Isn’t this too significant a matter to add as a ‘P.S.’? While I believe you’ll certainly refuse, are you really planning to get married? Ah, of course, I trust your judgment. You’ll be busy preparing for auditions for the time being, so surely not.

However, since there are ‘what ifs’ in the world, I request a detailed explanation for the sake of your faint-hearted friend.

The humidity is getting higher. On days like this, the takeoff distance gets longer and fuel consumption increases. It’s a season when aircraft performance deteriorates, so the rookies are tense. Although airplanes are strictly machines, in this aspect, aren’t they similar to people?

I’ve become tense for a completely different reason. You know the reason better than I do.

I’ll pray that no heat disturbs your sound sleep.

July 10,

From your devoted fan.

P.S. I’ve ordered a large quantity of the stationery and ink that you said was easy to read. Perry, please don’t worry too much about it.]

[To my worried friend

It’s terribly hot, Yuan. At least the temperature drops at night, making it somewhat bearable.

Whenever you mention the weather and worries about me, I find myself smiling alone. Who’s worrying about whom? I wonder.

After all, you’re the one traveling to places much colder and much hotter than Roju.

I’ve been reading magazines about airplanes in my spare time. I didn’t understand everything, but I certainly learned that airplanes are extremely dangerous spaces where all sorts of emergencies can occur.

Yuan, are you really alright? You’re always so nonchalant about your own affairs. Keep in mind that just as you imagine my days, I imagine yours as well.

As for marriage—good heavens. I never thought you’d worry about such a thing! Ah, I’m absolutely not reproaching you.

I sent a letter telling you not to worry, but ended up sending a new worry instead. I’m sorry. I naturally omitted that I wouldn’t go, but if I’d known you would misunderstand like this, I would have explained in detail from the beginning.

It really wasn’t anything special. This kind of pressure isn’t new. Since before I came to Roju, it’s been over ten years now.

My parents’ wishes remain constant. To quit uncertain and dangerous work like acting and live a stable life with a reliable person—like a village school teacher, perhaps?—keeping house. Their argument is what I could possibly do with my ‘unsound eyes.’

I don’t agree with even a tenth of it.

They still think my lifestyle is just childish stubbornness. No matter how many times I explain, they refuse to listen all hundred times. It’s like talking to a wall, you know?

In the past, I wouldn’t have even opened the envelope, but it came under my sibling’s name, so I thought maybe…… But it was as expected.

It only mentioned they had selected good marriage prospects, without a single line asking about their daughter’s wellbeing. How many more times must I speak before they understand me? Probably never. I didn’t write back.

I’ve gone on a bit long. I didn’t want to talk about depressing things.

Let me emphasize once more that I have no intention of following my parents’ wishes. I won’t quit being an actress, nor will I marry someone I’ve never met.

If there’s one thing that bothers me…… it’s that their love is ‘real.’ Out of genuine desire for their daughter’s success, out of eagerness for me to live respectably, they back me into a corner. When faced with that overwhelming love, I feel like a wooden board caught in a storm. Not even a fish or seaweed, just debris that’s broken and decayed, unable to become anything.

Have you ever felt like that? The loneliness of going right when everyone else goes left. The anxiety of doubting yourself, wondering if you’re just being stubbornly odd even though you’re clearly following the path you want. Do you know this kind of bewilderment?

Well, I’ve rambled on, so don’t take it too seriously. I’m not trying to act spoiled. It’s just that, Yuan, you’re my friend.

That’s why I told you.

That’s all.

July 14,

Thinking of a friend, Perry.]

[Dear Perry

After visiting a desert city, Priton’s air feels unusually humid. The sandstorms were so irritating that if I shake the shoes I wore that day, sand would still pour out.

My reply has been quite delayed. I’ve been somewhat busy these past few weeks. It’s already a busy vacation season, and when a rookie suddenly resigned, we had to rearrange the schedule…… then a family gathering was scheduled on top of that.

I had intended to skip the family gathering, but when Grandmother personally sent a telegram, I had no choice but to go.

Would you believe I didn’t even have time to go to my company quarters? As you can see from the postmark, I’m writing this reply from Grandmother’s house in the capital. I’m opening your letter for the first time since retrieving it from my mailbox.

I’ll stop making excuses here. My circumstances aren’t important.

At the family gathering, I was with Grandmother, my aunt, and cousins. The ‘advice’ I hear every year inevitably became the main topic.

The elders in my family don’t approve of what I do. They simply cannot understand why I voluntarily do such difficult work.

The fact that I became a captain at the youngest age in civilian aviation history means nothing to the elders. And I simply let their advice go in one ear and out the other.

I don’t quite know why I’m so stubborn about this. Perhaps it’s unresolved rebelliousness from my school days?

I’m not sure. Perhaps I’ll never know……

So, it might sound funny to say this, but.

May I dare say that I ‘understand’ you, Perry? That word sounds so, so arrogant. I worry that my hasty consolation might hurt you……

Ignoring such anxiety and confessing—a little, just a little…… I think I understand.

I probably haven’t told you what kind of family I grew up in. It’s somewhat complicated. Though different from your case.

Having to witness the remnants of a fiery love until the very end…… It’s not a pleasant anecdote, so I’ll keep it brief. But staying in such an environment, and then leaving it, I might have felt the loneliness you mentioned—

Yes. This is too meager to be consolation. I’m sorry.

I want to be your strength, but I’m not sure how. I’m just, embarrassingly, borrowing the courage from the wine I just drank to confess.

I was glad that you told me when you’re feeling lonely. We are surely very different people, but still, that you thought of me, that single fact made me very happy.

I’ve just rambled on about nonsense. Perhaps tomorrow I’ll write a new reply.

July 23,

Your friend.

P.S. You once said that you’re very good at finding your way, that even after wandering and getting lost, you reach the right destination. I believe in that Perry.]

[To Yuan

I want to thank the wine that gave you a push!

Receiving such a sincere letter probably means the awakened Yuan showed more courage? Or perhaps some clueless relative mistook your tightly sealed letter for an outgoing mail and dropped it in the mailbox.

Either way, it’s welcome news to me. To hear such a genuine confession, and from none other than Yuan!

The corners of my mouth are rising all the way to my temples. Probably not a good expression for anyone to witness.

Let me say in advance, don’t be too embarrassed about sending this letter. With Yuan’s personality—though I can’t be certain—I suspect you’ll be clutching your head for days, thinking you’ve done something foolish.

But I liked it.

I genuinely liked it.

Partly because I feel closer to you, but…… in truth, everyone must solve their own worries, right? Even if a third party offers a solution, ultimately the choice and execution belong to oneself.

What I mean is, to summarize,

Just sharing these inner thoughts is enough. None of us are fretting over problems that will end in a day, are we? We’re simply sharing and listening. Even though who knows how many secrets may be hidden between the lines.

I hope you’ll trust me a little more.

Ah, and one more thing!

You talked about stubbornness and such, but as someone who has been truly stubborn for a long time, I can assure you that you’re a very moderate and thoughtful person. You even politely endured uncomfortable meal times.

Moreover, when the path arranged by your family has none of your input, isn’t it stranger to follow it?

I’ve felt this before, but you seem—how should I put it—extremely diligent. You never missed homework during school days, right? And you put effort into taking notes even in classes where everyone else was sleeping.

I hope that as you read this letter, you’re in your peaceful sanctuary.

July 25,

Sending the purest friendship, Perry.]