Chapter 8.3

She still had work left over from her confrontation with Baron Lewin, so it would be better to handle it in the fancy night duty room than on the hard chair in the infirmary.

‘If I submit my report, I’ll get a few days off. I’ve never taken any time off before, so I should be able to get at least two days in a row. With the weekend, that’s four days—I should go somewhere.’

Choosing to think as positively as possible in an irreversible situation, Daphne recalled that Hailey had once told her about a nice place nearby to have fun.  

She hadn’t listened very carefully at the time, so she couldn’t quite remember, but just the thought of enjoying a vacation brought a smile to her lips. Twirling the night duty room key, Daphne headed toward the knights’ building and looked up at the moon hanging high in the sky.

‘Would he be sleeping by now?’  

Maybe because she’d seen him more often at night than during the day, Evan’s face came to mind naturally. Thinking of him made her feel weak all over. That wasn’t how she meant to say it… But what could she do about regrets now? At the same time, she wondered if maybe things would work out if she just talked to him properly.

‘And what exactly do you want to do if you talk it out?’  

She asked herself, but the answer didn’t come easily. Or maybe it was something she didn’t want to admit.

Love, really.  

Was this feeling truly love? Wasn’t it just a simple physical attraction?  

So, was it possible that Evan felt love for her, while she only felt a physical pull toward him?  

Receiving the feelings of someone who spoke of true love, when she only felt physical desire, made her feel too guilty.

Daphne tried to forcibly erase her thoughts of Evan as she headed to the duty room. She found comfort in the unchanged room, but when she saw the bed where they’d lain together, her heart grew unsettled again.

The moment she saw the bed, the sensation of her underwear, soaked through, made Daphne feel a deep despair.

Ah, really, maybe I’m the hopeless pervert. In truth, it wasn’t Sir Clyde who was the pervert, but me….

* * *

“Where are you going?”  

“Just to get some headache medicine.”  

“Are you sick or something? You’ve been taking medicine all the time lately. Go to the infirmary and get a checkup.”  

At Jermel’s words, Evan shook his head. If it was an illness, it was, but for a different reason. Evan rubbed his aching temples, feeling as if a string were pulled tight, and left the room.

Ever since he’d made that absurd confession and run away, his head had been full of thoughts about Daphne.  

He shouldn’t have done that.  

Why did he have to say that and then run off?  

She must have been surprised. She’d never have guessed he felt that way….

Negative thoughts kept repeating. Because of that, he couldn’t sleep, and after several sleepless nights, a splitting headache had settled in.

Thinking he’d take a few pills and try to sleep tonight, he headed for the duty room on the first floor. In the dark hallway, only that room was lit.

Evan crouched in front of the door, lifted the carpet, and took out the key. Frowning at the throbbing in his head, he opened the door.

‘This is where I was with Sir Grey….’  

Suddenly recalling the past, Evan made a pained face. And when he stepped inside, he unexpectedly met someone’s eyes.

“…Sir Clyde?”  

“…Sir Grey?”  

“What brings you here….”  

It looked like she’d just come in and was unpacking, with her bag on the bed. Evan put on a calm face and closed the door. He had to look as normal as possible.

“I have a headache, so I came to get some medicine.”  

“Ah, just a moment. I’ll get it right away. Have you had dinner?”  

Evan pressed his lips together and nodded. While he was in turmoil inside, Daphne acted as if nothing was wrong, as if there was no problem at all.

So it really was just me who couldn’t sort out my feelings….  

Feeling like he might burst into tears, Evan deliberately twisted his face. He couldn’t even watch her moving around, so he dropped his gaze.

Maybe because it was an unfamiliar space, she took a while to move. 

Ah, this isn’t right. 

At her quiet muttering, Evan almost forgot his choked-up feeling and nearly laughed.

“Here you go. It’s a bit late, so this will be better than anything else. It’s absorbed much faster, and you won’t have trouble sleeping.”  

Evan glanced sideways at Daphne. He couldn’t tell if she was really okay or just pretending. His own reflection was clear in her eyes, as dark as the pre-dawn sky.

“Thank you.”  

He bowed his head without hesitation and downed the potion she handed him in one go. The subtle sweetness on his tongue made his throat feel parched.

Why did Jermel’s words—about just keeping it casual—come to mind at this moment? Evan widened his eyes and bit his lip to keep from crying.

“S-Sir Clyde?”  

Startled by her voice, Evan quickly turned his back. He couldn’t let her see him like this.

“I’ll be going now.”  

Forgetting even to throw away the empty bottle, Evan hurried out. Being near her made his heart race and wouldn’t let him calm down. And that went for his lower body as well.

Getting aroused in a situation like this was no help at all. He was already struggling to look good; if she saw him aroused and on the verge of tears, he might just bite his tongue off.

“Wait!”  

At her slightly urgent voice, Evan stopped in his tracks. Should he turn around? Or just stand still and wait for her to speak? His head was about to explode.

“…I have something to say. Do you have a moment?”  

At her tense voice, Evan’s hand fell away from the doorknob.

* * *

By this point, it really felt like something was going wrong.

Daphne felt her heart grow anxious at the sight of Evan, his head bowed like a criminal. If anyone was at fault, it was her, so why did he look like he’d committed some grave sin?

She hadn’t sorted out her thoughts, but she couldn’t just let things go, so she’d stopped him; now she didn’t know where to start.

“Um, Sir Clyde.”  

“…Yes.”  

His answer came a beat late, and he lifted his head. Seeing the complicated emotions in his eyes, Daphne felt a pang of guilt.

Haah.  

Daphne let out a deep sigh. At that, his shoulders flinched. She had no idea what he might have heard while she was dealing with Baron Lewin.

She’d even coldly pushed away someone who offered to help, telling him it was none of his business, so he must have been hurt.

She hadn’t been emotionally worn out by the exaggerated rumors, but she worried he might have misunderstood something.

There were, in fact, plenty of nasty rumors about her. That she was a swindler’s daughter and must have a similar nature, or that she was trying to snag a rich man and change her fate.

Of course, the “rich man” in those rumors was Evan. Her own problems had probably dragged him into bad gossip as well.

But correcting false rumors was always the hardest thing. Fortunately, just being known as Isaac’s disciple helped shift public opinion, but people’s perceptions of her still weren’t good.

So she had to apologize to him and tell him everything. Even if it meant revealing a shameful past she never wanted him to see.

She knew it wasn’t her fault, but it was still hard to expose a weakness she’d always wanted to hide.

“The truth is, I am Marquis Avery’s….”  

“So the rumors were true?”  

“Rumors?”  

Not understanding, she asked back in confusion, and Evan half-rose as he replied.

“I heard you’d be leaving for the Mage Tower with the Grand Mage.”  

“From whom?”  

“A friend in the Magic Development Department told me. I heard you refused the offer to transfer there, so now you’re being sent to the Mage Tower. That place is supposed to be like a prison in the middle of the sea! How can there be such unfair treatment? Just because you’re the Grand Mage’s disciple, you’re being exiled to the Mage Tower!”

Exiled? Who, me?  

She knew there were all sorts of rumors, but she hadn’t realized it had gotten this far. Honestly, the story about her joining the Imperial Palace to seduce a man seemed closer to the truth.