Chapter 25

After crossing the border of the principality, Estelle arrived at the western edge. She settled safely in a small rural town overlooking a vast coastline, spending just over a month there.

She walked to the clinic to treat her limping leg, certain that she would never walk as she once did and would have to rely on a cane for the rest of her life.

But that was all. Estelle did not pity herself or feel unhappy about her situation.

Her only discomfort was difficulty walking, but as long as she had her cane, she could walk on her own.

She had no trouble managing her daily life.

Upon reaching the clinic, she met the only doctor in the rural town. The elderly man, who had worked as a noble’s physician in a distant land during his youth and had also trained other doctors, was well-known for his skill.

He had returned to his hometown to spend his final years and, finding there was no doctor in the area, opened the clinic to share his talents. He charged for treatment, but the fee was small enough that anyone could use the clinic without worry.

When Estelle arrived, the old man started a light conversation and spoke with her for ten minutes. Since settling here, Estelle had unexpectedly started teaching a few children basic arithmetic. Many families lived off fishing near the coast, so when fathers went out to sea, childcare fell entirely to the mothers.

So, while helping her neighbors with childcare, she sometimes ended up teaching as well. Having received a high education as a Lady, she knew much more than the common folk. Teaching reading to commoners was against national law, but arithmetic was allowed.

In every country, there were commoners who lived by commerce, and for those from the lowest classes, it was often the fastest path to success.

After finishing her conversation with the old man, Estelle showed the inside of her wrist.

She visited the clinic every week at the same time to have her leg, numb from nerve poison, examined.

Today, when the doctor checked her pulse, he tilted his head. Noticing the unusual reaction, Estelle unconsciously swallowed dryly. She hadn’t dared to hope for recovery, but she couldn’t help reading too much into the doctor’s actions.

It could easily be the opposite.

‘Could it really get worse here?’

A few days ago, while eating vegetable soup, she felt nauseous and immediately vomited. She wasn’t sure if this was related to the symptoms of the nerve poison, but since the toxin had passed through her esophagus, it was possible.

Tensed up, Estelle stiffened as the doctor removed his fingers from her wrist and asked,

“Have you been feeling dizzy or nauseous lately? Are you skipping your menstrual cycle?”

The doctor’s question struck Estelle like a blow to the chest. Her period was overdue, but there were no signs. If she skipped again, it would be the third month, but she hadn’t suspected anything because of the nerve poison.

Even before the doctor gave his diagnosis, Estelle furrowed her brow, guessing at something. It had been two and a half months since her last intimate time with Raphael. When her escape plan failed at the western villa, she hadn’t been able to take her contraceptive tea… Even then, she and Raphael had been close often.

Because Raphael had released so much inside her, it was almost impossible for Estelle not to become pregnant; ironically, it was only the nerve poison that freed her from the anxiety of pregnancy.

Would a powerful nerve poison, which nearly took her own life, really leave the child in her womb unharmed? If she had been in the early stages of pregnancy, she would surely have miscarried.

She believed she wasn’t pregnant since there were no major symptoms besides her numb leg….

Estelle’s eyes widened as she belatedly responded to the doctor’s question.

“Yes. Lately I haven’t been feeling well, and I keep skipping my period. Am I… pregnant?”

“‥‥‥.”

The doctor paused for a moment. Instead of answering, he seemed to decide to examine her again, carefully checking her pulse as he had before. Soon….

“I can feel another pulse alongside yours. In most cases, this means pregnancy, and no matter how many times I check, it’s the same. Congratulations. You’re pregnant. The baby has survived the nerve poison. I can hardly believe it, but it’s true.”

Even after more than fifty years of practice, this was the first time the skilled doctor had encountered such a case. Although Estelle hadn’t overdosed on the nerve poison, it would have been difficult for the baby to survive while Estelle was unconscious.

The child clung tightly to life in the womb—it was nothing short of a miracle.

Estelle was left speechless by the doctor’s diagnosis. The embarrassed doctor wrote something down and advised her to visit a larger clinic immediately.

No matter how skilled the doctor in this rural town was, it was difficult to obtain the necessary medicines for prescriptions. Estelle needed medication, and for both her health and the baby’s safety, she should visit a bigger clinic where prescriptions could be properly made.

When the doctor handed her the written medical opinion, Estelle accepted it in a daze. She still couldn’t believe she was pregnant.

‘There’s Raphael’s child in my womb…?’

The fact that she carried the seed of someone she had to bury in her heart forever brought a surge of indescribable emotions.

Unable to put it into words, she lowered her head and looked at her flat lower belly. There was no sign of pregnancy yet.

The doctor informed her that she was about thirteen weeks along. In the early stages, the baby’s pulse was too weak to detect, so the doctor had only now realized.

Estelle set the medical opinion aside for a moment and gently stroked her lower belly with one hand. If she had learned of her pregnancy while returning to the ducal Main Residence with Raphael, she would surely have been devastated…. But now, discovering new life in a place where she had started anew, she felt something deeply moving.

Would God grant her a gift so she wouldn’t be lonely, since she could never set foot in the Empire again and had to hide her identity in a foreign land?

She felt her nose sting and frowned. She now had a reason to protect this peaceful life. She wanted her future child to grow up carefree and happy.

Estelle raised the corners of her mouth, trying to hold back tears.

***

Five years had passed since Estelle left the Empire. In that time, Raphael had become so broken inside that it festered, but outwardly, he maintained a dignified appearance. The wild rumors about him and Estelle faded within three months of her funeral.

Last year, after inheriting the Dukedom and becoming Duke, Raphael received a flood of marriage proposals, but he continued to refuse, using the excuse of learning administrative work. In truth, the former Duke could have remained head of the family for another ten years if he wished, but Raphael had suddenly inherited because the Duke had died.

There were rumors that Raphael had manipulated things from behind, but the truth was that the Duke had fallen from his horse while riding and broke his neck. There were multiple witnesses, and Raphael himself openly revealed the cause of the Duke’s astonishing death, but it was so absurd that it became the subject of gossip. People wondered if the Duke’s pitiful death was part of a conspiracy….

Raphael held the Duke’s funeral only four years after Estelle’s, but he did not grieve or shed tears. This fueled more rumors. At that time, Raphael even wondered if Satan had come to take his father away unexpectedly….

He wished, in fact, that his own breath would stop as well, but the heavens seemed to want him to suffer longer and did not take his life. Looking back, when Estelle left him, she had no lingering regrets, but she never wished for his misfortune. There was no parting message wishing him well, but her final expression seemed to say just that.

Live an ordinary life.

So, ‘s*icide’ and ‘ordinary’ never matched, and even though the former Duke died, Raphael could not end his life. He decided to accept the punishment Estelle had given him and chose to become obsessed with work.

He could have drowned himself in medicine and alcohol, but Estelle’s wish for him not to fall further into ruin kept him from doing so. He had to use every possible means to distract himself.

There was nothing better than work to stop thinking about her. Swordsmanship could also help him forget, but he couldn’t spend all day in the training hall.

As usual, in the morning, Raphael buried himself in his office, checking documents. Since he began leading the Dukedom, the family’s prestige had grown day by day.

The days he spent buried in work to forget reality returned as an unexpected reward. Of course, Raphael had no interest in whether the Dukedom’s reputation soared or not. He simply did whatever it took to avoid being consumed by the overwhelming desire to see Estelle.

Surprisingly, Raphael had never tried to find out where she was. If he started searching, his longing would grow uncontrollably, and he would probably rush out to meet her. He endured this every day.