“But Liv.”

“Mm, yeah.”

“Who is that bastard?”

“Who, you mean. Ahh.”

“The one you always bought bread from.”

The question he suddenly asked while ruthlessly thrusting into me as I lay there brought my consciousness, which had been growing hazy, gradually back.

“Hamil-ton?”

When I asked back with difficulty, a cold smile formed on his lips. His eyes, which had always been gentle since returning to the mansion, hardened stiffly.

“You still remember his name.”

I don’t know what displeased him so much, but even while being pounded relentlessly, he managed to form a complete sentence. Despite his tearful effort, when I only let out m*ans instead of answering, his mood finally twisted.

Ernst suddenly changed direction and thr*st down hard. Ahh. At the m*an that reflexively burst out, he showed a satisfied expression. A thrillingly intense shudder struck my entire body. Even so, I needed something to hold onto. I grabbed his forearm, scratching it.

“Ahng. Ah, ah.”

Raw, unrefined cries burst out one after another. I glared resentfully at him for mercilessly pounding my sensitive spot. My tear-filled eyes must have turned red. That hateful face, not caring at all, wore a meaningful smile and began ramming the same spot.

“Ah, ahh. Ahh. Mmmm!”

He drove me on like a beast, seemingly not pitying me as I cried out ceaselessly. What exactly did I do wrong? 

If I’d known it would be like this, I would’ve asked Perillis to lie and say we still needed to be careful with relations.

Even in my frustration, the pleasure that shook my mind dominated me. While cursing him inwardly, my two legs wrapped around his waist diligently struggled to press his lower body against me.

“Hng. Stop, st-op.”

My body shook wildly like a rag doll. Ernst removed the hand that had been kneading my br*ast and gripped my shoulder tightly. 

He bent his waist to press his upper body close and even licked my sharply protruding n*pples with his tongue. Being pounded below while being sucked above left my mind in a daze.

Only when I had no voice left to produce did he thr*st down hard, burying his member all the way to the innermost end. Warm heat spread, and after remaining there for a while, he slowly rubbed our still-connected parts and whispered in my ear.

“You need to forget, Liv.”

Goosebumps rose where the excitement had swept through.

Now, so, this was.

“I told you. You’re mine.”

The touch that swept my sweat and saliva-soaked hair from my cheek was affectionate. And the warning voice was chillingly frightening.

He said he’d been watching me all along, so why doesn’t he know this kind of thing?

“Verbal agreements have no effect, Benefactor.”

“Who said anything about verbal?”

“What?”

My understanding lagged a beat at the voice that sounded gruff and dry. What he just said…

My eyes widened in shock. A faint mischief briefly crossed the face still looking down at me from above. Then instead, his long eyes rippled playfully.

“Are you showing me your pretty eyes right now?”

“……”

“I’m not really curious about that.”

At his teasing tone, tears suddenly welled up. In an instant, my vision blurred without any chance to control it, and Ernst’s smiling face looked smudged.

“Why are you crying?”

“That’s why. Because.”

Unable to continue speaking, Ernst gently kissed my sobbing lips. It was an endlessly tender kiss, not sticky, containing no meaning of carnal desire. Pushing in warmth, melting in comfort.

The tongue that had been devouring me for so long slowly withdrew. In the meantime, my tears stopped. Only my still-reddened eye area slowly cooled under the fingers gently caressing it.

When I showed signs of completely calming down, Ernst whispered softly. His tongue withdrawn but lips still pressed together.

“Not right now.”

My thoughts stopped for the time it took to breathe in twice. If not now, then when exactly? 

Don’t tell me he planned to keep me as his mistress instead of Marquis Karli. Because I’m a commoner too shameful to present to the sky-high Duke. Me.

The feeling that I couldn’t be happier plummeted to hell in an instant. The tears that had barely stopped threatened to flow again.

As transparent water welled up and my lips pressed tightly shut, Ernst gently rubbed my lips that refused to open and gave a light kiss with a smack.

“It’s a bit much to do it looking like this, don’t you think?”

His gaze swept alternately over my n*ked body and his own. Ah… A low sigh flowed from my mouth like a m*an. It was too raw for such an important matter.

While I awkwardly grimaced, Ernst’s eyes became serious. His voice too. I couldn’t help but follow that atmosphere.

I quietly met his eyes in this comfortable silence, seemingly only the two of us existed.

“I told you. You’re mine.”

“……”

“And I’m yours too.”

“Ernst, you.”

“I’ve watched you for a long time and known you for ages.”

“……”

“You won’t have to worry anymore. Rest assured, Liv.”

Instead of saying he loved me, Ernst only repeated the words to rest assured like a whisper. I quietly embraced him. How could I not understand him, who lost his family as a child and had his life threatened all along?

I’m curious about what it means that he watched and knew me for a long time, but I decided to put that aside for now. What’s important is this very moment.

Only the sound of a heartbeat—whose, I couldn’t tell—scattered into the air along the continuing warmth. My body grew drowsy at the touch gently stroking my back and gradually sank below the surface of sleep. Then I suddenly remembered what Perillis had told me not long ago.

‘This is a secret, but you know. Liv, remember when Ernst got shot? Ernst was quite seriously worried then. That you’d run away because his surroundings were dangerous. He pretended not to, but it was so obvious it was funny.’

Perillis had giggled, saying she’d wanted to tell me this for so long. Such a refreshing and even frivolous laugh. It was so different from the image of her I’d known that I could only stare blankly for a while.

After laughing for a long time, Perillis composed her expression. With a somewhat serious face, she continued explaining to me in a gentle tone. This was the main point.

‘And after getting together with Liv, he really wanted a baby with Liv. He said that would give him peace of mind. Do you know how much he harassed everyone around him after finding out Liv disappeared? Remember how I cried when I first saw Liv? Of course it was because I was happy to see Liv, but honestly, I was also a bit relieved thinking Ernst would act like a human being again. So what I want to say is, I’m really glad you came back safely.’

That was why I decided to change what he didn’t know, what he feared. Because I could teach him the words “I love you.” 

Because now I know about him—how he loved me and wished for a child with me in places I didn’t know.

The letter I’d already prepared before Ernst was hidden in the deepest part of the drawer. The letter I’d written right when I returned, to give him on that day coming soon.

<…So please always protect me so I can feel secure. I’ll teach you the words “I love you”—I love you, Ernst.

—To my not-so-gentle Benefactor, who is more gentle than anyone.>

fin.