Ten days had passed since the masquerade ball.

During that time, Clodine barely saw Ahazan.

She never crossed paths with him during the day, and on the rare occasions he came to her room late at night, he would disappear again before dawn after ruthlessly entangling their bodies together.

No matter how frustrated she became, seeking him out accomplished nothing.

Ahazan refused to see her every time.

Had he rejected her indirectly, she might have pretended not to notice and persisted. But his refusals were always so firm that they left no room for interpretation.

Clodine could not understand his behavior.

The unspoken blame and resentment he directed toward her at every turn felt deeply unfair.

That only made it worse, because she had a vague understanding of what he was misunderstanding.

More than once, she had wanted to pound on his door and demand that he come out and speak to her.

She wanted to tell him she would not eat or drink another drop of water until he properly explained what was happening.

But she never did.

Instead of cornering him with her frustration, whenever Ahazan finally burst into her room looking like a man who had endured all he could bear, desperately seeking her body, she accepted him silently with her whole being.

It was not because she understood his actions.

Nor because she felt guilty toward him.

It was certainly not because she loved him so much that she was willing to sacrifice herself and endure anything he did to her.

And it was not because she believed she deserved such treatment.

Clodine was simply still trying to understand Ahazan.

At the same time, she was trying to remember and trust the man he had been only ten days ago.

‘You talk as if saying ‘I love you’ is some promise that can never change.’

‘Honestly, even if it were some grand promise, it wouldn’t matter. Maybe not to others, but you should know this better than anyone. A promise made with words becomes meaningless the moment someone decides to break it.’

‘Wasn’t this exactly what you prepared yourself for when you decided to love again?’

He had said those things.

Yet the warmth he had shown her until now, and the countless times he had risked even his own life to save her, could not be measured.

Like a seesaw, Ahazan’s actions swung endlessly from one extreme to the other—saving her heart one moment and crushing it the next.

After enduring so much confusion, Clodine found herself wondering whether there was some reason behind it all.

Perhaps it was no longer enough to simply call it frustrating.

Perhaps it was something she needed to understand.

What is it that’s throwing you into such turmoil?

Deep in thought, Clodine walked outside with Merian and Valoran following at a respectful distance behind her.

Whenever Ahazan returned after disappearing for days, he always pushed her relentlessly to her limits before leaving again.

And yet, strangely, those merciless nights never felt like punishment.

Nor did they feel like violence.

Instead, through them, Clodine sensed how desperately Ahazan loved her.

It was an enormous contradiction.

But whenever he held her as though he feared overlooking even a single strand of her hair, she felt as though every part of her, even the smallest and most insignificant, had become precious.

There had even been a night when Ahazan came to her heavily intoxicated.

Clodine knew all too well that people who drank themselves senseless often did things they ordinarily never would.

That was something O’Neil Penelope had taught her.

But Ahazan was different.

That night, despite being utterly drunk, he never touched her.

In fact, even when she invited him to lie beside her and sleep, he spent the entire night sitting uncomfortably in a chair, simply watching her until she fell asleep before quietly leaving.

The desire he struggled to suppress while sober—

The desire that had already exploded from him once—

He somehow restrained even while drunk and barely conscious.

If his subconscious refused to treat her carelessly, while his conscious mind insisted on doing so, perhaps the problem and the answer lay not in his heart but in his thoughts.

‘Perhaps it’s actually fortunate if that’s true.’

The thought felt dangerously optimistic.

As one thought led to another, Clodine eventually realized her walk had come to an end.

Beyond the Crystal Palace, the setting sun painted the sky in brilliant colors.

The scenery was so beautiful that it seemed a waste to witness it alone.

Had Ahazan been beside her, she would have stood there watching until the crimson sky faded into violet and finally disappeared into darkness.

Instead, she ended her walk the moment the horizon began to redden and returned to her chambers.

As usual, she ate only enough to ease her hunger.

If Ahazan came again late that night, it would be easier to endure if her stomach was empty.

After her half-hearted meal, Clodine immediately immersed herself in a bath of hot water.

As Merian gently washed her with a bath cloth, concern once again appeared on the maid’s face.

“Your Majesty… you’ve lost weight again. You keep skipping dinner. If this continues…”

Staring blankly at the rippling water, Clodine only looked at Merian a moment later.

Her eyes suggested she hadn’t truly heard a word.

“I’m sorry. What did you say?”

“You’ve lost weight again, Your Majesty. You need to eat properly and get enough rest, but lately you haven’t been doing either.”

A bitter smile crossed Clodine’s face.

It was as though she had laid her body upon the altar of a selfish desire disguised as love and emerged as something else entirely.

She looked over her thinning body as though it belonged to someone else.

As though it caused her no distress at all.

In truth, it was not devotion.

It was little different from abandoning herself.

But Clodine seemed not to care.

“Merian, that man…”

Although Merian’s concern had been directed entirely toward Clodine, she continued speaking about someone else.

“Don’t you think he’s suffering somewhere right now?”

She drew her knees to her chest and rested her chin atop them.

“I don’t know how much he’s suffering, or exactly what’s causing it. But when I see how desperately he avoids me…”

Her voice was so quiet that it seemed to sink back into herself rather than reach the outside world.

“It must mean he’s hurting in his own way.”

“I’m afraid that one day he’ll decide, ‘Maybe I should just let her go’…”

That’s right.

That’s the real reason she couldn’t say anything.

What if she confessed how much she was suffering, only for him to let her go again with the same indifference he had shown in the past?

The thought alone terrified her.

Clodine hugged her knees even tighter.

“If this continues, Your Majesty’s body won’t be able to endure it.”

“That’s not true, Merian.”

Releasing her legs, Clodine spoke as though determined to prove Merian wrong.

“Look closely.”

Submerged in the clear water, she stretched out her arms and legs, presenting her body for Merian to see.

“The nights have been painful. For my body and my heart. I’ve already lost track of how many days it’s been.”

Her gaze lowered.

“And yet, can you believe there’s not a single wound on me?”

It was true.

Although Clodine had visibly lost weight over the past ten days, there wasn’t a single sign that she had been injured or mistreated.

Ahazan always held her as though simple touch wasn’t enough as though he might crush her if he held her any tighter.

And yet, not once had he truly lost control enough to hurt her.

That fact only confused Clodine further.

She couldn’t understand why everything he did, even his most merciless and ruthless actions, looked like love in her eyes.

He could break her heart.

But he could never bring himself to break her.

He might let her go.

But he could not destroy her.

That was precisely why every attempt to resent Ahazan ended in failure.

“But, Your Majesty…”

“Let’s finish the bath.”

Clodine knew exactly what Merian was about to say.

And she was afraid that if she listened any longer, she might end up agreeing with those concerns.

So she chose to end the conversation instead.

If she looked at the situation rationally, none of it made sense.

From beginning to end.

She couldn’t understand why she was being treated as though she were responsible for Ahazan’s suspicions and obsession.

The unfairness of it made her want to scream and demand answers.

She was terrified of nightfall.

Terrified that her entire body would soon shatter under the weight of it all.

And even if Ahazan didn’t come to her room tonight, she knew she would spend the entire night awake.

But still…

It was better when he came.

Despite everything, Clodine hoped he would visit her room again tonight.

Because this was the only way she knew how to keep their love alive.

And then, before dawn that morning—

Ahazan came to see her.