“……Commander.”

Alkaid didn’t look back at Spica. The atmosphere was different from usual when he would appear and help whenever needed, whether she called him or not.

But the hand that held hers loosely enough that she could pull away anytime remained the same.

Rather, that was why. Why Spica followed Alkaid of her own will without resisting.

“Please come in.”

The place where Alkaid opened the door to was a secluded balcony that made her think such a place existed here too. When Spica followed him in, he firmly closed the door and drew the curtains. It was an impatient movement, different from the attitude he had shown while coming here.

Seeing that, Spica became a little anxious, but first she pulled him to sit in a chair.

“Commander, please sit here too.”

The way he looked at her while being pulled along and sitting without refusing was also docile. It felt strange, like she had become a trainer who had tamed a wild beast.

‘I just became aware of my feelings. So I’m just taking his actions more seriously.’

Spica tried to comfort herself and opened her mouth. She wanted to do something about this awkward atmosphere.

“You suddenly had a mission? I was worried because I couldn’t see you for several days.”

“……I was also worried about you, Dame Atrain. I couldn’t check your condition after you collapsed.”

“I rested well that day thanks to you, and since then I’ve only been going back and forth between home and the knight order.”

“Did you sleep well at night while I was gone?”

Spica looked straight into his eyes like she was trying to peer inside the visor.

“I knew it was you after all! I was so worried all this time.”

“Why. Were you afraid it might not be me?”

“Of course! If it had been someone else, how flustered would they have been seeing that note?”

Alkaid let out a dry laugh. Spica noticed the tension mixed within it.

‘Why is he acting like he has something to say. The way he drew the curtains earlier too.’

Her thoughts were correct.

Alkaid was trying to show what he had hidden all this time.

However, it wasn’t only because Megrez kept urging him. Rather, it bothered him that Spica kept looking back at Lepus with concern. He wanted those round eyes to contain only Alkaid himself, to make her think only of him constantly.

For that, Alkaid couldn’t just keep hiding either. Whether in beast hunts or human wars, to gain something, one had to lose something at the same time.

He slowly began to speak.

“……Have you ever been curious? Why I wear a helmet.”

“It would be a lie if I said I wasn’t.”

Spica quickly replied and added.

“Actually, I’m curious even now. Every single day. Every time I see you, Commander.”

Alkaid’s stiff expression also somewhat relaxed at the chattering that poured out like she had been waiting.

“Then what’s the reason you haven’t asked until now?”

“Everyone has stories they want to hide. I wasn’t…… special enough to you, Commander, to cross that line.”

You are a special person. More than anyone else.

Like replying to that, Alkaid threw away all the hesitation he had harbored until now and spoke in one breath.

“What I hide are my eyes. These eyes that have been passed down in the Winterhold family incite fear in others.”

“Fear?”

“People see me as evil to the extent they feel fear from me. They can’t even make eye contact, and even knights who have been with me for a long time often shrink back and get startled.”

Spica recalled the manager and staff who had bowed and scraped at the hotel. She thought it was just because he was the owner, but there was such a reason.

Now she somewhat understood Megrez’s words too.

But the part that was still puzzling was that she hadn’t felt such emotions at all when she saw him. Even thinking back again, what came to mind was surprise, admiration, and questions.

‘Was it because I didn’t make direct eye contact?’

But if what he said was true, Alkaid must have had a very difficult time until now.

Spica imagined a world where everyone turned away from her. A world where no one looked into her eyes and smiled. Even if people gradually became close, every time she saw them startled without realizing it, she would be forced to remember that she was different from everyone else.

“It must have been difficult……”

Feeling the careful touch covering the back of his hand, Alkaid smiled strangely behind his visor.

Unlike Spica’s thoughts, these eyes were quite convenient. Dealing with humans who felt fear toward him was like starting with some advantage.

What Alkaid feared was only Spica backing away in terror. He had a premonition. That everything he had endured until now would burst out in that moment.

‘Maybe that would be better.’

His nature always whispered like that.

Let’s catch the fleeing Spica and put her in a room where sunlight penetrates deeply and is always full of fresh flowers. Tie platinum chains to her ankles and make it so she can never meet anyone else for life, then he wouldn’t have to worry anymore.

However, the image of his father, who had gone mad in a similar environment, came to mind. His father, who had lived the most unhappy life in the most splendid place, made him conflicted again, even though he had already made a decision.

Then Spica’s fingertips carefully entered between his fingers like wrapping around them.

“That…… you’re saying you originally didn’t hide your eyes from people.”

“……”

“Then perhaps, um, the reason you only wear a helmet in front of me…..”

The more Spica spoke, the stranger her feelings became.

Not revealing his eyes only in front of Spica — didn’t that mean he didn’t want her to see him as a bad person like other people did?

Alkaid’s attitudes had been like that too. His voice that softened only for her to the extent that special treatment was noticeable. The comfort he offered when appearing when needed. Polite honorifics. Gentle touches…….

Even thinking about all of that, only one reason came to mind.

‘I’m not mistaken, am I? But if I believe that and then it turns out it wasn’t true like with Lepus……’

Ah, no. If she keeps thinking of her former fiancé like this, she won’t be able to start a new relationship until she dies.

‘The only way is to confirm it.’

If she saw Alkaid’s eyes, she could know his heart for certain too.

Having steeled her heart, Spica placed her hand on the visor. Alkaid reflexively grabbed her wrist.

“……It’s okay. It will be okay.”

The strength in his hand smoothly released at those words.

‘See. How can I not have excessive self-consciousness when he acts like this?’

Spica bit her lips and opened the visor.

Inside was the face from her memory—no, even more shocking when seen up close—with eyes closed. Below the lines that seemed carved with a ruler from the long eyebrows to the straight nose, long and abundant silver eyelashes trembled and slowly opened.

Spica’s lips parted smoothly at the red light gradually revealed.

‘……Fear?’

Fear? Spica thought again. Could everyone be conspiring to deceive her?

‘It doesn’t make sense that it only doesn’t work on me. Even if I don’t run away in fear, I should at least feel reluctant……’

Far from that, she wanted to keep looking.

If one felt fear looking at Alkaid’s eyes, it would be because they were too beautiful a color — pretty enough that one might think so. They were like jewels cursed for being too beautiful. Making the viewer want to possess them somehow.

Pushed by that mysterious power, the question she had endured until now popped out of her mouth.

“Do you like me?”

Alkaid was also looking at Spica like he would lick her eyes. Seeing her face this close, and her looking at him like she wanted him rather than being scared — it all felt like a fantasy.

He replied with a parched voice.

“That can’t be. It’s not that level of emotion.”

If Alkaid’s heart were described as ‘liking,’ he should feel sorry for that innocent purity. His emotions were stickier and darker than that. He couldn’t be satisfied unless he could have all of Spica.

It was a natural emotion. He too had felt like his entire life was stolen the moment he first saw her.

“……Ah. I see…… I was mistaken.”

He could see the sight of Spica’s eyes being colored with hurt at his answer.

Alkaid was thrilled to the point of getting goosebumps. It was the moment when his mate’s emotions were directed purely toward him alone. There was no way he wouldn’t be happy.

Furthermore, he wanted to see her crying face when those complete emotions exploded.

However, Alkaid skillfully contained his desire and went out to the balcony. The gaze piercing his back until the door closed was thrilling.

“Alcohol. Something sweet.”

When he received alcohol from a servant and returned immediately, Spica asked dejectedly.

“Weren’t you being considerate to let me be alone?”

“I brought something to drink. Your face was red so I thought it needed to be cooled.”

“……”

She got more heated at those words. Spica snatched the glass and downed it in one go.

It wasn’t Alkaid’s fault that he didn’t like her. Sulking in front of a perfect face that made anger dissipate and favorability accumulate just by looking at it also felt pathetic. In the end, the only thing she could vent her anger on was the drink he brought.

‘Wait, is this alcohol?’

It was moderately sweet and cool, perfectly to her taste. Spica sometimes thought this. Alkaid seemed like someone who knew everything about her.

Fiddling with the empty glass, she asked.