Chapter 9 (Part 1)

Celestia froze on the spot. Without a thought, she opened the door, and there stood Kayev.

“Kayev…”

It wasn’t a dream. He was standing tall before her, just as she had seen him downstairs a moment ago. At this unexpected reunion, something hot surged up her throat.

Celestia had worried about Kayev endlessly. 

Had he fared well on the battlefield? Was he injured anywhere? 

The letters she had written, knowing they would never be answered, were filled with her concerns and prayers for him.

Had those feelings somehow reached him? Dressed in formal attire for the banquet, he looked perfectly fine—no, he looked splendid. Seeing him like this, Celestia realized once more how simple her heart truly was. Just seeing Kayev’s familiar face made all her past grievances seem trivial, leaving her with nothing but joy and relief.

At that moment, she wanted to throw herself into his arms without a second thought. She wanted to caress the face she had longed to see and kiss him, to confirm with her body that he was truly standing before her.

“Celestia…”

But his voice calling her name snapped her out of her daydream. For some reason, his voice was hoarse. The tenderness and sorrow in his tone briefly filled her heart with hope.

Could it be that the butler’s words were false after all? If he had come all this way to find me, did that mean he still loved me?

Yet, as time passed, her hope began to fade. Kayev’s expression was far too grim for someone who had come to reunite with a loved one.

“Kayev…?”

Of course, at that moment, Kayev was too preoccupied with sorting out his emotions to manage his expression.

When the door opened to reveal her figure, his throat tightened. Unlike when they had parted at the House of Ruden Estate, her appearance was shabby, and her face was gaunt, which pained him deeply.

Would she be startled to see me? Or would she avoid my gaze in discomfort? 

After learning of her betrayal, he had imagined various reactions for their reunion, but none of them matched reality. Celestia simply stared at him in surprise for a long time.

Kayev wanted her to say something, anything, yet at the same time, he feared hearing the truth from her lips. This contradiction mirrored the fierce battle of emotions raging within him.

He wanted to pull her into a tight embrace, and at the same time, he wanted to demand why she had left him. But as he stood before her, unmoving for what felt like an eternity, his resentment won out in the end.

He assumed her silence was due to shock at seeing him. If the butler’s words had been false, she wouldn’t be looking at him so speechlessly. Annoyed by her reaction, he gritted his teeth and spoke.

“What’s the matter? Are you surprised to see someone you thought you’d never meet again?”

Celestia seemed slightly flustered by his cold question. His rising anger clouded his judgment further. Though he knew his behavior was wrong, sarcastic words escaped his lips uncontrollably.

“So, this is your new nest, is it?”

He didn’t notice the visible darkening of Celestia’s expression. His angry gaze slowly swept around the room.

“Did you leave the House of Ruden Estate just to settle in a place like this?”

Indeed, the room she had chosen after leaving his side was unbearably small and shabby. Standing at the door, he could see everything inside—a cramped space filled with a meager amount of belongings scattered about. The simplicity and poverty of her living conditions made his chest ache.

But Kayev ignored the pain in his heart. She was the one who had abandoned the life of abundance he had offered her and left of her own accord.

“If you gave up everything you could enjoy at my estate and ran away, shouldn’t you at least be living better than this?”

Despite his mocking tone, his instincts were on high alert, searching for any trace of Marquis Fenel in her space.

He stepped into the room with his large frame, scanning his surroundings, but found nothing unusual. Still, his mood remained foul. The lack of evidence didn’t erase his suspicions. The thought of Marquis Fenel using his position as her former fiancé to come and go as he pleased infuriated him to no end.

It wasn’t just the room that displeased him. Everything about her—her clothes, her belongings—was an eyesore. At a glance, none of the items he had given her were visible.

Was Celestia treating everything we had shared as nothing more than a forgotten past? After sharing her body and heart with me, had it all become memories she could simply discard?

“Impressive. Well then, why don’t you tell me the grand reason you left me to settle in such a fine place?”

Mixed with his rising anger were other emotions that churned his heart into chaos. Jealousy, worry, longing, and desire all tangled together, making his mind a mess.

Kayev found himself unable to stop the hurtful words spilling from his mouth, even as he felt conflicted. None of it was sincere. While it was true that he was angry, he had never intended to lash out at her like this upon their reunion.

In truth, it was the opposite. He had planned to persuade her, no matter what. Living without her seemed unbearable, even if it meant burning himself alive with jealousy. He thought it would be better to forgive her and have her back.

But the tender words he had rehearsed so many times had vanished, leaving only a foolish man angrily lashing out. And his behavior struck Celestia’s heart painfully.

“…Have you said everything you wanted to say?”

As he paused to catch his breath after venting his anger, Celestia quietly asked in an oddly calm tone.

She couldn’t understand half of what he was saying. Too overwhelmed, his words didn’t fully register in her ears, nor could she grasp their meaning. The only thing she knew for certain was that Kayev was angry with her.

Whatever had angered him, Kayev was clearly furious. His piercing, fiery gaze made her abandon her last shred of hope.

If there had been any misunderstanding between them, he wouldn’t have been this angry. It was evident, as the butler had said, that he had wanted her out of his estate for some reason—likely something as significant as his marriage to the princess…

Misunderstandings piled up endlessly.

Celestia stopped thinking. She didn’t know why the very person who had ordered her to leave in such a cowardly manner was now furious about her current living situation, but there was no point in trying to figure it out.

She had already made peace with her feelings and only wanted to disappear far away. The old Celestia might have reacted impulsively to Kayev’s audacious behavior, but not now.

However, the two years that had passed had drained even the energy to be angry from her, and the wounds that ran deeper than her anger had instead calmed her heart. Pain seemed to have matured her.

Celestia let out a deep sigh, calming the emotions that had been stirring within her. She didn’t want to become unnecessarily agitated in front of Kayev, whom she hadn’t seen in so long. Meeting those gray eyes, burning with heat, only seemed to cool her head. She had nothing left to lose, no place left to retreat to.

As her mind cleared, her emotions became sharper. The hatred had already evaporated, leaving only the pure essence of her love for him, like shards of gold dust in her heart. Celestia sighed deeply in her mind. Even after all this, she still loved him.

“What is it that has made you so angry?”

She looked him straight in the eye and asked calmly.

Her face even carried a faint smile, as if to say she didn’t care about his anger. Though her lips trembled slightly from tension, she managed to form a perfectly serene smile.

Why frown when meeting after so long?

Celestia thought simply. After all, aside from the circumstances and emotions, wasn’t this a face she had longed to see? She was genuinely happy to see him.

“What…?”

But her composure felt entirely different to Kayev. Her unexpected reaction left him visibly flustered.

Kayev had at least expected her to feel deeply apologetic toward him. He didn’t want to suffocate her with guilt, but he hadn’t imagined she would act so indifferent.

The Celestia standing before him wasn’t the woman he remembered. A new expression, an unfamiliar confidence, adorned her beautiful face. Her gaze was far deeper than before, steady as if unshaken by any storm.

He felt something close to fear.

Why had she changed so much? Who had made her this way? Could it really be due to Marquis Fenel? 

The suffocating weight of the thought made his throat tighten.

Kayev hated the woman standing in front of him. More accurately, he hated the Celestia he didn’t know. She was so different from the woman he remembered.

The fact that she had changed in his absence was a shock. If someone had influenced her enough to bring about such a transformation, he hated that even more.

“You, you…”

Throughout the war, he had missed her. He had planned to hold her in his arms and cherish her if they were to meet again. Now that his status had been restored, he had even prepared to formally propose and make her his wife.

Though he had been devastated to learn she had left the estate of her own accord, he had resolved to persuade her, no matter what, if there was even the slightest chance. But the new Celestia before him wouldn’t follow him, no matter how desperately he pleaded. He was certain of it.

He was, quite literally, terrified.

“Why… why on earth…?”

If he could, he wanted to ask why she had left him. But he couldn’t finish his sentence. For some reason, his throat tightened.