Chapter 7 Part 4

“No.”

This answer came easily. If he had to rate his feelings, his regard for Kang Yoonjung was not on the same level as his feelings for Cha Min-joo. He had built up time and received a lot from Min-joo. However, Min-joo remained silent as she gripped the swing chains. Her body swayed with the creaking sound.

Today, Min-joo’s wrists looked particularly thin. Her face also appeared gaunt. She had always had a slender frame, but today she seemed even more fragile. The feeling that she might break made Gihyun uneasy. Instead of buying the shoes, he should have suggested a nice meal.

He suddenly felt an odd courage. The shoes were originally meant to be her gift, but Kang Yoonjung had dissuaded him. He was trying to come up with a sophisticated way to say he would buy them next time.

“Have you had dinner?”

Once again, Min-joo changed the subject first.

“…No.”

“Shall we have ramen?”

She stood up from the swing with a casual smile. It would have been better if she had yelled like Nam Hye-kyung, but Min-joo chose to endure and cover things up again. Even if Gihyun followed her into her house and they had relations as usual, she wouldn’t say anything.

The next morning, he ate the breakfast Min-joo had prepared. It was the same as usual. Thanks to this, Gihyun did not offer any apologies or explanations. He thought it was better if things were left as they were. It was more convenient to let it pass.

***

“Where are you running off to? You borrowed money and then disappeared?”

It was the way out after having breakfast with Min-joo. As soon as he entered the classroom, Won-jun reprimanded Gihyun for not attending the senior’s birthday drinking party. Gihyun brushed it off.

“So what if I didn’t go?”

“Chang-seok said he had something to say to you.”

“Does that guy need alcohol to talk?”

“I don’t know. Damn it. But I gave him your number.”

“Why did you give out my number without asking?”

“Don’t involve me. They’ll figure it out on their own. I don’t know. Seems like it’s because of Kang Yoonjung.”

“Kang Yoonjung?”

“That senior has his eyes on Kang Yoonjung.”

Before Gihyun could get angrier, his phone started ringing in his pocket. He was about to ignore it as usual. However, the call persistently rang. Checking, he found it was an unknown number. Annoyed, Gihyun answered the call.

“Who is this?”

– It’s me.

Gihyun was momentarily lost for words. It was Yoonjung’s voice.

“Park Gihyun! Here.”

Yoonjung was sitting at a table with her arm propped up. Gihyun walked over and sat across from her. There was already an empty soju bottle on the table. Four other bottles of soju were uncapped and waiting.

“What’s with drinking in broad daylight?”

“So what? Drink when you want to drink. Have one. It’s heavy. Cheers!”

Gihyun took the drink without thinking. Yoonjung quickly refilled his glass. She smiled brightly and clinked glasses with him, making him drink another one. The two of them quickly emptied two bottles of soju.

Although he drank what was given to him, Gihyun’s tolerance wasn’t high, and he was already feeling dizzy. Moreover, memories of his mother’s alcoholism came to mind. He covered Yoonjung’s glass with his hand.

“Stop drinking.”

“Park Gihyun, are you saying that because you can’t handle your liquor?”

“Just not feeling well.”

Though he made an excuse about his condition, Yoonjung only smiled with her mouth corners up. Gihyun felt as though his true feelings were being exposed. He poured and drank the alcohol himself. But perhaps his condition was genuinely poor, as a headache accompanied the drunkenness.

Yoonjung continued to pour drinks and talk about trivial matters. Gihyun listened with one ear and just drank according to the flow.

When Gihyun’s head started to tilt uncontrollably, Yoonjung brought up a new topic.

“How’s Cha Min-joo?”

“Why are you suddenly asking about Cha Min-joo?”

“That day, it seemed like Cha Min-joo was really hurt.”

“…She’s nice.”

At Gihyun’s response, Yoonjung laughed heartily. It sounded like mockery, which only worsened Gihyun’s mood. Yoonjung laughed for a while before pouring more alcohol into Gihyun’s glass.

“Have you thought about whether you want to date me?”

Gihyun stiffened, wondering if she was being serious. He found himself pouring more alcohol into his mouth unconsciously.

“There are many men who like you.”

“There are many men who like me. But there’s no one who is good-looking and wealthy.”

“I’m not wealthy either.”

He was barely making ends meet with student loans and part-time jobs.

“Ask your mother for it.”

“My mother has passed away.”

“Then ask your father.”

“…He’s not around either.”

“Isn’t your father Professor Park Joo-sung? Professor Park’s family is famous. The second son of the Seyoung Group. The first son committed suicide, didn’t he?”

Gihyun was startled. It was a fact he hadn’t told anyone, not even Min-joo. Yoonjung continued talking with an unchanging smile.

“Last year, when I went to visit Professor Park’s lab, you ran out?”

“Last year, wasn’t I on leave?”

“I’m personally close with professors. I go in and out often.”

“…….”

“Professor Park, like you, was weak with alcohol and told me everything? He said he lived separately due to circumstances?”

It was shocking that someone who had been indifferent to his son would openly discuss personal matters with a young female student, and twist things to their advantage. The headache became even worse. Yoonjung quickly picked up on Gihyun’s sensitivity.

“Seems like you don’t get along with your father?”

“He’s a man who played with my mother and then abandoned us after I was born. Don’t you think that’s worth mentioning?”

“That’s cheap melodrama. Park Gihyun, you should have gotten over puberty long ago. Don’t be so proud. Butter up to your father. Being the grandson of Seyoung Group and the son of a professor has its perks, right?”

“Stop with the nonsense.”

As he tried to stand up, his head spun. Gihyun slumped back into his seat. He pressed his temples with his palm. Yoonjung reached out to him.

“Do you want to date me?”

She asked, gently brushing Gihyun’s head. In his muddled state, Gihyun struggled to find words.

“No.”

“Why? Is it because of Cha Min-joo? You’re not dating her, are you?”

“Even so, there’s no reason to date you either.”

“You’re interested in me.”

“…Me?”

“You seem to be subtly concerned about me. You always listen well. You buy medicine when asked, and even when I take your gift, you don’t say a word.”

“…You resemble my mother.”

Yoonjung pulled her hand away from Gihyun and laughed heartily. Her laughter was loud enough to echo in the bar. The resemblance in her laughter made Gihyun even angrier.

“Park Gihyun, do you know what the most common trick men use is?”

“What is it?”

“It’s ‘You remind me of someone I know.’”

It was uncomfortable, both physically and psychologically. Suddenly, Gihyun recalled a drinking session he had with Min-joo last year. Min-joo’s stories about her grandfather, the books and passages she showed him, her voice trying to offer comfort.

He suddenly missed Min-joo. Gihyun tried to get up from his seat once more. However, the effects of the alcohol were still strong. His body felt weak, and his vision was flickering.

Gihyun didn’t like the gosiwon. It was clean but stark, and the cheap blanket was rough. Min-joo’s place, however, had a less stark feeling. She liked to display little decorative items in a charming way.

There were many things, but it didn’t seem cluttered. The house felt well-filled. The blankets were soft. Just lying in Min-joo’s place gave him an unnecessary sense of security. That’s why he had spent so much time there, close to living together.

***

He felt oddly scratchy. The unfamiliar texture made Gihyun frown as he forced his eyes open. He saw an unfamiliar ceiling. He turned his body slightly. He felt another person’s skin. Wondering if he had called Min-joo and ended up in a motel due to the influence of alcohol, he turned his head.

Gihyun suddenly jumped up, unusually agitated.

Beside him, Yoonjung was lying n*ked. Gihyun looked at his own body. He wasn’t wearing a single piece of underwear. He was horrified and tried to recall what had happened the previous night. However, nothing came to mind. The last thing he remembered was drinking with Yoonjung at the bar. There were two n*ked people in one bed, but nothing seemed to have happened. He was only coming up with nonsensical possibilities.

While Gihyun was in confusion, Yoonjung stirred and opened her eyes. Seeing Gihyun, who looked bewildered, she laughed and casually got up.

“Park Gihyun, do you see?”

“…See what?”

Yoonjung lifted one leg, showing the inside of her thigh to Gihyun. It was a familiar scene. After s*x, when Min-joo would get up to wash, the s*men would often trickle down in that way.

Gihyun looked at Yoonjung with a stunned expression. Yoonjung, unaffected, casually tied her hair up.

Gihyun, on the bus ride home, was consumed by self-loathing.

“You said she resembled your mother.”

“You said you were attracted to me. You missed me so much.”

“You said you didn’t want to go home, but then you pushed me down.”

He recalled the comment about resembling his mother. Even though he didn’t remember clearly, it didn’t seem like something made up. The realization that he had slept with Yoonjung due to the influence of alcohol left Gihyun bewildered.

Since puberty, he had had little interest in women. He was so preoccupied with managing his mother’s emotions that he couldn’t focus on anything else.

After his mother died, he found women uncomfortable. He treated them with indifference, so they didn’t approach him easily. He rejected all confessions. The only person who had managed to slip through the narrow gap was Min-joo. But was the wall so easily breached? Had he unconsciously liked Yoonjung?

When he finally pulled himself out of these thoughts, he remembered his phone. The phone he had left in his pocket had a nearly dead battery. There were two missed calls, both from Min-joo.

Gihyun headed straight to Min-joo’s place. He entered by keying in the code. Min-joo was cleaning the floor. When she saw Gihyun come in, she redirected her gaze to the floor. Gihyun felt a sinking in his heart at Min-joo’s rejection.

“I stayed over at Won-jun’s place.”

“…….”

“I drank too much and couldn’t contact you.”

“…….”

“…I’m sorry.”