Days passed. She couldn’t remember how she had spent that time.

Vivianne walked alone through the rose garden. Unable to bear being alone in her room any longer, she had wandered outside, letting her feet take her wherever they would. The day after meeting Kian, she had slept the entire time.

Though she tried to act like nothing had happened, she kept dozing off while playing chess with Marchioness Baldwin.

“Vivi.”

“…”

“Vivi!”

“Y-yes? What?”

“It’s your turn. You’re as weak as a sick chick. What’s been wrong with you all day?”

“I couldn’t sleep last night. I’m sorry.”

Of course, she couldn’t explain why she hadn’t been able to sleep.

On the second day, her mind had been completely adrift. She tried to read, but the words wouldn’t register, causing her to flip back and forth through the same pages repeatedly. 

Mealtimes were no different. Though she couldn’t tell whether food was entering her mouth or nose, she made an effort to eat. If she merely picked at her meals, Marchioness Baldwin would surely question what was wrong.

Vivianne instinctively checked whether her water glass contained champagne instead of water. 

She usually ate a piece or two of the chocolate served for dessert, but she hadn’t touched any in days. The mere sight of chocolate made her recall Kian’s kisses, driving her nearly mad.

By the third day, regret and self-reproach washed over her. How could she have mated so easily with a man whose past with her remained unknown?

‘No matter how I look at it, it was insane.’

Was the impulsively consumed champagne to blame?

But Kian had kissed her first. No, had she initiated it?

To be precise, after his surprise kiss when offering champagne, Kian had continued to plead and ask, and ultimately she had permitted the kiss by returning it.

‘I never intended to kiss him.’

Indeed, she hadn’t even planned to meet him. Though curiosity had led her to peek at him, she never meant to become so deeply entangled.

Even while asking if he could kiss her, his lips had already brushed against hers. He was truly a wicked, mischievous male.

‘Why did I drink that champagne?’

Why had she consumed alcohol she never usually drank, especially in front of such a dangerous man?

‘I should have refused until the end.’

The more she dwelled on it, the more she wanted to hit herself on the head.

Vivianne recalled Kian’s brazen words:

“You’ll have to come get your panties yourself.”

How outrageous. Surely he wasn’t still keeping them?

“Tell Baron Grieam you want to see Kian.”

How could she possibly say such a thing?

She wasn’t particularly close with Baron Grieam, and she felt awkward after Angela’s outburst. When he had slapped his daughter’s cheek and then checked on her condition, Vivianne had been mortified.

It was all because of Kian. She absolutely couldn’t say she wanted to see him.

Kian had also tempted her with the puppy, bathtub, and chocolate.

Honestly, she did want to see the puppy. The sensation of its fluffy fur and the way it wagged its tail while licking her face lingered in her mind.

‘An, he called it.’

Kian’s “An,” Vivianne’s “An”—named after syllables from both their names. Given how it was named, it must have been a puppy they raised together like a child. The fact that she wanted to hug it just from remembering suggested this was true.

As for enjoying bathtub baths, were bathtubs only available there? Baldwin Manor had them too. Did he expect her to undress there again for a bath? His impure intentions were obvious.

Chocolate she didn’t even want to look at for a while. It had been one of her favorite desserts, and she resented Kian for turning it into something she now avoided.

Oh, if only she could go back to before Kian kissed her. Now, every recollection brought only embarrassment and distress.

“I’ve gone mad. Completely mad.”

Vivianne muttered to herself repeatedly while thumping her head with her fist. She hadn’t realized it when she was drunk, but now that she had come to her senses, she felt terribly embarrassed, like someone who had emptied an entire box of chocolates by herself.

“Vivi, why are you out here alone?”

Just then, a familiar voice came from behind. Turning around, she saw Theodore’s face.

“I just came out to pick some flowers for the vase. I didn’t want to bother you.”

“It’s no bother. I’m bored because you haven’t called for me. Please bother me a little.”

Theodore smiled good-naturedly. Seeing his expression, Vivianne couldn’t help but smile in return.

“Did something happen?”

“N-no. Why do you ask?”

“You just seem distracted lately.”

“Me?”

“I’ve been calling you from behind for a while. Didn’t you hear me?”

She truly hadn’t heard him. Being too absorbed in her thoughts was the problem.

“Something definitely seems to be troubling you.”

“N-nothing’s wrong. Really!”

Her desperate denial suggested otherwise. Theodore didn’t press further, simply watching her silently. His gaze made her feel even more guilty.

“Um, Theo.”

“Yes?”

“Will you keep a secret if I tell you?”

Vivianne clasped her hands together and spoke in a pleading tone.

“I’m asking you to listen because I need someone to talk to. The Marchioness would be furious if I told her, and while Josephine is kinder, she would likely tell the Marchioness everything.”

“…”

“Angela dislikes me, so I have no friends now. I thought it would be nice if you could be my friend.”

“Being friends might be difficult.”

“Why? I like you. Do you dislike me?”

That couldn’t be true. Theodore even remembered the first time she had asked him to be her friend, when she had come to the knights’ quarters filled with dark-complexioned men, putting him in an awkward position.

“It’s not that I dislike you. I dislike becoming friends.”

“Why?”

“Because friendships can sour at any time.”

Theodore knew this better than anyone. How useless the word “friend” could be, and how changeable such relationships were. Even his relationship with Kian, whom he had grown up with like a brother since childhood, had deteriorated.

He recalled the day he confessed to her that he never wanted to be friends and that he too was a man.

“I am someone who protects you, Vivi. No matter what happens, that won’t change.”

“Thank you, Theo.”

Vivianne smiled radiantly, like a blooming rose.

“So I can keep your secret too.”

“Really?”

“Yes. Even if we’re not friends, we can still talk.”

“Then could you lean down? I’m worried someone might hear.”

There was nobody around, but she kept looking around nervously, genuinely afraid of being overheard. Theodore bent his knees to accommodate Vivianne, who was standing on tiptoe.

“A few days ago, I met Kian.”

“Kian?”

“Oh, you probably don’t know him as Kian. I’m sorry. Duke Larson. The day you rescued me… you remember him, right?”

He wasn’t asking because he didn’t know. But Vivianne had no way of knowing that. Theodore’s face hardened.

“When did you meet him?”

“A few nights ago. I suddenly found myself in a carriage that took me to where Kian was.”

“To Larson?”

“No. He said it wasn’t his home. I’m not exactly sure what it was, but it seemed like a place he was staying temporarily because of me.”

She rambled nervously as she spoke.

“Remember when you embraced me that time? When I asked him why he did that, he said we… had been deeply in love. And…”

She paused briefly.

“He said I disappeared while he was away from home. He had been searching everywhere and finally found me. He said he still loves me deeply and can’t live without me. He seemed so desperate.”

From Kian’s perspective, this wasn’t untrue, but what Vivianne had experienced wasn’t something to be spoken of so lightly.

“But why can’t I remember anything? They say I fell into the sea. Was it an accident? If not… there must have been something truly unacceptable that happened. What if that’s the case?”

Would Vivianne still speak so calmly if she knew the truth?

He had even shackled her ankle. How unbearable must it have been for her to consider escaping while pregnant?

She was a tender-hearted woman who couldn’t even leave the puppy behind. Seeing her now showing interest in Kian again, the same woman who had begged tearfully that she was scared and didn’t want to return home, made his chest tighten with distress.

“Theo.”

“…”

“Theo?”

“Why… did you go alone?”

“Pardon?”

“It could have been dangerous. Didn’t we agree that you would call for me?”

“Ah, well…”

Vivianne scratched the corner of her mouth, finding the question difficult to answer.

“I intended to, but I suddenly found myself in the carriage without knowing what was happening. I didn’t have a chance to call you. I should have refused to get in until the end. It just happened… I was thoughtless. I’m sorry, Theo.”

Had he questioned her too harshly out of frustration? She kept apologizing though she had done nothing wrong.

“I won’t go again. I thought I might remember something if I asked him, but it only left me feeling unsettled. Besides, the Marchioness dislikes him, calling him ill-mannered.”

“Are you sure you’re fine not going?”

“Yes. I’m content with my current life. The Marchioness treats me well, and you’re here too. I even enjoy chatting with Josephine.”

Should he feel relieved? Vivianne’s face brightened as she stated she wouldn’t meet Kian again.

“Aren’t you curious about your past?”

“I am curious and want to know. But… my feelings have changed a bit.”

“Why?”

“Whatever happened, the past shouldn’t ruin the present.”

Far from feeling reassured, he grew increasingly uneasy. Even if Vivianne felt this way, Kian would never back down so easily.

And that premonition came true with frightening accuracy.