<Chapter 3> If Only My Heart Could Be Washed Away by the Rain (Part 2)
As soon as she entered her room, she locked the door and sank to the floor. She was glad it rained. Thanks to it, she couldn’t tell if the water running down her face was rain or tears.
Elizabeth buried her face in her knees and sobbed loudly. She no longer wanted to stay at Agaphel Castle. She could no longer smile by his side.
* * *
Elizabeth’s wish ultimately didn’t come true. Stella jumped at her words of leaving alone.
Moreover, she must have told the Duke, as he summoned her. Elizabeth sat quietly in the Duke’s study, waiting for him to speak.
The Duke’s blue eyes gazed steadily at Elizabeth. Though they were the same color as Kiern’s, they somehow looked different. They were oppressive and threatening.
“You want to leave.”
“Yes. I can’t keep imposing on you.”
“It seems I’ve disappointed you.”
“It’s not that. You’ve been more than considerate. It’s just that I…….”
Elizabeth hesitated, unable to finish her sentence. The words about not wanting to stay here anymore were stuck in her throat.
The Duke’s indifferent gaze turned to her. Elizabeth lowered her head even more, afraid he might see through her feelings. How he interpreted it, he suddenly spoke unexpectedly.
“Indeed. It’s about time you settled down. With Kiern getting engaged soon, there’s no reason you can’t.”
“No. I don’t want to get married……!”
“Stella said you’ve been feeling lonely. I haven’t paid enough attention to you. I should have found you a match sooner.”
“No, Your Grace. I’m not thinking about marriage. I just don’t want to impose anymore…….”
“Elizabeth, I’ll find you a good match, so don’t say you want to leave anymore.”
“…….”
“If I cast you and your mother out, what will people think? Moreover, if I send you out alone, there will be even more talk.”
The Duke silenced Elizabeth. His words carried a pressure that seemed to crush her if she opposed him.
“I’m sorry.”
Knowing he hated wasting time more than anything, Elizabeth could only leave the study without protesting.
She didn’t know what Stella had said to make the Duke act this way. Leaving the castle would mean disobeying the Duke’s orders.
There were no options left but to either marry and leave or continue staying.
Frustrated by the reality that she couldn’t leave Agaphel Castle, Elizabeth clenched her fists. Her life was hers, yet she couldn’t do anything as she wished.
As she was on her way to confront Stella, a passing servant noticed her and spoke.
“Ellie, there you are. Go to the drawing room. A guest is waiting for you.”
“Huh? Who is it?”
Having no appointments, she asked again, but the servant was too busy to answer and left.
Elizabeth awkwardly touched her cheek and headed to the drawing room. Wondering who it could be, she knocked on the door and heard a familiar voice.
“Come in.”
“……!”
Elizabeth hesitated with her hand on the doorknob. It was Abigail Prairie’s voice.
After taking several deep breaths, Elizabeth entered the drawing room. As expected, Abigail Prairie was sitting there. She gestured for Elizabeth to sit in front of her.
They had never had tea together outside of the Ingrid Club gatherings. Moreover, they weren’t close enough for unannounced visits.
Elizabeth sat across from her, trying to guess the reason for her visit.
“What brings you here?”
Abigail put down her teacup and looked at Elizabeth with a cold face. Her expression, devoid of a smile, gave a different impression than usual.
As the daughter of a Marquis family, Abigail lacked nothing. Her ever-present smile often carried an air of arrogance and confidence. It was an aura naturally acquired from living as a noble.
In contrast, Elizabeth had none of that elegance. From the start, there was no pride in a noble only in name.
Thus, she always felt intimidated in front of Abigail. The innate dignity that existed from birth always overwhelmed her.
Abigail stared at Elizabeth silently without bringing up her purpose. The unknown tension made Elizabeth feel suffocated.
Did she come knowing something?
Elizabeth recalled the people who attended the ball that day. Even if everyone was busy with their own affairs, someone must have seen her and Kiern.
James saw her and Kiern heading to the terrace. Since James and Austin were especially close, the Prairie family might have heard about it.
If James had told Abigail directly, she could understand why Abigail came to see her.
As Elizabeth sat silently like a sinner, Abigail suddenly smiled brightly and spoke.
“Just passing by, I wanted to have tea with you, Lady Lua. We’ve been distant despite being in the same Ingrid club.”
“Is that so?”
“I’ve been wanting to get closer to you, Lady Lua. I’ll be staying here soon, so it would be nice to be friends.”
Elizabeth’s throat went dry at her words, accompanied by a gentle eye smile. It was absurd to talk about life after marriage when they weren’t even engaged yet.
But in a world where it was natural for a fiancée to stay at her fiancé’s castle, Elizabeth feared that day would come soon.
She had to sort out her feelings before then. She couldn’t let Kiern find out, let alone Abigail.
Otherwise, it would truly mean she had done something wrong.
Since Kiern had decided to get engaged, she was someone who needed to disappear. Having been rejected, she had to step away from his life.
To avoid becoming a blemish on his life.
To protect her own dignity.
At that moment, Abigail handed her an invitation. It was for a light flower arrangement gathering at the penthouse in the capital, where social meetings were actively held.
Since it was an implicit gathering for noble ladies from Earl families and above, Elizabeth just stared blankly at the card.
Surely she hadn’t come to boast. Unable to discern the intention behind offering the invitation, she remained silent, and Abigail spoke.
“Normally, it wouldn’t be possible, but I received permission from the club members. I’d like you to join us, Miss Elizabeth.”
“No, I’m not used to such gatherings…….”
“It’s an invitation I obtained with difficulty. You’re not trying to embarrass me, are you?”
Abigail insisted as if she genuinely wanted to be friends. There was an unspoken pressure that made it feel like she couldn’t refuse.
Elizabeth felt suffocated as both the Duke and Abigail seemed to be trying to stifle her. She opened her mouth, rubbing her chest out of frustration.
“Really, it’s fine. I’m not accustomed to such events.”
“…….”
“I’m sorry, but I’m not feeling well right now. If you have nothing more to say, I’ll be going. I’m sorry for the trouble, Lady.”
Elizabeth politely declined and stood up. That’s when Abigail spoke.
“You seem to think you have a choice.”
Her soft voice carried a chill as sharp as a knife pointed at her throat.
Elizabeth looked at her in bewilderment, wondering if she had misheard. Abigail raised her head.
There was no hint of a smile in her eyes. Abigail looked directly at her and said,
“Living in Agaphel Castle, you seem to be unaware of your own position. Does this seem like mere kindness to you?”
“Lady Prairie.”
“Join in while you’re being included. Don’t put on airs you don’t have.”
“What on earth are you saying? You’re being very rude to someone who never asked to be included.”
“Rude?”
Abigail chuckled as if amused, then picked up her teacup. She slowly stood up and poured the tea over Elizabeth’s upper body. As the hot tea soaked her clothes, the area touched by the tea burned.
“Ugh!”
As Elizabeth swallowed her groan, Abigail spoke.
“You were the one who was rude first, Miss Elizabeth.”
“What… what is this…?”
The sudden dousing left her speechless. Abigail muttered with a blank expression.
“You openly went to the terrace with an engaged man.”
“!!”
“Did you think no one saw? Well, you would have known if you’d ever been involved in social circles.”
Despite the mocking tone, Elizabeth couldn’t muster any defense. The despairing realization that she had been found out felt like being doused with cold water rather than hot tea. Abigail’s words began to stab at her.
“I arranged this meeting hoping you would realize your place, Lady Lua.”
“…….”
“You know it too, don’t you? With your status, you can’t stand beside Sir Kiern. Did you think being part of Ingrid Club meant you were on the same level as me?”
Abigail looked Elizabeth up and down with a sneer.
“I don’t care if you have feelings for Young Master Agaphel or not, as long as it’s not noticeable to others.”
“…….”
“But even that, you couldn’t manage. I really hate it when my name is gossiped about, Lady.”
“Lady Prairie, I…….”
“You should have been prepared for what would happen when you crossed the line.”
Abigail looked down at her dismissively and bid farewell.
“See you then.”
With that, she stomped on Elizabeth’s foot and left. The pain in her foot was nothing compared to the sting of Abigail’s words.
It felt like confirmation that she didn’t belong by his side. At the same time, shame washed over her for having her feelings exposed to Abigail.
Even though she already knew, Abigail’s words reopened wounds in Elizabeth’s heart.
Elizabeth glanced at the invitation on the table. The invitation was just an excuse; it seemed she wanted to issue a warning.
That she knew all about her feelings and to live quietly like a mouse.
The hot tea had left her collarbone red. It seemed she wouldn’t be able to wear dresses with open necklines for a while.
Elizabeth weakly grasped the invitation. She had to endure until Abigail’s anger subsided.
This gathering would likely be such a place. The perfect setting for Abigail to mock and belittle her to her satisfaction.
Even knowing the treatment she would face there, Elizabeth couldn’t refuse. As Abigail said, she had crossed the line and dared to covet Kiern without knowing her place.
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Imntru
She’s starting to piss me off- grow a backbone you doormat, Christ. It isn’t as if she dragged him there- he followed her out- I hate nobles and their bullshit pride. 🙄