“What’s this, clothes?”

A polka-dot dress was pulled out of the box. A cloche hat and shoes followed. Hannah began to examine the dress closely.

It had been three years since she received it, but Alisa had worn it only once. And even then, it had been in secret, in the dead of night while both maids were asleep. Because of that, the dress was as good as new, without a trace of wear.

“It’s a bit old, but the fabric is good quality — I could get decent money for it if I resell it.”

Hannah’s eyes lit up as she put the dress back in the box.

“That, please give that back!”

“Get out of the way.”

“No!”

Alisa grabbed one side of the box in Hannah’s hands.

She hung on with her full weight, and Hannah shoved her shoulder with an annoyed expression. Even as she fell sideways, she refused to let go of the box, and one side of it tore away.

“What a nuisance…… It’s not as though you can even wear it. What’s the point of wanting it so badly?”

Hannah muttered this and tried to walk out the door. But Alisa didn’t give up. Unable to get to her feet, she stretched out her arms and wrapped them around Hannah’s legs.

“What is this, let go!”

“Please give back the clothes, please.”

Hannah tried to shake her off by swinging her legs from side to side, but Alisa clung on with everything she had, and Hannah simply started walking forward. With every step Hannah took, Alisa was dragged along the floor.

Her elbows scraped against the wooden floor and ached. Her skirt rode up and her bare knees were exposed.

This wouldn’t stop Hannah. But if she didn’t do even this, there was truly nothing she could do. She didn’t want to stand by and watch helplessly. Even if she ended up with the same outcome, she had to struggle with everything she had.

Because that was the only way to hope for a miracle.

……But was that really true?

Did she really believe that if she struggled and wished hard enough, a miracle would actually come?

Alisa squeezed her eyes shut. Tears streamed down her face from her wet eyes.

No — the truth was, if she didn’t, there would be nothing she could do at all. She would have to accept her helplessness completely. She would have to admit that even if she went back to three years ago, to the day her mother left, there was nothing she could have done then either.

Apparently deciding she had had enough, Hannah set the box down on the floor and tried to pry Alisa off.

“Greedy little brat…… stop clinging on like a leech and get away from me!”

“Ugh, just the clothes, please, just give those back.”

“What’s gotten into you today, honestly?”

Hannah grabbed her long curly hair. It pulled taut, as though it might be yanked out by the roots at any moment. Then Hannah swung her arm wide and shoved her away, and there was no holding on any longer.

“Oh……”

Alisa lost her grip on Hannah’s skirt, flailed, and caught the tablecloth. The tablecloth was yanked free, and the vase sitting on top of it fell.

Splash — the water from the vase poured down over Alisa’s head. Only then did she stop fighting.

“You finally let go. What kind of child is this greedy…… I don’t know whether she takes after her mother or her father, honestly……”

Tears pricked her eyes. Through her blurred, misted vision, she could see the box.

Stupid, stupid Alisa Ludendorff. What does that box even matter. What does the dress even matter.

If she had really wanted to find her mother, she should have run out of the house barefoot. She should have asked around, put up flyers, taken out an advertisement in the newspaper. If she didn’t have the money for that, she should have begged for it.

No, no. Before any of that — she should have saved her father, who was wasting away. She should have prayed, or whispered to him to let go of her mother, or done something. She should have been more desperate. She should have tried harder.

Here she was, unable to even reach for the things she truly wanted to protect, only going through the motions of protecting the things that were easy.

You’re really pathetic, Alisa.

She scrubbed at her eyes with the back of her hand. She couldn’t tell if it was tears or the water from the vase, so she just kept wiping and wiping.

‘But there’s nothing else I can do.’

This is all I’m capable of.

All I can manage is trying to get back a gift box that’s right within reach. If I don’t even do this much, I’m admitting that I really am a child who can’t do anything at all.

Alisa watched Hannah pick up the box. She watched the bottom of the box lift away from the floorboards, Hannah’s skirt flare out, her stride lengthen — she watched all of it.

She just wanted everything to stop, right here.

If nothing could go the way she wanted, at least let her have time to prepare herself. To say a proper goodbye……

“……Stop, please……”

In that instant, she felt her body lift. A strange, soaring sensation she had never felt before took hold of her entire body.

From her fingertips to her toes, every nerve stood on end. Everything in the world came into sharp focus all at once, then vanished to nothing, over and over again. In that sensation of being able to control even the blood flowing through her veins, Alisa raised her head.

The world had stopped.

Hannah’s right foot was stretched forward, frozen in midair.

“Oh……”

Alisa’s eyes went wide.

“Really? It really stopped?”

Her voice rang through the hallway. Startled by how loud it came out, she looked around — but Hannah still hadn’t moved.

This was no time to be standing around. She had to move that box somewhere else right now. Alisa hastily wiped her eyes and got to her feet. She put strength into her limp arms and legs and snatched the box from Hannah’s hand.

The box leaving Hannah’s grip and Hannah’s foot touching the floor happened at the same moment. The world that had paused for just an instant began to move again.

“Huh? Where did the box — you wretched little brat!”

Alisa froze with a look of dismay.

But Hannah’s gaze swept right past her face. She failed to find Alisa standing right there in front of her and began searching elsewhere.

“What, where are you! Where did you go all of a sudden!”

Hannah moved off in the wrong direction, looking all around. She seemed not to notice Alisa’s presence at all. Whatever was happening, one thing was clear — it was an opportunity.

Alisa backed away step by step and ran down the stairs. From below came the sound of Mary eating, oblivious to everything, and her great-aunt chattering away. She passed the kitchen and threw open the front door without thinking.

“Alisa Ludendorff, where did that girl go!”

Hannah’s voice rang out from the second floor. But the sound was swallowed by a crack of thunder that split the sky. The cloudless sky had turned pitch black in an instant, lit up by flashes of lightning.

The rain that came down was frightening — like a disaster pouring from the heavens. Alisa stared at the rain falling so hard she could barely see, then plunged into it.

From behind her came faint voices calling her name. She heard her great-aunt screaming at the sound of the thunder, and Mary jumping up to calm her and knocking over a chair in her haste.

Alisa left all of it behind and ran. Her clothes soaked through in moments, and the water running down her hair streamed along her cheeks.

Her pace quickened. She ran down the hillside so fast her knees nearly buckled beneath her, passed the cliff overlooking the sea.

Beyond the cliff, the sky as far as she could see was dyed completely black.

Alisa clutched the box tight in the endless downpour. A laugh rose in her. Her chest swelled.

For the first time, she had protected something. It wasn’t much, but this time she hadn’t lost it helplessly.

She ran and ran until she reached the stone footbridge leading into town. Still no one noticed her. People were dashing under the eaves of nearby shops to escape the sudden rain — not a single person spared a glance at Alisa standing in the downpour without an umbrella.

She thought of that dawn long ago, when she had found her mother’s empty room. The memory flashed past — the regret of wondering whether she might have caught her mother if she had come just a little sooner. The days when she only learned what she had lost after it was already gone.

‘This time I didn’t lose it.’

I held on. I held on, Mother.

The rain was slowly growing lighter. The sky cleared at the same pace it had darkened.

Alisa leaned against the stone railing of the footbridge and held the box close. In this moment, not a single worry reached her.