Chapter 12

Eria’s life had always been eventful, and still was. Whenever she climbed a mountain she thought she couldn’t cross, another huge mountain appeared before her.

But this… what was this supposed to be?

“Deputy Commander Robet. You’re joking, right?”

“Sir Railus, do I look like someone who jokes around idly?”

At Deputy Commander Robet’s words, the crowd stirred. Eria stood stiff as a board, staring at one spot—at the person standing next to Deputy Commander Robet. While everyone else seemed shocked enough to faint, that person alone stood on the platform, smiling brightly as he looked at the knights.

“So, Kan—ah, I mean… Sir Hakan is really the Commander of our unit?”

“That’s right.”

“Then why did he pretend to be an ordinary knight all this time?”

Kan, who had been standing with his hands behind his back, straightened up and looked at the knights. He wiped the smile from his lips and spoke instead of Deputy Commander Robet.

“When the war started, I was quite young. I thought if I took the Commander’s seat from the beginning and faced you all, you wouldn’t follow me. At first, I was truly clueless. Now, I think I’ve grown up a bit and learned a lot, so I decided to show myself to you. Haven’t you all wondered every day who the Commander leading this place is? How, without ever showing his face in the unit, he knows about even the smallest incidents that happen?”

Kan—or rather, his real name, Hakan. The Grand Duke of the Lohas Empire. He was the leader of this unit. Whenever the knights talked, the mysterious Commander was always a favorite topic. Eria had seen Kan quietly listening among them, always smiling at the seniors, which probably hadn’t meant respect. Until yesterday, he’d been right beside her, but now he seemed strange and distant.

“This is my first time in the army. My first war. But by His Majesty’s orders, I was suddenly put in charge of this special forces unit. I couldn’t step forward in front of you all without any preparation. So I chose the position I held until yesterday—an ordinary knight. I wanted to see the organization’s flaws from your perspective and try to fix them.”

“…”

“I wasn’t trying to tease you or hide anything on purpose. I did it for our unit and for you, so I hope you won’t be too angry.”

The knights looked dumbfounded. Even if he asked them not to be angry, a lot had happened—especially that unpleasant incident a few weeks ago, when Eria joined and Kan stood up to the seniors and got beaten. Memories of those moments flashed through their minds. When Eria glanced at the knight standing beside her, he looked so pale he seemed about to collapse.

‘If I rise up and protect you, is that okay?’

A few weeks ago, Kan had said that. She’d almost forgotten, since things had been quiet since then, but now she felt like she’d been blindsided. Eria stared at Hakan on the platform, and when their eyes met, she quickly looked away.

‘Is this real?’

Honestly, it was hard to believe even when she saw it; it felt like a dream. She’d faced many mountains in life, and coming here had brought many dreamlike experiences, so this felt even more surreal.

The shocking morning roll call and training ended, and even at breakfast, the unit was unusually quiet. Everyone seemed deeply shocked.

“Hey, Dame Eria. Did you know? You and Kan—no, the Commander—seemed pretty close.”

Someone quietly asked Eria as she ate. She simply shook her head in reply. Even the one who seemed closest hadn’t known, which seemed to comfort them.

***

“Isn’t this really shocking?”

Ter, whose injuries had almost healed, was recruited into the special forces a few days ago by the Commander’s order and began training. He kept chattering by Eria’s side, oblivious to her thoughts.

“How could Kan… no, how could he be the Commander here? Everyone was completely fooled. Amazing.”

“Yeah. It’s shocking.”

“Dame Eria, you must have been even more surprised. You were with him every day and didn’t know.”

“There were reasons.”

“Well, I get it. He still looks quite young… The war started years ago. He must have been so young at first.”

Eria nodded in agreement but didn’t have the energy for more conversation. After kicking Ter out of the tent, she sat alone, lost in thought.

She’d given him her heart, her body, and even promised to take responsibility. Now, what would become of all this? Was he just playing with her? All sorts of doubts crept in. But without meeting him, there were no answers.

Eria met Hakan at training that afternoon. After training ended, she was summoned to the Commander’s tent. It had been days since they met alone. He’d said he was delivering an important message to the capital, and upon return, he was the Commander.

Inside the tent was only Hakan, but Eria greeted him formally. Hakan realized she’d arrived and quickly stood to approach.

“Dame Eria.”

“Speak comfortably, Commander.”

“Sorry I couldn’t tell you sooner.”

Eria looked up at Hakan. For a moment, his sunset-like crimson eyes shook her heart. She understood his situation rationally, but couldn’t help feeling a little hurt.

Hakan watched her expression and lightly placed a hand on her shoulder.

“I tried to tell you a few times… but I didn’t have the courage.”

“I was a bit hurt. And very surprised.”

“I understand. I’m sorry. But it’s just my title that’s changed, nothing else. I hope you won’t change either.”

“…No. I think this is beyond what I can take responsibility for, Commander. Even if this continues, when the war ends and we go home, the gap between us will only grow.”

If he were just a Commander, maybe it’d be different.

But he was the Grand Duke of the Empire. Not just a noble, but a member of the Imperial Family. The more she thought about it, the more it felt like lightning striking her mind.

“It’s best to end this childish play here.”

Looking down, Eria spoke quietly and turned away. Hakan grabbed her.

“I have no intention of letting you go. Child’s play? A joke? I never saw it that way.”

From behind, Hakan hugged her. She’d missed this warmth while he was away, so she couldn’t push him away. Eria bit her lower lip. Her feelings were more important, and honestly, she could have just embraced him without thinking. What happened after the war could be dealt with then. But the deeper her feelings grew, the more petty and weak she felt. She wanted to show her hurt somehow.

“Right now, I feel like such a fool.”

“…I’m sorry.”

His apology felt genuine. Maybe she wanted to accept it that way.

“I never teased or played with you. If you ever had such useless thoughts, I hope you’ll erase them now.”

Eria couldn’t resist anymore and tightly held Hakan’s arm. Taking it as permission, Hakan turned and gently kissed her cheek. Then he softly licked her earlobe. Eria trembled, eyes closed.

“Is this how you greet me after all this time?”

“I missed you so much I thought I’d die. Didn’t you?”

“The person I knew yesterday… it’s hard to tell if you’re the same person or not. I’m still unsure.”

“But your body will remember.”

Ignoring her proud reply, Hakan kept kissing her. Eria glared at him, then turned to face him.

“Even your name is different. You said you were just a noble… but you’re not.”

“…I hope you’ll keep calling me Kan. I am just a noble in name. There’s nothing in my life I chose for myself, except you.”

Hakan kissed her. Eria didn’t avoid him. When his warmth overlapped her lips, she wrapped her arms around his neck as if she’d been waiting. His kisses always felt awkward yet thrilling, but after days apart, it felt even more exciting and pleasant. Hakan rolled his tongue, swimming in her mouth.

“Hnn…”

Just kissing made her body heat up. As if she already knew the feeling, she started tingling below. When her legs grew weak, Hakan gently lifted her onto the bed.

It was her first time in the Commander’s tent. Spacious and quiet. As Hakan climbed on top of her to kiss again, Eria stopped him.

“Won’t someone hear outside?”

“They won’t.”

“…Liar.”

“The guards outside my tent have no ears. No mouths, either.”

“Then this isn’t a secret.”

“I never meant to keep it secret. If it bothers you, just pretend it’s a secret between us.”

At his stubbornness, Eria rolled her eyes. When she didn’t back down, Hakan finally gave in and sent those outside away. They’d probably sense something was up, but just knowing no one was around made Eria feel much safer.

“Is that enough? Then, excuse me.”

Back again, Hakan urgently undressed her like a man finding an oasis in the desert, and immediately bit her chest. Unable to stop his sudden advance, Eria arched her back and moaned.

“Kan…!”

“Yes, keep calling me that.”

“…Ahh.”

“When you call me, my name feels so sweet.”

Hakan smiled. Then he bit her chest again, sucking hard. Reflexively, Eria wrapped her arms around his head and lifted her hips.