he had nothing more to say. Still, every year on his brother’s memorial day, he visited home. That was all the sincerity he could give. Even then, Gwangho never met Wooseok’s eyes. Maybe it had been that way since his brother died.

His mother was easier to deal with. He could be honest with her. There were still feelings left, even if they were anger. She’d at least tried to change him. But his father never interfered in his life—no matter which college he chose, which job, what role he played at work, he never cared.

He only cared about nature. Like a man obsessed with fishing, he spent his days by the river. He never looked back at the pain his wife and child were living through.

“I’ll come back tonight.”

Wooseok spoke to his father’s retreating back. Gwangho paused but moved on like a ghost, wordlessly. Watching his father enter his mother’s hospital room, Wooseok turned away.

Waiting for the elevator, he glanced at his own reflection. It felt like his twenty-year-old self, unable to swallow or spit out his pain, was standing there. A headache came over him, and he closed his eyes for a moment. He missed Eunjae. Shin Eunjae. Thinking of her, Wooseok opened his eyes and stepped into the elevator.

Before putting the cigarette in his mouth, Wooseok took out his phone.

[Where did you go?]

[Is something wrong?]

Messages from Eunjae had already arrived. She must have sent them while he was hearing about his mother’s condition from the doctor. Since he’d dropped her at the convenience store and hadn’t shown up at work, of course she was worried. Wooseok pressed the call button.

“Yes, this is Shin Eunjae.”

Eunjae answered the call in a businesslike tone, as if she was working.

“Where are you?”

Wooseok asked, and Eunjae could be heard quickly moving somewhere, saying, “Just a moment.” Even her hurried breathing was precious to Wooseok. His fingertips tingled; he wanted to catch every single sound.

—I’m following the President to the Sejong site.

It seemed Kiwon had gone down in his place and took Eunjae along.

“Lunch?”

—I’m about to eat now. What about you?

“…Me too.”

Wooseok kept his answer brief. He knew this wasn’t what he needed to say. He should have said what Shin Eunjae was waiting for, but he couldn’t get the words out. He didn’t know how to explain the situation. Where should he start? All he could do was hold his phone.

—…Alright. I should hang up now.

With the noisy sounds of the site in the background, Eunjae’s voice sounded cautious. Wooseok knew he couldn’t say everything right now. He also understood what needed to come first. He kept wondering what the best way was, but in the end, he couldn’t erase his fear. It was a foolish, clumsy love.

“Don’t you have something to say to me?”

—…Huh?

Eunjae’s voice sounded dazed, expecting the call to end.

“You know, the things couples say to each other.”

A playful smile crept onto Wooseok’s lips.

—Hey, what are you talking about? I can barely hear you at the site.

Eunjae hurriedly made excuses. It was strange to try something she’d never done before. Still, why did Wooseok want to tease her? Even after her confession, he wanted confirmation, unable to quiet his childish heart. Wooseok fiddled with a cigarette, then put it in his mouth.

“Alright. Do your work well.”

When he let it go, Eunjae answered right away.

—Okay. You too.

“Yeah.”

—…Seok!

Just as Wooseok was about to put down his phone, Eunjae called his name and paused. The site was still noisy, but Wooseok felt like he could only hear her breathing. She sounded nervous, hesitant, as if she was trying to muster courage.

—Sa, um… I love you.

“…”

—I’m hanging up. Bye.

Before he could answer, the call ended. Wooseok stood there, staring blankly at his disconnected phone. After a long moment, he took the cigarette from his mouth and crushed it in his hand. He didn’t need nicotine anymore. Eunjae’s sweet words were healing enough. His heart was perfectly recharged.