“What do you think, Marian or Anthony?”
“I don’t know.”
“I mean, what do you call the baby when you’re alone?”
“Just baby. Baby. I call it ‘my baby’ or ‘little one.'”
We don’t even know the gender yet. How could I have decided on a name?
“I see. My baby. Could I touch it just once?”
Vivianne hesitated briefly before slowly nodding. Kian placed his hand on her round belly and cleared his throat.
“Little one.”
Something moved beneath her belly. The baby kicked.
“Was that a kick just now?”
“Yes. It happens sometimes.”
“Does it recognize my voice?”
“Hardly. Maybe the baby dislikes you just like I do.”
She seemed upset that he had presumptively brought his face so close.
“What should I do? The more you say you dislike me, the more drawn to you I become.”
“Are you a pervert?”
“You just realized that? Or did you forget?”
His bright smile somehow looked dangerous.
She must have let her guard down after not seeing him for so long. Being alone with him might lead to something happening, just like that dinner at the townhouse.
“I-I want to go for a walk. My legs don’t hurt anymore. Staying in the room all day makes me feel stuffy…!”
“Let’s do that. Where to? Since far places would be difficult for you, how about a simple garden walk? Or should we take a carriage for some fresh air?”
There was no hint of coercion. He asked for her opinion on each suggestion.
“You’re being so obedient. Just like An.”
“You mean the puppy?”
“Yes.”
An would wag his tail and lick for attention, but when commanded, he would show tricks like ‘sit’ or ‘play dead.’
The similarity was striking: being clingy and smooth-talking one moment, then massaging her legs when asked or promptly getting up to go out without complaint when she wanted to. Vivianne found this extremely pleasing.
“You don’t like it?”
When Kian let out a dry laugh, Vivianne quickly asked.
“No, I suppose I am a son of a b*tch.”
Being compared to a puppy. It certainly gave him mixed feelings, but seeing how she liked it, he decided to accept it gracefully, assuming she meant it as something cute.
Vivianne, who had been sitting with her legs stretched out on the bed, looked for her shoes.
“Need help?”
“No thanks.”
“Alright.”
A son of a b*tch should act obediently like one. When the master commands, rebellion is forbidden.
Perhaps because her belly had grown so large, she couldn’t see her toes well. Her struggle to put on her shoes in one attempt was unbearably adorable.
“Hold on.”
Kian went down to the floor and crouched in front of Vivianne.
“It’s okay. I can p-put them on myself…”
“Just wait a moment.”
Despite Vivianne’s protests, he helped her put on her shoes.
In that moment, she recalled when Kian had first put his slippers on her feet after she had lost her own shoes.
Vivianne’s face turned bright red.
“There.”
After putting on both shoes, Kian stood up and held out his hand.
He seemed to be offering to help her stand.
“I’m fine.”
She knew she was being strange. After inviting him herself, she kept getting irritated once she saw his face. Was there still resentment left? Maybe she just wanted to act spoiled or petulant.
“If you don’t want to take my hand, shall I carry you?”
“…I’ll take your hand.”
Though she reluctantly took it, Kian’s hand was warmer than she expected.
* * *
After a long labor, Matilda announced the news of Vivianne’s delivery.
“How is the mother? Is Vivi alright?”
Kian, who had been anxiously waiting in the reception room, first asked about Vivianne’s wellbeing.
“Yes, master. The doctor says both mother and baby are healthy.”
“But the labor was so long. Vivi must be exhausted. Are you sure there’s no problem?”
“She endured it bravely. Please don’t worry too much.”
Although she assured him everything was fine, he wouldn’t be at ease until he saw for himself. He tried to enter the delivery room but was naturally refused, and he couldn’t even wait outside.
All he could do was pace around the reception room, praying for a safe delivery.
He didn’t believe in God. As a child, he would pray out of habit because of Matilda, but not after he grew up. He always thought God was never on his side. When facing harsh realities, it was easier to expect nothing at all.
He believed it was better to resign himself from the start than to have his hopes shattered. That was how Kian had lived his life.
But today, he decided to follow Vivianne’s example. Even if it all crumbled like a sand castle, he would hope and pray. That’s how desperate he was, putting his whole heart into it. Like a drowning man clutching at straws, he prayed fervently.
It was just like when he worried she might turn to sea foam. He was concerned about her giving birth with her frail body that was often sick.
Please don’t take Vivianne away, he begged. Even if she couldn’t stay by his side, let her remain in this world happily.
Because faith, even without guarantees, was stronger than resignation. He decided not to fear believing, just like Vivianne.
Even so, wasn’t it a miraculous thing?
He could hardly believe a baby was being born from that small body.
“Aren’t you curious about the baby?”
Matilda kept trying to engage the still-anxious Kian. She wanted to share the good news.
“Right. The baby… how is the baby?”
Matilda was about to speak but seemed overcome with emotion, breaking into a touched smile.
“Marian von Larson.”
“What?”
“Vivianne asked me to tell you this.”
“…Vivi decided on that name?”
Kian asked in disbelief. Even when he had asked what name she would choose, she had primly answered “my baby.” Not only had she chosen the name he had suggested, but she had also added the Larson family name.
That meant surely…
“Yes, from her hair color to her eyes, she’s a princess who looks exactly like Vivianne.”
Was this an answer to his prayers?
As he had hoped, it was a girl.
She looked exactly like Vivianne. That another being as lovable as her had been born was nothing short of a blessing. He wanted to hold that precious life in his arms right away.
She had willingly agreed to live for the sake of saving an undeserving man. Above all, he was grateful to Vivianne for enduring such a difficult process.
Kian could barely contain his excitement, clenching his fist tightly.
“And ‘Anthony von Larson,'” she added.
“What do you mean?”
“Don’t you know? I heard it was a name you had chosen, master.”
Of course he knew.
“Certainly. Anthony was the name I had chosen for a son, if Vivianne had given birth to a boy…”
Matilda nodded with a broad smile. Kian’s eyes widened instantly as he realized what she meant.
“Congratulations, master. There’s also a very handsome prince. Vivi gave birth to twins.”
* * *
Leaving the twins with a wet nurse, they went out for the first time in a long while.
When asked where she wanted to go, Vivianne told Kian she wanted to see the coral beach.
The sea, which they hadn’t visited for a long time, remained unchanged. Since they had left rather spontaneously, the sun was already setting. The scene reminded her of that day just before the red moon rose. Looking back after everything that had happened gave her a fresh perspective.
Vivianne took off her shoes and walked barefoot on the white sand. The sensation of small waves tickling her toes still felt pleasant.
Seeing how her toes felt more familiar than fins, she realized more deeply that she had truly become human.
“You won’t run away, will you?”
Kian asked with anxious eyes, like someone watching a child they had left by the water.
“I wonder. Should I go in and see if my tail grows back?”
When his face turned pale, Vivianne chuckled.
“I won’t go. How could I leave Marian and Anthony? And An too.”
“What about me?”
“You’re an adult. Adults are supposed to manage well on their own.”
“Yet you called me a kid before.”
She’s so arbitrary.
Kian let out a snort of laughter. He had been cautious for a while. Now they could at least talk and laugh together.
The room with the taxidermy had been thoroughly cleaned out from the beginning. Once he learned Vivianne was a mermaid, he couldn’t leave it as it was. The mermaid bodies were properly taken care of and returned to the sea. He even called a priest to perform a ceremony to comfort their souls.
It took courage to tell her about this. He worried it might stir up bad memories, but it was also clearly an issue that needed to be resolved.
He decided to focus on asking for forgiveness rather than receiving it. He thought of all this as karma he needed to bear.
Vivianne was silent for a while. During the period when she hadn’t replied to his letters, he had no idea what she was thinking.
What had happened couldn’t be undone. Some might say it was pointless now, but he wanted to do his best.
“Coming here reminds me of when I was young.”
“When you were young?”
“Yes, I only remembered it recently. When I was little, I met a very pretty girl here.”
“How pretty was she?”
“Like an angel. I fell for her at first sight. Probably my first love.”
“Why are you suddenly talking about this?”
Vivianne’s face turned slightly sulky.
“Just because. Ever since I remembered, I can’t stop thinking about her whenever I come here. I can’t forget her.”
“…”
What was she supposed to do with this information?
Why was he suddenly talking about something she had no interest in? It was absurd.
Maybe it was because she was feeling hot. Her feet felt uncomfortable for no reason. When Vivianne stomped her heels, water splashed in all directions.
“Are you angry?”
“Why would I be?”
“You are angry.”
“No, I’m not. Don’t falsely accuse me.”
She didn’t want to look at him, but she wasn’t angry. What was there to be angry about? Let him think about his angel all he wanted. Would such an angel even bother with a scoundrel like Kian? It wasn’t worth thinking about.
When Vivianne ignored him and walked ahead, Kian followed and grabbed her.
“You are too. You’re stomping around.”
“Let go of me, ah…!”
As Vivianne tried to shake off Kian, she lost her balance and fell forward. He reflexively caught her, preventing her from falling, but her skirt was soaked up to her knees.
“See? You almost fell.”
“…”
“Are you hurt anywhere?”
Even though she kept her lips tightly sealed and wouldn’t respond, he casually checked if she was injured.
“You’re all wet. My Vivi, you’ll catch a cold.”
Kian quickly took off his jacket and wrapped it around her waist to cover her wet skirt.
“Should we go in and clean up? The mansion is close.”
“…”
“Are you not going to talk to me?”
Vivianne nodded. She expressed her intention but didn’t speak. She seemed thoroughly upset.
“Alright. I’ll confess the truth. First, get on my back. Let’s go clean up.”
“…I’m not interested.”
“Vivi, are you stupid?”
“I’m not stupid.”
As her lips pouted, his lips came down on hers briefly before pulling away.
“It was you. You. I was talking about you.”
“What?”
“When I was young, you saved me. That’s what I was talking about.”
“…”
She recalled the story of saving a sacrificial offering when she was young. Although she had heard the whole story from Alice, she sometimes forgot because she had lost her memories and it didn’t feel real.
Come to think of it, they were destined for each other.
Just as she was about to indulge in tender sentiments, Kian seized the opportunity to tease her gleefully.
“So suspicious, and so jealous. But being jealous of yourself is a bit much, don’t you think?”
How embarrassing! Vivianne’s face turned bright red.
“Um, I’ll get on your back. I’m cold. Hurry!”
“Yes, princess.”
As soon as she turned her back, too embarrassed to face him, he picked her up on his back. Finding her adorable, Kian could barely contain his laughter.
“Will Kian… not change?”
As they walked toward the mansion, Vivianne, who had been quiet for a moment, carefully asked.
“What do you mean?”
“Just… I’m afraid you might go back to how you were before.”
She was happy now but also anxious. She feared the happiness she had finally grasped might be fleeting.
“You worry about the strangest things.”
Kian hitched Vivianne up higher on his back, and she tightened her arms around his neck.
“I probably will change. No, I definitely will. Nothing in this world stays the same.”
“…”
“But it’s because I changed that I can carry you on my back now. So I intend to keep changing.”
Vivianne wanted to hear more of what he had to say, continuing to listen quietly.
“I’ll love you more tomorrow than today. Is that okay?”
“We’ll see about that.”
Despite her prim answer, a chocolate-sweet smile spread across Vivianne’s face.
“I told you then. Wherever your compass points, I’ll be there.”
“You did.”
“So you need to tell me one by one how to make you happy. Understood?”
Vivianne nodded again. Instead of answering, she nuzzled her forehead against Kian’s nape.
Who had been caught in the trap?
They were each other’s trap.
Carrying sweet bait, they were helplessly drawn to each other, falling in before they knew it. Tightly interlocked, the more they moved, the deeper they cut into each other’s skin. Perhaps that’s why they couldn’t part ways despite such a fateful entanglement.
Yet they were each other’s only salvation.
Like a ray of light in the dark abyss where no light penetrates. Chasing each other, they rose to a place where sunlight shines.
And so, they willingly chose to bind themselves to each other. Sometimes it would be burdensome. Sometimes it would feel constricting, and they might feel suffocated.
But that was okay. It was okay to make mistakes. What mattered was that they couldn’t let go. If they made mistakes again, they could simply retie the knot prettily, like the ribbon in her hair.
He decided to no longer distrust life, and she decided to no longer seek happiness in her imagination. Instead, they chose to face each other directly.
The sun had set, and though darkness had fallen around them, it wasn’t dark. The moonlight was unusually white tonight.
It was a perfect, full moon.
Fin.
Thank you so much for reading and supporting this novel!
Translator
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pickle3
maybe now the whole sacrifice thing will change to just getting mermaids and humans getting married, just choosing who turns into what is the question i guess.
maybe?