She spent twenty years being born and raised here, so why did she feel nothing at all?

If she were to name a feeling, it was not grief or shock but something closer to liberation.

Does that mean I no longer have to paint?

Can I paint what I want to paint?

Not paintings that hold value in the world the tribe wants, but truly what I want.

Not paintings I draw every day without rest, but paintings I draw when I want to?

But how?

If the tribe fell, Lani had nowhere to go. She had no parents, no siblings.

Only the clanspeople who saddled her with enormous responsibility because she was a genius.

“Lani!”

Someone found her. The white-haired old woman was the tribal head, Shulan.

“Come here, quickly!”

Shulan came rushing over and grabbed Lani by the arm with rough hands. Lani was pulled along limply, going wherever she was dragged.

Shulan took Lani to the outskirts of the village where the fire had not yet spread.

“This is the one.”

Shulan pointed Lani out and introduced her to someone. The group wore strange masks, and they were raiders.

“Please spare the lives of the remaining clanspeople. There are still young children.”

“This is really the woman who painted those paintings?”

“Yes. You can verify it right now.”

Shulan looked frightened that the leader of the raiders might cause further harm.

“Lani is a genius born once in several generations.”

Shulan added and pushed Lani forward.

“Come closer.”

The leader pushed Lani’s tangled hair aside to check her face and gave a nod.

“Take her.”

The carriage carrying Lani merged into the raider group. Ron, a member of the tribe and Lani’s friend, was made to drive the carriage.

But before long, the carriage plunged off a cliff.

***

As the night deepened, Kahar’s mind grew sharper. Sleeplessness was his normal, and he felt nothing in the silence of the night.

Absurdly, today was not a day entirely soaked in thoughts of Lani, and that difference unsettled him.

Since meeting Meliciel, there were times when thoughts of Lani grew faint. He could not deny it was because his attention was spent on Meliciel.

Kahar was someone who could treat anyone beside him like they were invisible.

Yet he personally put Meliciel on his own horse and took genuine pleasure in watching her struggle. Purely.

Was it right for thoughts of Lani to grow faint? No, it was not right.

He wanted to forget. No, he did not want to forget.

He wanted peace. Did he even deserve peace?

“Lani…….”

Even saying her name was this hard, and he thought he could forget?

A stinging pain traveled up from the past and scraped at the inside of his throat.

Lani, gone without a trace. Her death was Kahar’s fault.

He should have read Viviana’s intentions more keenly. He was a fool, lost in his first love, and failed to look around him.

He could not even protect Lani, and yet wanting to forget her and live in peace was itself a betrayal.

How on earth did Meliciel find out about the killing sickness and about Lani?

If she used people to dig persistently, she might have found out. Lani was not a woman Kahar needed to hide.

The question was whether Meliciel had that kind of power. That was the doubt.

“She’s exhausting.”

He simply did not want to invest deep thought in her. Meliciel was not at a level where she could even harm him.

And he was already spending too much mental energy on her simply because she resembled Lani.

Kahar sat on the sofa in the cabin all night, waiting for the night to pass, when a sound from the direction of the bed made him lift his closed eyelids.

Having Meliciel nearby only made his mind more unsettled.

Meliciel collapsed limply a short while ago. He caught her as she fell, laid her in the bed, and clicked his tongue at Huby’s diagnosis that she was simply asleep.

Strange woman. And a woman who resembled Lani.

The dangerous Meliciel who sometimes made him forget Lani.

“……Ron?”

Meliciel murmured softly. Was she waking? He watched her movements, and she climbed out of the bed.

The way she staggered was unsettling.

“Don’t, don’t go…….”

Meliciel reached into empty air and shuffled forward. Like someone sleepwalking, she kept repeating don’t go as she searched for the door.

“What’s happening?”

Kahar asked, but she acted like she could not hear him. She reached the door, fumbled for the lock, and opened it.

“Stop.”

The rain was still pouring. The wind was stronger than before, and going out carelessly could mean real danger.

“Don’t go…… Ron.”

Ron? The corner of Kahar’s brow lifted.

“Ron…… don’t leave me.”

She was calling the name Ron with the tenderness of someone calling their first love.

Kahar pressed his dry, stiff eyes shut for a moment, and in that time Meliciel opened the door and stepped outside. She was a nuisance in every way.

He considered calling a servant, or calling a guard, then rose from his seat.

The future Grand Duchess seemed to be sleepwalking, and there was no need to let more people know that.

It was more efficient to follow her himself than to summon his resting subordinates.

Kahar got up and threw a cloak over himself. He pushed open the door that did not fully close and stepped outside, and the sound of the rain hit him more intensely.

“Meliciel.”

Kahar called and searched for her. She was already out of sight in the brief moment, and he felt a jolt of alarm.

He judged she could not have gone far given how slowly she moved, but even after looking around, Meliciel was nowhere to be seen.

“Where did she go?”

Kahar turned quickly and checked the other direction. A fierce storm was blowing, but he had a talent for making out shapes in the dark.

He caught a faint glimpse of Meliciel’s hem. He moved fast, not wanting to lose sight of the violet, fish-scale shimmer of her clothes, and called out.

“Meliciel!”

But she disappeared into the fierce wind and the forest.

D*mn it. Kahar moved nimbly and ran in the direction she went. Meliciel was moving with sudden speed, like she sprouted wings.

She was always just out of reach. Every time he stretched out his hand, she was already far ahead.

It felt like chasing someone through a dream, and Kahar had to curse under his breath and run faster.

“Stop!”

He barely caught Meliciel and shouted, and only then did she slowly turn to look back.

Her face was hidden in the dark and hard to see. Kahar touched the magic stone on his sleeve ornament and brought up a light.

It was not very bright, but a soft glow settled around Meliciel’s face. Her blankly blinking eyes were still distant, wandering somewhere far away.

Kahar questioned her in a voice that came out slightly rough without him meaning it to.

“Going out in the middle of the night to find a first love?”

She did not answer, and knowing it was unlike him, he asked again.

“Tell me. I’m asking if you’re looking for a man you can’t forget.”

Whether it was the effect of the violent weather, Kahar was behaving like he wanted to bite her.

“What do you think you’re doing, waking up in the middle of the night like this? Do you want to die? Is that it?”

The grim sound of Kahar’s voice finally reached Meliciel, and she slowly began to come to her senses from where she was submerged in the dream.

The fierce rain was still beating down on both of them.

Kahar raised his arm and made a small roof with his cloak, but it was not enough to hold back the driving rain.

“Where…… why am I in a place like this?”

Meliciel asked in simple bewilderment. Anger was written on Kahar’s face as he pushed his rain-soaked hair back.

“Did something happen?”

“I want to know. You suddenly ran out in the middle of sleeping. You wouldn’t listen when I called.”

“I did that?”

“Are you a sleepwalker?”

Meliciel shook her head to say she did not know. Her feet were always clean, so she probably was not a sleepwalker…….

Then the memory came back in a rush. Cooling her hand in cold water, arguing with Kahar, and then losing consciousness.

“Did I faint again?”

“Yes. You have a talent for startling people every time.”

Kahar looked around and pulled Meliciel toward him.

“The embankment near the entrance is collapsing. We need to get out quickly.”

“Yes.”

Meliciel nodded and followed where he led for now. But Kahar’s feet stopped before long.

“Water’s already risen. We’ll have to go around another way.”

“Will the other way be safe?”

“The rain should stop by morning, so it’s better to take cover until then.”

Kahar took off his cloak and draped it over Meliciel’s head. It was a gesture that felt both apologetic and burdensome to receive, but she had no confidence in enduring the rain without it.

More cold rain and Meliciel would be back in bed sick. The cloak was larger than her body, and it weighed her down.

“Let’s hurry.”

“Yes.”

The rain was so heavy she could barely see ahead, so she gripped his hand tightly to keep from losing him.

Kahar seemed to pause for a moment, but then quickly began moving again.

As time passed, Meliciel’s jaw began to ache from shaking so hard. The cloak could not keep out the rainwater that rose to mid-calf with every step.