Her sluggish gaze slowly lifted.

She looked from the hand gripping her tightly to her forearm and shoulder, and finally to her throat.

It was only when her eyes met his deep brown irises that she realized it was Raymond holding her.

“Please… don’t.”

“…Do you even know what I was about to do?”

It was a genuine question.

What did this man think she was capable of that made him look at her with such desperation?

His face was pale as he stared at her, as if he might stop breathing at any moment.

In response to her question, Raymond gave her a faint, sorrowful smile.

“No matter what you’ve been through… please don’t throw yourself into that misfortune, milady.”

Tap.

Something slid down her cheek.

Only then did Ilenia realize — she was crying.

The world hadn’t become blurred. It was simply her tears clouding her vision.

She wiped them away roughly. The tears clung to her fingers, devoid of any trace of grace.

Seeing that she wasn’t going to move, he slowly lowered himself to one knee.

Then, taking off his own shoes, he carefully slipped them onto her battered feet.

Her pale feet were a mess . Leaves, twigs and mud clung to them, caked in dirt.

This was the result of running barefoot along roads ruined by heavy rain.

Faint streaks of red showed through. He gently covered them with a handkerchief that he took from his pocket.

The white, yellow-flowered cloth came to rest over her foot.

Ilenia could only stare blankly as the clean fabric slowly became stained.

“It’s dangerous to walk around without shoes. Especially with the roads in this condition after the storm.”

She was fed up with his gentle tone. She despised the way he pretended to care for her, knowing it was all just an act.

Annoyed, Ilenia slapped his hand away.

“…Just leave me alone.”

“I can’t do that.”

“Why not? Ah—because I’m your mother’s patient? Are you worried your reputation as a doctor will suffer if you fail to take proper care of me?”

“Lady Lukehardt.”

“I won’t cause trouble for Marlenda.”

She had never intended to die in the first place.

No matter what she did, Delphius would find a way to keep her alive, so that option had been taken away from her too.

This made everything she was given feel like nothing but excess.

The doctor assigned to her, the maid who attended her.

Even the food placed before her felt like a waste.

“I’ll be stopping soon anyway.”

“And after that?”

Raymond asked quietly.

Still bent before her, one knee on the ground, her foot resting on his thigh, he lifted his gaze to meet hers.

“If you dismiss my mother… what will you do next, milady?”

“There’s nothing.”

There was no hesitation in her answer.

“There’s no need to think about it. Whether I want it or not, everything will be decided for me anyway.”

When had her opinion ever mattered?

A faint, bitter smile slipped from her lips.

Her words could always be ignored — as good as nonexistent.

She didn’t want to hope anymore.

She didn’t want to be disappointed or fall into despair simply because she had dared to hope.

“I just… don’t want to live like this anymore…”

Her voice trembled.

“I don’t want to keep hoping like a fool only to end up hating myself for being disappointed again…”

The tears she had barely managed to hold back welled up again, blurring her vision.

It was all too much.

Her life—Delphius, who refused to let her go; the people who served her, even the doctor who came every day to see only her.

Everything that filled her world had become unbearably overwhelming.

She wanted to go back.

Back to when she knew less, when she was innocent enough not to understand.

Back to Tilea Hill, to waking up in her parents’ arms and whining softly about a nightmare.

‘Mother… Father… I don’t think I was ever meant to be your daughter. I couldn’t endure it. I couldn’t survive anywhere. I want to stop now.’

The moment she impulsively turned her body toward the hill again—

“The sea doesn’t flow calmly like a river or a stream.”

Her body froze.

“The waves crash, raising white foam… and when you watch them, it feels like even your heart is being washed clean.”

“Milady. You said you wanted to see the sea, didn’t you?”

Raymond held onto her foot. As if he didn’t care about the mud and filth, he grasped her slender ankle firmly and spoke.

“Won’t you go see it? When the weather grows warm, when the breeze turns gentle—let’s go see the sea.”

“So you’re telling me to live clinging to another empty hope?”

“Of course not.”

His brown eyes curved slightly.

“I’m asking you seriously, milady.”

His smile was beautiful. It was a different kind of beauty to Delphius’.

While Delphius’s smile was flawless and seemingly crafted, Raymond’s was natural.

His white teeth, set neatly beneath his sharp features, resembled sunlight in spring.

“Let me ask you again. Would you consider going on a trip with me, milady?”

“Why would I do that?”

That was all.

From the outset, Ilenia didn’t belong with Delphius or Raymond.

Despite being dressed in fine clothes and fed the finest food, she was still a woman who didn’t know her place.

That was who she was.

“Do you find it amusing, watching me fall into despair? If you think it’ll be entertaining—to see me believe again like a fool, only to be crushed—then you’ve chosen the wrong person.”

It was time for her to finally understand her place.

To take back the trust she had carelessly given under the ignorance of innocence.

“I can’t trust anyone anymore.”

“You don’t have to believe it. We’ll just set a date.”

Then he quickly added,

“You can forget it after that—it doesn’t matter. I’ll come to remind you the day before.”

“I’ll forget.”

“That’s fine.”

“I’ll say I don’t remember and pretend I never agreed.”

“That’s alright. I’ll remember for you.”

“…Why?”

She truly couldn’t understand.

Why would a perfectly normal man go this far for her?

“Why are you doing this for me?”

“…I’m not sure.”

Raymond lowered his gaze, as if lost in thought.

Her feet were pale—almost as pale as his own complexion. Usually wrapped in soft shoes, they now looked smaller, more fragile.

“To be honest, I don’t really know. You just… keep catching my eye more than anyone else.”

At first, it had been through Marlenda.

“I’ve taken on a noble as a temporary patient. She looks so young, yet her face is filled with sorrow—it was hard to ignore. So, I decided to treat her while she stays in this town.”

That was how Marlenda had explained it.

At first, it felt strange for a nobleman to be staying in a small village like this one. But he soon lost interest. After all, the scenery was beautiful, and it wasn’t unusual for artists or travelers to visit just to admire it.

Then, by chance, he saw Ilenia.

He had been walking along when he spotted Marlenda. Just as he was about to wave, he noticed that she wasn’t alone and stopped.

It didn’t take Raymond long to realize that the person with her was a noble from the capital.

Ilenia matched Marlenda’s description almost perfectly.

Her face was beautiful—

—but it was so heavily shadowed by gloom that her beauty was barely visible.

Even when Marlenda spoke to her, she would only nod or shake her head, offering no real response.

Why was she treating my mother like that?

A flicker of irritation rose within Raymond. But he held himself back and continued to observe.

The longer he watched, the more he realized that Ilenia wasn’t ignoring Marlenda entirely.

Sometimes, she would lean forward slightly, as if listening carefully. Sometimes she would lift her head and quietly study Marlenda’s profile.

And whenever she did, there was a certain emotion in her eyes: Longing.

In those moments, it was as though she were looking at someone else through Marlenda.

For that brief instant, the shadow over her face would disappear.

When he noticed that, he became curious.

Who had made her so sad?

She didn’t seem like someone who was naturally gloomy.

And then, another question arose.

‘What would her face look like once that sadness was gone?’

When Marlenda complained of back pain, Raymond offered to carry her things. When she refused, saying that she didn’t want to be the kind of mother who made her son do such work, he changed his approach.

He told her that he wanted to help her. He said that being by her side would be far more useful than spending his days buried in books.

And so, Raymond became her assistant.

And through it, he was able to meet Ilenia.

With Marlenda’s careful consultations and proper prescriptions, Ilenia began to improve little by little.

Layer by layer as her sorrow slowly peeled away, she started to resemble the person he had once imagined her to be.

When he realized that his imagination had not been far from the truth, a new curiosity quietly took hold of him.

‘What would she be like… once all that darkness disappeared completely?’

After all her pain was gone, he wanted to see what remained at the very end.

That impulse pounded violently in Raymond’s chest.

“So how about this—”

he said quietly.

“You can think of me simply as someone who wishes for Lady Lukehardt’s happiness.”

“…Happiness.”

Ilenia let out a faint laugh.

It wasn’t a smile born of joy—but a hollow, self-mocking one.

“My happiness is already dead.”

She could never be happy.

She was not permitted to be.

It was something she would have to atone for until the day she died.

Her hand brushed against her ear.

As the wind grazed her cheek, she thought she heard the faint sound of a child crying.

“It died… along with my child.”