Chapter 6

At this moment, when unexplainable relief and fear came rushing over her all at once, Lizette wanted to know, whatever reason this man held. She wanted to know why the heart of that man, who looked as though he had never once in his life done anything not of his own will, had changed. The corner of Killian’s lips drew into a curve.

“A week ago, you were desperate for me, and now you have the leisure to question the reason?”

It was not sarcasm. Killian had become purely curious. Curious about the woman before him who, though he was offering her the opportunity she wanted, was questioning the soundness of that opportunity.

“You saw just now, so you already know. I have no such leisure. I simply need trust in you, Your Grace, who can change your words as easily as turning over your hand in only a week.”

Contrary to her delicate appearance, she had quite a sharp tongue. Killian nearly laughed out loud. Instead of laughter, the corner of Killian’s eyes bent briefly. Lizette’s bold answer, entirely beyond anything he had expected, pleased Killian rather a lot.

‘Even in a situation like this, reason and trust…….’

At the word reason that came from Lizette’s lips, Killian ended up recalling an old memory. It was a past he never wanted to repeat. The truth that the scene he had witnessed just now had called to mind both someone’s obsessive love and death was not something she needed to know.

So Killian tried to think of a fitting reason that Lizette would accept. A reason that would not wound the woman before him, a reason that would resolve at once the anxiety and tension held in those round eyes.

‘Ah, that will do.’

Killian’s gaze drifted from Lizette’s face to her neck and then to her fingertips. Holding a faint smile at the corners of his mouth, Killian said,

“Now that I have thought it over carefully, it seems you were right.”

“What?”

“You said it yourself, did you not. That if I married you, I would gain a pretty lady.”

“Th, that was.”

Lizette’s face flared red. The embarrassing memory she had only just managed to forget came vividly rushing back. Whether he was teasing her or speaking sincerely, either way was troubling. Seeing Lizette’s reaction, Killian laughed.

“You admit that you’re pretty. That’s why I keep thinking about you.”

“You’re making fun of me right now, aren’t you?”

“I’m not particularly gifted at saying things I don’t mean.”

The reason she kept coming to his mind was because of the handkerchief he had failed to return and the lavender scent left behind by that ownerless handkerchief. But Killian glossed over it suitably.

“Is this really the time for jokes?”

“I’m not joking. Then let me give you a reason that will be a little easier for you to accept, Miss. In just the past week, I’ve been introduced to about eight young ladies as potential brides.”

Killian said it. It was a reason he had hurriedly come up with, but it was not a lie. The elders of the Senate had persistently tried to place the brides they favored at Killian’s side as his wife. The same was true of the capital’s nobles who had daughters of marriageable age.

“As you said, I’m not that idle. It seems these tiresome marriage talks will continue in the future as well, so I thought I might indulge in a whim as a temporary measure. Does that count as a reason?”

Only then did Lizette nod, but of course she did not believe that the reason Killian gave was the whole truth.

Still, if his whim at this moment was genuine, Lizette wanted with all her heart to be swept up in that whim. And so she had no choice but to ask Killian for something else.

“I’ll trust you. But I want you to write a contract.”

“A contract, huh. Do I give such an untrustworthy impression?”

“What if you change your mind again in a week, Your Grace?”

Before the benefit granted by Killian’s incomplete whim came to an end, Lizette wanted to put some kind of safeguard in place. It might have been reckless of her to show such nerve when she still desperately needed him, but fortunately, Killian merely smiled without looking displeased.

“You want me to prove that my whims are not common?”

As though he were thinking of something, that single remark from Killian carried a strange note. His gaze held Lizette firmly. The moment she met his eyes, she felt a silent pressure and a strange flutter all at once.

“First of all, it would be proper to propose before anything else.”

“A proposal?”

At the unexpected word, Lizette’s voice trembled faintly.

Not long ago, she herself had calmly said the same thing to him. But hearing the words now from his lips left her dazed, and somehow made her heart tingle.

“Let’s get married.”

At the moment the words she had longed for so much flowed from his lips, fear and hope mixed together and came surging toward Lizette.

* * *

“Miss!”

Early morning. Neris’s voice, usually never one to rise, was heightened to the fullest. At her nursemaid’s unfamiliar tone, Lizette forced her heavy eyelids open.

“This is no time to be sleeping. Get up and look at this!”

The fingertips of Neris, who was shaking Lizette’s shoulder to wake her, were trembling. Through Lizette’s still-blurry vision, a thick envelope edged in gold kept appearing and disappearing.

“……What is that envelope?”

“Miss, that’s what I want to ask you. Duke Cedric has sent a letter of proposal!”

Excited, Neris looked far more animated than usual.

“So it wasn’t a dream.”

Lizette murmured blankly. The things that had happened to her yesterday somehow felt detached from reality. Even until the moment she lay down in bed and closed her eyes, she could not believe it. Lizette had wondered several times whether she was dreaming before she finally managed to fall asleep.

‘Or is this all the dream.’

“……It hurts.”

One cheek she had pinched several times before falling asleep still felt heavy. Before the faint warmth in her reddened, slightly swollen cheek had even faded, Killian had kept his promise.

The maids of the estate busied themselves going in and out of her room, arranging the gifts Killian had sent. Dresses from a famous dressmaker arrived filling an entire carriage, and another carriage that came after it was packed with splendid jewels and accessories.

For a brief moment, Lizette felt relieved by Killian, who left her no room even to doubt his promise before proving it. But as she watched the unending procession of gifts, she found herself thinking without realizing it.

‘Even so, this is too much, Your Grace.’

There were too many. At a glance, every one of them looked expensive. This was not even a real marriage, so she could not simply accept everything he gave her exactly as it was.

“Record everything that comes in and store it separately, Neris.”

Lizette was happy for Killian’s kindness, and yet it felt unfamiliar. She had never properly had anything of her own before, so she did not even know how to receive the feelings someone gave wholly to her alone.

Killian’s overflowing kindness was heavy and sweet. It was exactly that frightening, unfamiliar, and yet in the end, a tenderness she could not refuse.

‘It’s only kindness I’m borrowing for a while, but it’s warm.’

Warm sunlight streamed in through the still-unpacked boxes. Just as she was beginning to go blank at the sunlight, which felt especially gentle today—

“Miss, what would you like to do about lunch?”

“I’ll eat in the dining room.”

“Really, Miss?!”

Neris’s eyes widened. Whenever the Marquis and his wife were away from the estate, Lizette had always eaten alone in her room except when Graham called for her. Lizette had always wanted to live in this household like a shadow.

“Yes, I’m going downstairs.”

At Lizette’s clear expression of will, Neris nodded and, as if by habit, handed her a veil. Taking the veil, Lizette, unlike usual, did not put it on at once, but instead ran her fingers over the rough black veil.

—Do you wear that veil to hide, or to hide yourself away?

—……

—If it is not a choice made entirely for yourself……

—Pardon?

—There is no need to do something you do not want for the sake of others. That is what it means to become my wife.

“Throw the veil away, Neris.”

At the same time that the light texture vanished from her fingertips, Lizette felt as though she had been freed from shackles that had bound her for a long time. She left the room with a strangely refreshed heart.

When Lizette arrived at the dining room, the long table had been neatly set with a meal for only one person. After confirming Graham’s absence, her expression became noticeably more at ease. She had prepared herself, but she could not cast off discomfort built up over so long all at once.

‘Graham is so quiet that it makes me even more uneasy.’

He had shut himself up in his room since yesterday. She had expected him to cause an uproar as soon as Killian left, but for whatever reason, he had been as quiet as a dead mouse.

In the sunlight pouring down without restraint, Lizette forcibly erased thoughts of Graham little by little.

‘Let’s not think about it.’

After she steadied her heart with effort, the maids standing with their heads deeply lowered started to bother her this time. Their manner was extremely cautious, and if they so much as met Lizette’s eyes, they flinched and trembled.

‘Is my face really that hard to look at? He said I was pretty.’

Lizette thought of Killian telling her she was pretty. A faint smile rose on her face.