When Regret Strangles Your Throat

The blessing of a spirit.

Usually, receiving a spirit’s blessing meant that the recipient could wield some of that spirit’s power.

This means that Jaina can now harness some of the power of the Spirit of Light, the king of all spirits.

“Oh my…”

The exclamation slipped from her lips without her realizing it.

Elysion looked at her with an unmistakably smug expression.

“You were not blessed by some ordinary spirit. You have received the protection of the great Spirit of Light. You should be grateful.”

“I truly am grateful, Lord Elysion.”

Jaina nodded earnestly as she replied.

Her sincere response seemed to please him greatly. He rubbed the tip of his nose with his index finger and asked casually.

“I’m thinking of going to the human world. Do you need anything? Since you know my name now, I suppose I can bring you something.”

“You’re going out again? I thought you said you hated the human world.”

She tilted her head slightly in confusion.

“I—I’m bored.”

Although it was clear that he wanted to go for her sake, he spoke as though that were not the case. There was something unexpectedly endearing about the way he tried to hide it, which caused a faint smile to curve her lips.

“I suppose you already know, but I’ve run out of fruit.”

“Fruit? There are only a few pieces of bread left as well.”

“That’s enough to last about three days…”

“That’s exactly why you look like you’d collapse if someone flicked you with a finger.”

Elysion’s brows twitched in exasperation.

“You’re lucky there’s no strong wind in the Village of the Spirits. If you stepped into the winds of the Forest of Monsters, you’d be blown clear to the outer edge.”

“It’s not that bad.”

“Start eating properly from now on. You’re cultivating this land to survive, aren’t you?”

“Yes. But I only just planted the seeds. It will take some time before they can be harvested, so I thought it would be better to ration what I have until then…”

She added that she did not think it proper to keep asking him to fetch food for her every time.

Elysion let out a disbelieving scoff.

“Do you take the land of the spirits so lightly? Look at the seeds you planted a week ago. They’ve already sprouted leaves and stems. They’ll bear fruit soon enough.”

Crops certainly grow far more quickly here than they ever would in the human world. This was undoubtedly because the spirits’ land was so fertile and bathed constantly in sunlight.

“That’s true. In that case… could you bring me a little more fruit and bread?”

“If I’m going out anyway, I’ll bring tea and cookies as well.”

Elysion turned sharply as he spoke.

Before she had even finished thanking him, he had disappeared from view.

Jaina found herself smiling once more.

As brusque as he was by habit, he was far warmer than he let on.

***

Patrick’s face drained of color as he stared at the document in front of him.

Upon learning that Jaina had fled, Cadel swiftly returned to the North. At dawn the following morning, he arrived at the estate and pushed a parental rights renunciation agreement towards Patrick, demanding his signature.

“A r-renunciation of parental rights…?”

“I will compensate you generously in exchange for relinquishing her guardianship.”

“N-no, what is this supposed to—?”

“It would be wise to sign while I am still willing to settle this amicably.”

Cadel’s voice was as cold as ice.

Patrick’s expression twisted.

No matter how powerful or high-ranking Cadel was, how could he demand so casually that a father give up custody of his daughter?

“Compensate you? That’s absurd! What are you implying? Do I look like the sort of man who would sell his own daughter?”

He had no idea how much Cadel was offering, but he could not simply agree.

The money Jaina earned did not belong entirely to him. Seventy per cent of her earnings had to be handed over to the priest who had registered her as his legitimate daughter.

Nevertheless, skimming a portion of her earnings was far more profitable than giving up his parental rights altogether.

Even after Jaina fled, countless villages continued to seek her divine power.

He had been stalling them, claiming the saintess was unwell. In reality, he had already commissioned the Empire’s most capable investigative agency to track her down. Capturing the runaway girl would only be a matter of time.

Patrick let out a scoffing laugh.

Cadel’s eyes grew colder still.

“If a bloodline test is conducted, you will receive none of my compensation. You will likely find yourself in prison instead.”

The color drained from Patrick’s face in an instant.

‘A bloodline test…? Does he know everything? How could he?!’

The priest at the Grand Sanctuary had assured him that the truth would never come to light.

He made up a story that Jaina was the child born from an affair with a saintess and registered her as part of his household. From that point on, everything went smoothly.

The priest had hidden his true identity and lived quietly as a commoner. Therefore, there should have been no evidence left behind — nothing for anyone to find, even if the Grand Sanctuary had decided to investigate.

‘And yet he’s talking about a bloodline test…’

Patrick stared at Cadel, the color draining from his face.

He had no idea how much the Grand Duke knew. If a bloodline test were conducted, the truth would be exposed — namely, that Jaina was not his daughter — and he would be forced to answer for his crimes.

Under normal circumstances, a saintess blessed by the Elim Tree could not conceive a child. The only way a saintess could become pregnant was through union with an ordinary human who could not wield mana.

If she slept with someone who could wield mana, it would react against her divine power. No matter how many times they came together, conception would never occur. However, with a normal human — someone incapable of influencing divine power — pregnancy would be possible.

‘There are ways to bribe people and replace the bloodline report… but that only works when the Grand Duke doesn’t already know!’

The color drained further from Patrick’s face.

“Choose.”

Cadel’s voice was frost itself.

“Sign this, take the money I offer, and live quietly… or rot in prison for the rest of your life for stealing a saintess from the Grand Sanctuary.”

Under Cadel’s glacial tone, Patrick swallowed, his throat dry and tight.

***

After obtaining Patrick’s signed renunciation of guardianship, Cadel climbed into the carriage. Inside, his aide Adil Zeoenti glanced at the parchment in Cadel’s hand and asked,

“Has it been settled?”

“Yes.”

Cadel sat across from him and handed over the document.

“That saves us some trouble. If I’d known it would end like this, I would have stayed at the ducal castle.”

“He might not have signed so easily.”

“True. That’s why you dragged me here to prepare for the worst… yet he signed without a fight.”

Adil muttered under his breath, unable to hide his frustration. His workload was already overwhelming, yet Cadel had insisted on bringing him all the way here.

He could not fathom why his lord had become so fixated on a mere commoner or why he was pursuing this matter with such relentless determination.

In fact, he could not comprehend how Cadel had met her or how he had ordered such an extensive investigation into her past.

After discovering that the woman was a saintess, however, some of his lord’s behavior began to make sense.

Nevertheless, setting aside a dozen pressing matters to prioritize removing her from a common household still felt utterly bewildering.

‘Of course… a priest of the Grand Sanctuary conspiring with a commoner to steal away a saintess is a serious issue.’

According to the Grand Sanctuary’s rules, any saintess with common blood was deemed ‘impure’, and her child was returned to her parents. They exploited that regulation so cleverly. The world was filled with vicious people.

Adil examined the signed document once more, then tucked it securely into the inner compartment of his already full bag.

“Once we return, deal with it immediately.”

Cadel removed his gloves as he spoke to Adil.

“Yes. You instructed that it be handled as the highest priority. I am well aware.”

Seemingly satisfied with the explanation, Cadel nodded once.

It was a relief to have resolved the most troubling issue first.

If Adil had not accidentally discovered in a previous life that Jaina had been registered as the daughter of a man who was not her biological father, Cadel might never have learned the truth.

Of course, Adil had not returned with his memories intact, unlike Cadel. He wouldn’t remember showing an unusual fondness for Jaina in their previous life, nor harboring an equally strong dislike for her family.

In truth, Jaina had once lived a quiet life at the Grand Sanctuary alongside the other saintesses. However, because her divine power surpassed all of theirs, she had been transformed into the so-called ‘lost daughter’ of that man.

Patrick Ariel was a greedy commoner who would do anything for money. A priest at the Grand Sanctuary, equally blinded by avarice, exploited a rare circumstance that enabled a saintess to be born from a union with a commoner. Jaina was thus falsely registered as Patrick’s daughter.

In exchange for raising her, Patrick agreed to give seventy percent of the profits earned from her divine power to the priest.

“My childhood… was painful. But I could understand why my family did not love me. I was the result of Father’s infidelity. Perhaps he could not treat me kindly because I reminded him of his past wrongdoing.”

That was what Jaina had once said.

As an adult, she claimed to understand why her family were cold towards her. Although she was not at fault, she believed that her existence had hurt them. She was the kind of woman who was too kind for her own good.

The moment he returned to the past, Cadel sought out the priest who had ruined Jaina’s childhood and killed him.

After that, he began making arrangements to return Jaina to the Grand Sanctuary.

And yet—

“She left home secretly. We are searching everywhere for her.”

Her actions were completely different to those in her previous life. It was then that he first had the thought that perhaps, like himself, Jaina had returned with all her memories intact.

Perhaps that was why she had chosen to leave that dreadful house alone. Should he have told her the truth about her father and family in their previous life?

He had kept it from her, not wanting to shock her. Now, that decision felt faintly unsettling.

Nevertheless, the fact that she had walked away from them of her own accord was, in a way, a relief.

‘Now all that remains is to find her.’

Cadel slowly closed his eyes. The hellish day before his return flashed through his mind — the day Jaina had taken her own life.

He remembered the moment he had picked up the black axe — an heirloom passed down through his family for generations — in an attempt to bring her back.

[He who wields the Black Axe shall be cursed.]

At the time, he had not feared the curse.

Living in a world without Jaina — that was the true curse.

‘Perhaps… the curse was returning to the past with all my memories intact.’

When he opened his eyes and realized that Jaina was no longer in the castle, his heart sank.

When he realized that he had travelled back in time, it sank again.

From that moment on, his only focus was finding a way to bring Jaina back to the Grand Duchy. He had yet to discover the real reason she had taken her own life.

“Your Grace… we have arrived in the North. It’s raining.”

Adil spoke carefully and almost regretfully.

Cadel slowly opened his eyes.

He turned his head towards the window.

Indeed, it was raining: a steady, relentless drizzle.

The moment he saw it, the familiar, unbearable tremor began to spread through his body.

‘D*mn it.’

He squeezed his eyes shut, then opened them again and glared at the falling rain.

He had planned to go straight to his study upon arriving at the castle, where he would discuss Jaina’s whereabouts with Adil.

But because of this damned rain, he would be thwarted once more.

The trembling worsened. His heart tightened in his chest. Soon, he knew, he would be unable to think at all.

He ground his teeth.