Now It’s Your Turn to Regret

Chapter 87: Princess Charlotte

“How did you know that, Shasha?”

Princess Charlotte knew about the “Blue Rose.”

“Just because I create the rose doesn’t mean it harms me. I’ll be fine after some rest.” But that wasn’t the issue right now. The priority was to soothe her and get her to take the Blue Rose somehow.

Yet Princess Charlotte shook her head.

“Liar.”

Her tear-filled, watery eyes trembled fiercely.

“……”

“I know everything. Everyone from the House of Blossomweaver died young. It was all because of the Blue Rose… What if you die early because I take it? What if you die like Mother did… I don’t want that.”

Edelweiss looked at the sweat-drenched Princess Charlotte in concern.

“Mother died because of me, so I don’t want you to… I don’t want anyone else to die because of me…”

Her voice, speaking about the late Empress Anastasia, was calm.

That made it all the more heartbreaking for Edelweiss. It was a tone only those familiar with sorrow could carry.

You’re still so small and young… just how much guilt have you lived with?

Edelweiss couldn’t not know—because she had carried that same weight on her own shoulders.

Princess Charlotte briefly closed her eyes, then opened them again with a rapid exhale. Her breathing grew rough and then calmed, repeating the cycle.

Soon she spoke again, as if it were nothing.

“I really wanted to meet the baby… I wanted to play with them so you wouldn’t be tired. My brother raised me until now, so I really wanted to be a good aunt. That’s why I studied hard, even when I didn’t want to… There’s so much I want to give the baby…”

That innocent voice felt like a fading hope that could never be reached.

Princess Charlotte looked as though she were quietly making ready to leave.

“Please … don’t talk that way. You can do all those things—so please, just this once, will you take it for me?”

Princess Charlotte only gave a mischievous little grin.

“If you try to feed it to me I’ll spit it right back out. I won’t swallow it—ever. Come on, Sister, pull yourself together. You’re expecting a baby; you can’t keep throwing yourself away like this. You’re a mother now. You should be thinking about the baby, not me.”

The words struck Edelweiss like a hammer to the heart.

“Ah … ”

Was this what true heartbreak felt like? The emotions she had held back crumbled all at once, and she couldn’t find her voice.

“Sister, listen—actually, this is a secret. I really wasn’t going to say it, but if I don’t tell you now I think I’ll regret it later.”

The confession trembled with the fear that there might never be another chance.

“I felt most at ease when I was with you. Father cherishes me, yes … but it’s not really me he loves—it’s Mother he misses, and he only calls for me because I remind him of her. That’s why I started acting like Mother.”

She tried to speak lightly, pitch rising at the end of each sentence, but she couldn’t hide the sorrow woven through her words.

“Still, I’m lucky. If I hadn’t resembled Mother, Father probably wouldn’t have cared for me at all.”

Something deep inside Edelweiss tightened painfully.

Charlotte had always known—everything Edelweiss had hoped she’d never need to know—and yet the little princess had never once let it show.

“And Brother is wonderful, but you know how mean he can be. When we’re together he just calls me ‘colt’ and tells me not to do this, not to do that … Honestly, I’m scared he finds me a nuisance too.”

Living her whole life thinking she must play substitute for Empress Anastasia—changing anything about herself that wasn’t the same.

“Shasha,” Edelweiss whispered, “even if you looked nothing like Her Majesty Anastasia, I would still love you.”

How lonely … unbearably lonely must her world have been?

At those words, a faint smile touched Princess Charlotte’s lips.

“I know”

“….”

“Even if you never said it, I always knew—you like me. You never get angry when I play pranks. When you look at me, your eyes are full of affection, and the hand that pats me is always warm.

When I fell and got hurt, you looked more pained than I did. How could I not notice that? You’d have to be silly not to.”

Tears rolled down Charlotte’s round, white cheeks.

“So sometimes… I was jealous of your baby. I was scared you might not like me the way you do now once the baby’s born. That’s terrible of me, right? I’m sorry…”

It sounded as if she were begging not to be disliked. Edelweiss wiped her own tears and steadied her voice; she felt she wouldn’t manage a single word if she let her emotions spill over.

“I had no idea, truly. You always talk so sweetly to the baby. And even if you did feel that way, it isn’t wrong—it’s natural. I felt the same. Sometimes I wished I were the only one, so I could have all the love to myself. Does that make me a bad person too?”

Charlotte slowly shook her head.

“No. You’re a kind person.”

“….”

“Because you’re kind, I wanted to be kind to you and the baby too. I didn’t even realize I felt this way until now—maybe your kindness covered up my bad feelings and hid them.”

Her words soaked into Edelweiss’s heart like drops of water.

“All the things I wished I could do if Mother were here—I did them with you. You gave me everything.”

“….”

“This is a secret I haven’t even told Brother… sometimes I wished you were my mother.”

Every time she exhaled, every time those lovely, sea-colored eyes met hers, Edelweiss couldn’t stop the surge of emotion. She squeezed her eyes shut, clenching her hand.

Charlotte reached out and clasped Edelweiss’s hand.

“Sis.”

“….”

“I hope the baby doesn’t have the power to create blue roses. The baby will be kind like you and might make a lot of roses. If I were here, I could tell the baby not to—but I won’t be, right?”

“Ah…”

“I heard children of the Blossomweaver family are named after flowers.”

“……”

“My name… even my name, was taken from my mother. That’s why I hate the name Charlotte.”

If ‘Anastasia’ is rendered in ancient language, it becomes ‘Charlotte’.

So it wasn’t just that she wanted to be called ‘Shasha’ as a cute nickname.

“That’s why, for the baby… instead of a flower name… how about Gloria? Gloria means ‘to shine brightly’. So the baby knows they don’t have to resemble someone to shine, that they’ll be loved not because they remind someone of another…”

Was that the kind of love Charlotte had always longed for?

“It might only suit a girl’s name. If it’s a boy, hmm…

…Strangely, nothing comes to mind….”

Charlotte’s breaths grew fainter.

In that moment—

Bang!

The door burst open with a loud crash.

“Charlotte!”

It was Damian’s voice.

With heavy footsteps, Damian stormed into the room, followed by panicked maids and a physician.

“…It’s a relief… that Brother has a family now…”

Charlotte’s fingers dropped limply to her side.