Even when I let Leopold go from D’Agnon, I believed he stayed with me only out of guilt. I was convinced that his refusal to have children stemmed from not loving me deeply enough to want such a connection.

‘I didn’t think I could make you happy. You wanted a child, didn’t you? But I had no desire to have children at all… So I tried not to get attached… I thought if I made your life difficult, you’d soon get tired and leave.’

I thought it was an absurd excuse.

‘I don’t want to see you have a child you don’t want, especially if it causes you pain.’

‘What if I’m okay with it? Then there’s no problem, right?’

‘I’m not inclined to go that far.’

I was frustrated with him for not giving a proper reason for his refusal.

‘Can’t you change your mind for me? I want a child.’

‘I’m sorry. That’s truly the one thing I can’t do.’

I felt hurt by his flat rejection.

I didn’t realize I shouldn’t have felt hurt.

And yet, he was telling the truth.

It made sense that Leopold couldn’t defy his mother. It wasn’t just because of her injured leg; he had become the child who killed his father.

The pain I saw in him was devastatingly miserable. I couldn’t even begin to fathom how it felt to live a life never escaping that burden.

How awkward he must have felt watching me cheerfully say I wanted three children. How tormented he must have been, unable to tell me the truth about why he didn’t want children. If he had become the child who killed his father before he was even born, I would have hidden it too…

My legs gave way. Just before I collapsed, I managed to lean forward and grasp the edge of the bed.

I hadn’t discovered anything yet, except that Leopold’s power was incredibly strong. So, I couldn’t let myself get lost in emotions like this.

I steeled my mind as if casting a spell. What I needed to do now was gather any small piece of information about his magical power.

I reached out again. The trembling wouldn’t stop. Gripping my right hand with my left, I released my magic once more. Then I quickly traced the remnants of the powerful waves. Since the incident in his childhood, there seemed to be no record of him using his power properly until he became an adult.

Several scenes passed, including various battles on the border and the expulsion of the Ice Land natives. The problem was that I wasn’t the one wielding the power, and I couldn’t hear any proper auditory information, which limited my ability to gather clues.

I was anxiously retracing memories for quite some time when I saw Leopold standing on a large magic circle I had never seen before, his hands clasped in prayer and eyes closed. It seemed to be the moment he was trying to turn back time.

Right after my death.

I hesitated for a moment. Then, unlike before, I began to examine each of Leopold’s memories. Perhaps I could find out not only a clue about his power but also the reason he turned back time.

***

Isabel, who had been irritable all along, seemed worried for the first time as she tried to stop him.

“Leo. Think about it again. This is just throwing your life away. Life and death are not areas humans should meddle with. Even if you do this—”

“We’ve already discussed everything.”

Watching Leopold sharply cut her off, Isabel held her head.

“Ha. I won’t live to see my natural end.”

“I will proceed.”

He showed no hesitation. As he spoke, a red light outlined his body. It spread from the inside of the return magic circle drawn beneath him to the edge of the circle, following the complex lines exactly. As the entire magic circle glowed red, Leopold let out a groan.

“Leopold!”

Isabel called out to him urgently, startled. But the return magic was only just beginning.

“I’m… fine.”

It felt like his heart was being tightly bound by chains, making it hard to breathe. He had to endure until the light of the magic circle completely disappeared, but the pain was so intense he feared he might succumb to it without realizing it.

Leopold felt he was reaching his limit when the turbulent flow of magic suddenly calmed, revealing a familiar space before his eyes. There stood the silhouette of the woman he missed so desperately, gazing out the window with her back to him. The scene was as unbelievable as the surreal pain he felt.

He instinctively knew it was their first night as newlyweds. But why was he seeing Hazel’s time instead of his? The question lingered only briefly before he realized the truth as he watched Hazel waiting for him  all night, unable to sleep. The return magic worked in the most cruel and unbearable way for the caster.

With a heavy heart, Leopold approached Hazel. She lingered by the window, looking at the high moon, occasionally picking up a book from the table and flipping through it absentmindedly or adjusting her clothes. Then she sat on the sofa, nodding off, only to wake with a start, looking around to confirm she was alone, and then sighed deeply. As morning came, she finally went to bed, trying to sleep on her own. The loneliness etched on her wounded face was unbearably painful.

“I’m sorry for leaving you alone, Hazel…”

Leopold knelt beside her, tossing and turning, and quietly apologized. But naturally, Hazel couldn’t hear him. She was a presence he could never reach, and her sweet scent existed only in his memory. The fact that she was visible but not tangible made him even more desperate.

Eventually, darkness engulfed his vision. When he opened his eyes again, the red glow that had followed the return magic circle had completely vanished.

“Are you alright?” Isabel asked, her voice tinged with concern. He managed to nod slightly.

“Go back and rest now. You need to conserve your strength.”

“…I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Even speaking was difficult. It wasn’t a matter of physical strength, but of maintaining his mental composure. He had dreamed only of turning back time to make Hazel happy, but the reality of reliving time was something else entirely…

Leopold barely moved his feet to leave the academy. As soon as he arrived at the mansion, he headed to Hazel’s bedroom. Everything was just as he had seen in his dream, except for the absence of Hazel.

Was it just his imagination that the bed she had lain in seemed unusually large? He approached, unconsciously gripping the neatly arranged blanket tightly. And he vowed never to ignore the pain she had experienced.

The next day, after fulfilling his duties as the Duke of Lawrence, Leopold returned to the academy. Since he couldn’t guarantee when or how his life would end, it was better to start preparing for the afterlife now. It had been a tedious life, but knowing there was an end brought a slight sense of relief.

After enduring Isabel’s inevitable nagging about whether he really needed to cast such an extreme spell, Leopold finally stood on the magic circle. He couldn’t understand why she insisted on stopping him when she already knew his resolve was firm, but Isabel was the only one who could help him, so he didn’t oppose her.

On the second day of their marriage, Hazel was meticulously taking notes on her duties as the lady of the house while being shown around the capital mansion. Peter, who usually stayed at the estate mansion, had come to the capital due to the special circumstances.

“Um, Peter… Has Leopold not returned? I didn’t see him yesterday…”

“His Majesty summoned him.”

“Oh, I see…”

It seemed like a question she had mustered the courage to ask, but Peter offered no additional comments, only a short and straightforward answer. She wanted to reprimand him immediately, but she remembered that it was Leopold himself who had instructed him to respond that way, to make it seem like a boundary was being set. Of course, this was just the beginning.

By dinner, he used his mother’s insistence on having at least one meal together each day as an excuse to sit across from Hazel. Her scent, which had always tickled his nose, oddly irritated him that day. The artificial smell, reminiscent of social gatherings, completely masked Hazel’s fragrance. With a cold tone, he casually remarked, intending to convey that no cheap perfume could compare to her scent.

“It reeks.”

Her face, initially trying to interpret what he meant, gradually turned red. She soon looked completely shocked and said nothing.

Damn bastard.

Leopold instinctively reached out to grab his own collar, but there was nothing to grasp. Hazel lowered her gaze, trying not to meet his eyes, and barely managed to swallow her food.

With a terrible feeling, Leopold approached her and muttered frantically, as if in apology.

“Hazel, this isn’t how I truly feel. I’m sorry, really, really sorry… I just preferred your scent, but that crazy bastard… Ha… Hazel, I, what have I done…”

In the end, he knelt and bowed his head. He began to understand why Isabel had described it as excruciating.

He would have to face the woman suffering because of him, the woman who would never see him begging for forgiveness, every day for the next five years.