“Kim Soon-young, listen carefully. I came here for you. Breaking off my engagement to that woman was for you, and deciding to go through all this mess again was for you. So don’t even think about going back to where you came from. I’ll see to it that everything, including your brother, goes back to where it belongs. But you, you stay by my side. Whatever it takes, whatever name it goes by, just stay with me.”

What could I say? I couldn’t think of anything. All I could see was his heart, finally revealed to me.

It felt like a bird’s cry. The air was hot and the scent of roses was still sweet. The murmur of people, the careful steps. The slanting sunlight through the lattice window. But nothing could reach me.

I just let him hold me. The searing heat of his lips pressed against mine, the firm grip of his big hand on my wrist, the unfamiliar texture of his suit brushing against my body – it felt like my whole world had been turned upside down.

From that night on, he came to my room to sleep. For the first time, I gave myself completely to a man.

And yet I was afraid. It all felt like a clothes that didn’t fit, like it wasn’t really mine.

I love Han Woo-jin. That much is true.

But Woo-jin… is it really right for me to hold him like this?

***

“Are you ready?”

The housekeeper’s voice reached my ears in a tone I felt I would never get used to. I lifted my head.

Another day had passed. I had heard that the uproar over yesterday’s broken engagement and Woo-jin’s visit had caused more chaos in the house. Throughout the night, I could hear his Grandpa’s angry voice echoing through the walls, while Woo-jin seemed to remain silent. In the morning, I received a message telling me to get ready to go out. 

I put on the soft, fine cotton blouse and skirt the housekeeper had prepared for me. Stockings – those suffocating socks – and western style shoes completed the outfit. The shoes, which pinched my feet, were unbearably uncomfortable. Every step I took made me want to scream in pain. Honestly, how on earth did western women wear these things? I wanted to scream for someone to take my rubber shoes back.

It wasn’t until I got into the black car waiting at the front gate that I finally saw Woo-jin.

“Ah…”

I wanted to greet him, but for some reason an inexplicable shyness kept the words from coming out. He looked different. No, everything between us had changed completely. A bond where we knew everything about each other, a relationship where we were completely connected. Even when we were apart, it felt as if we were embraced.

“Where… are we going?”

He just smiled, as if out of habit, and took my hand. His face looked worn and tired. Had he been in a fight? I wanted to ask, but before I could, Woo-jin turned his face away. Left with no choice, I remained silent and looked out of the car window.

The streets outside were alive with energy, a stark contrast to the quieter scenes of Chungmu. The roads were lined with theaters and busy shops, brimming with life. 

The car honked loudly as it navigated through the crowded street, eventually coming to a stop in front of an upscale tailor shop. Through the spotless glass windows, mannequins dressed in exquisite Western-style clothing for both men and women stood proudly. Above the shop, a sign read, Atelier Del Mundo. Later, I would learn that this meant somewhere in the world in Spanish.

I got out of the car with my eyes wide open. Where was this place? Woo-jin walked confidently to the entrance and pushed the door open. A small silver bell attached to the door jingled softly as he swung it in.

The sound drew the attention of a middle-aged man who was busy cutting cloth at a large, cloth-covered desk. He looked up, and to my astonishment, standing beside him, dressed as a shopkeeper, was my brother Jae-yeol.

“Soon-young!”

Jae-yeol called out, his face lighting up.

“brother”

“Doryeon-nim!”

Said the surprised voice of the middle-aged man.

A flurry of titles and exclamations overlapped and echoed around me, but none of it mattered. I ran straight to Jae-yeol and hugged him. Meeting him again felt like it had been a hundred years since I last saw him at the main gate of Chungmu. So much had happened since then, but just knowing that he was alive filled me with an overwhelming sense of relief. Agwi hadn’t found him. That monster had lied.

***

“America?”

I finally had the chance to talk to Jae-yeol in the back room of the shop. When Woo-jin suggested that he go to America, Jae-yeol’s eyes lit up. But soon he shook his head.

“But Woo-jin… what if…?”

“Go, Jae-yeol. Don’t worry about anything. I’ll pay for everything.”

“But…”

Jae-yeol didn’t like the idea. I sat on a chair in the shop and listened to them argue. I couldn’t understand him. If the situation was so serious, why did he refuse to go to America?

When Woo-jin finally stepped out for a moment, I approached Jae-yeol.

“Brother, stop being stupid and go to America.”

My firm tone made Jae-yeol look up.

“What?”

“Don’t you understand? Do you want to go on living like this, always being chased by the police? Brother, this is treason. If they catch you, you’ll be sentenced to death. What is the point of dying for something like this? What will happen to me and what about Grandma?

Jae-yeol stared at me, frozen. I gritted my teeth and clenched my fists as I continued. 

“I don’t know. I just… want to live. I just want to work, take care of Grandma, earn money and live a decent life, in peace.” 

“That’s what everyone wants – a decent life. Not just you, everyone!” 

“Will going to the president, shouting, protesting and running from the police really get you there?” 

“Soon-young!” 

“Enough. Please, just go. Go to America. They’ll send you, right? Woo-jin should go home too. . It’s better for him to be a chaebol’s son than to become a spy or a communist!”

“How can you even say that? Do you have any idea how terrible that would be for Woo-jin?”

“What’s so difficult about it? What’s wrong with his family being rich?” 

“Is that what you mean… Kim Soon-young, I never thought you would think like that…”