The dinner that evening was the most lavish and splendid she’d prepared since arriving in the North. Servants had poured all their energy into scrubbing and polishing the banquet hall—a space she hadn’t even known existed—to turn it into a dining venue.

After cleaning, they set up several long tables and decorated them with expensive tableware and floral arrangements. 

Though it was her first time doing this, Etia felt relieved that the result seemed acceptable—perhaps because she’d at least seen such things growing up. Once people filled the space, nothing looked awkward at all.

Despite preparing enough seats to pack the enormous banquet hall, every seat was already taken when she arrived. The bustling, noisy atmosphere seemed to spill out beyond the hall itself.

Seeing this from outside the door, Etia stopped in her tracks at the unfamiliar scene, halting her entry into the banquet hall. Something told her she shouldn’t go in.

Etia naturally disliked loud, crowded places. She was also quite shy, so even with social parties that everyone else loved, she’d pick and choose, only attending important ones. 

But this wasn’t some childhood social party—this was clearly an event she had to attend. Yet everyone inside was a stranger. Everything made even a single step feel difficult.

During the campaign, only a handful of knights had remained in the castle, and Etia had no interaction whatsoever with even that small number. 

The only face she regularly encountered was the maid assigned to her—that’s how much Etia occupied the position of duchess in name only. 

Moreover, her husband was distant enough that she’d forgotten his face, so she couldn’t lean on him either.

“Duchess?”

“Ah…”

“Aren’t you going in?”

Though it was merely a dinner, Etia lacked the courage to enter. Her vision seemed to swim, and just when she turned away, she ran into a knight entering the banquet hall. 

She didn’t know who he was, but the familiar feeling suggested he was one of Derek’s close knights, which made Etia feel even more troubled.

“I’m still—”

“My lady.”

She planned to make some excuse about feeling unwell and return to her room. No knight would object to the duchess feeling ill, so she thought it a decent excuse. 

But before she could finish speaking, a voice came from behind. When she turned, Derek’s expressionless face was already standing near them.

“Are you feeling unwell?”

As he approached, the knight in front bowed respectfully, then passed them to enter the banquet hall. 

The feeling that he was giving them space relieved Etia slightly, but she wasn’t particularly pleased about encountering Derek. Moreover, since Derek had brought up the excuse she’d planned to use first, Etia somehow couldn’t fake illness.

“No. His Highness the Crown Prince arrived, so I spent time getting ready and ended up a bit late. I’m sorry.”

“Not at all. I’m glad you’re not ill. Let’s go in together.”

“…Yes.”

Instead of feigning illness, Etia made excuses for being late and took the hand he offered. It wasn’t a complete lie, but it wasn’t quite the truth either, leaving Etia feeling somewhat awkward. 

Who would take kindly to hearing she’d tried to leave because she was uncomfortable with crowds? Especially from someone who was a duchess, no less. 

Etia felt bitter and let out a small sigh that no one noticed.

“Oh, my lady! You’ve arrived. I mean, you’re here. Haha… My lady seems even more beautiful now.”

“Thank you, Your Highness.”

“Please, join us. The meal is truly delicious. The castle’s cook must be quite skilled.”

“I’m glad it’s to your liking.”

Escorted by Derek to sit at the table with the Crown Prince, Etia maintained the ceremonial smile she’d been wearing. The Crown Prince’s trite greetings and the responses—all empty pleasantries—made things easy for Etia yet uncomfortable.

In that brief time, she remembered what her younger sibling used to say often when they were young. That she needed to be warmer. That no one likes a stiff woman.

She tried to shake off the stray thoughts, but Etia had no appetite and ate carelessly. She picked at some simple soup and bread, a few vegetables and pieces of well-cooked bacon, then set down her utensils.

The knights seated around her ate with such gusto they seemed ready to devour the table itself, making what Etia ate barely noticeable. Still, her stomach felt somewhat heavy. 

She’d forced herself to eat, worried that not eating properly with the Crown Prince present would give people something to criticize, and it seemed to have upset her stomach.

Of course, even though Etia had unwillingly become a duchess, she had to act befitting that title. Other people didn’t care about Etia’s personal circumstances anyway.

“Have you lost your appetite?”

“…Pardon?”

“You don’t seem to be eating well.”

“Ah…”

But Derek—of all people—asked about Etia’s condition. It happened just as she’d set down her utensils, feeling unable to eat any more.

Though sitting beside him, Etia hadn’t been paying him attention and was so surprised by the unexpected question that she missed her chance to respond. Staring up at him blankly like a fool, Etia belatedly mumbled.

“No, no. I ate plenty. I’m full now…”

“…”

Etia quickly corrected her expression and posture. She couldn’t act foolish with the Crown Prince and his attendants present.

In truth, no one would say anything about a momentary blank expression, but Etia was conscious of her expression and posture. 

Moreover, the thought that Derek had been watching her made her stomach feel even more uncomfortable. Maybe she should have eaten more. She felt a bit regretful.

But Etia pretended nothing was wrong, told Derek she was fine, and turned her head. She immediately felt his gaze leave her as well. Etia wanted to leave this place quickly and throw off the corset squeezing her waist.

“You two seem to get along well. It’s good to see.”

“Thank you.”

“How long did you say you’ve been married?”

Contrary to Etia’s feelings, the Crown Prince seated at the head of the table looked at them both with a good-natured smile. Etia smiled, thinking it fortunate that others saw them as getting along, though she wondered if that was actually good. 

Wouldn’t they face more criticism if they divorced while appearing to get along? 

She worried needlessly.

“A little over two years. Though the time we’ve spent together has been short since I was on campaign.”

“Ah, that’s right. How unfortunate. I feel bad for keeping newlyweds apart.”

“Not at all. It was necessary work.”

“At least you can spend time together as a couple now. You should have a second generation soon, shouldn’t you?”

“Pfft—”

“Are you all right?”

“I’m, I’m sorry…”

Contrary to Etia’s worries, the conversation flowed smoothly. Though just formal pleasantries, Etia felt her throat go dry and gulped down wine. At that moment, surprised by the sudden mention of a “second generation,” Etia choked while drinking.

“I’m sorry. I was too hasty. You’ve only just returned…”

“No, no, Your Highness. It’s not that…”

“It’s rude of me to interfere too much in a couple’s affairs. Please forgive me.”

“…I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. I’m the one who should apologize. You have plenty of time, so I hope you two spend happy times together. That’s all I want.”

She’d only choked, yet the gazes of all the surrounding servants and knights turned to Etia. 

When she hid her face toward Derek in embarrassment, Derek pulled out a handkerchief and handed it to her, then used his arm to slightly shield her from view. However, due to their size difference, Etia looked like she was hiding in a cave.

After some time passed and she’d calmed down, she apologized to the Crown Prince with an embarrassed face. But the Crown Prince, already thoroughly misunderstanding, didn’t take Etia’s words to heart. Though briefly frustrating, Etia soon decided not to care.

She couldn’t very well explain the real reason she’d been startled. How could she say she might be getting divorced soon? 

Etia caught her breath, thinking the oblivious Crown Prince was actually fortunate.

* * *

After that, the dinner quickly wrapped up with promises for next time. The inspection party’s schedule still had many days ahead, so there was no need to exhaust themselves on the first day.

Once the Crown Prince returned to his room and all the knights and attendants returned to theirs, the castle grew quiet again. Only then did Etia feel comfortable, sensing this was the Sylvester Castle she knew.

Though it had definitely been someone else’s home, it had somehow become a familiar place to Etia. That fact gave her a very strange feeling. But even that comfort was brief.

When she finished bathing and came out wearing light clothes, Derek was in the room, similarly dressed in light clothing. He sat on the sofa near the fireplace reading documents, glanced at her when she emerged, then began reading the documents again. Only Etia was flustered.

“If a married couple uses different bedrooms, there will be talk.”

“…”

“I’ll return to my study at dawn, so sleep comfortably.”

Entering the room, Etia saw Derek and froze in place mid-entry. She hadn’t expected him to be in the room.

Though he kindly added an explanation upon discovering Etia, her flustered feelings remained. 

She understood what he was concerned about, but that didn’t make this awkward encounter any smoother.

In truth, this room was meant for a married couple. Couples should naturally share a bedroom, and it had been stranger that he’d been sleeping in his study or a guest room all this time.

But that was the story for normal couples, and they were different. Etia had thought they were different.

Etia was used to using a different room from Derek, and that felt natural. Wasn’t theirs a loveless marriage? 

Moreover, he’d been on the battlefield for years. Having a room to herself was actually more familiar to Etia.

So just having Derek in the room felt strange. This was surely right, yet Etia couldn’t shake the unfamiliar feeling. She couldn’t claim ownership of the room. 

This was the couple’s bedroom, and this castle was Derek’s. In short, Derek being here was natural. Yet Etia still couldn’t move a single step in her flustered state.

As Etia stood there blankly unable to do anything, Derek let out a small sigh without her noticing. Though coming to the couple’s bedroom was something he hadn’t wanted either, Derek felt awkward seeing Etia so obviously dislike it. 

As Derek wondered whether he should leave even now, Etia finally managed to speak.