Chapter 28

All sorts of thoughts swirled in her head. Lorraine lowered her gaze, afraid that meeting his eyes would lead to awkward silence.

But Earl Bedington showed no sign of discomfort. On the contrary, perhaps noticing her tension, he smiled gently and continued,

“I stopped by at the Viscount’s request. He said he left something behind.”

“Oh… I see.”

Lorraine answered briefly, her words growing shorter. Awkwardness and embarrassment tangled inside her, making her careful even with her word choices, lest her feelings slip out.

She wondered how she should react if the Earl brought up anything Ian had told him. The uncomfortable thought made her shoulders tense. The Earl watched her for a moment, then lightly swung one hand behind his back as he spoke.

“If you don’t mind… would you care to take a walk with me?”

Lorraine blinked at the unexpected suggestion.

“A walk…?”

“The garden here isn’t large, but it’s quite nice. It’d be a shame to see it alone. And the weather is good today.”

His tone remained gentle, as if he was deliberately creating a natural opportunity, knowing she was nervous. Lorraine hesitated for a moment, then slowly nodded.

“…Alright.”

The Earl quietly came to her side. 

The two of them walked slowly toward the villa’s garden. The garden’s path was softly colored by the midday sunlight. As Lorraine walked along the stone path, she watched her own footsteps.

Her mind was in turmoil. She tried to remind herself to stay calm, but her heart kept speeding up. This time walking side by side with Earl Bedington felt unfamiliar.

A quiet breeze passed by. The conversation faded, and only the sound of rustling leaves filled the silence between them. Lorraine unconsciously clenched her fingertips. The Earl matched her pace quietly.

“It’s a beautiful garden. I came here at night before, so I never realized how lovely it was.”

“Ian liked this garden since childhood. Whenever something troubled him, he often came here.”

The Earl spoke softly. Ian liked this garden—a place quiet, full of trees, and surrounded by high walls that shielded it from view. Lorraine closed her eyes for a moment. Imagining young Ian softened her tense gaze.

“Did… something happen between you and Ian?”

Suddenly, Lorraine’s steps paused. In that brief silence, her mouth went dry.

“…No. It’s just… I think I made a mistake with the Viscount.”

She tried to smile. But the smile didn’t last. The peaceful garden was in stark contrast to the turmoil inside her.

She had wanted to ask him directly, but Ian had already gone far away. Was her resolve too late?

Lost in thought, Lorraine looked at Earl Bedington walking beside her. He was Ian’s longtime friend. She doubted he’d lie about Ian.

Lorraine hesitated briefly, then summoned her courage to ask the Earl,

“What kind of person was Viscount Ian Lindsay?”

It was a question she could finally bring herself to ask. Saying it felt like setting down a heavy burden she’d carried for a long time.

Lorraine found it strange that she was now trying to look so deeply into her relationship with Ian. When had she ever wanted to know someone this much? But now that she’d decided not to avoid it, she resolved not to ignore her curiosity any longer.

Earl Bedington smiled as Lorraine asked about Ian.

“Ian is not someone who easily shows his true self.”

The Earl stopped walking and nodded slowly.

“The Ian I know probably isn’t much different from the one you know. Kind, gentle, always smiling. And above all…”

The Earl paused, then slowly turned his head toward Lorraine and smiled as he continued,

“He seems to care for you very much.”

Lorraine stopped in her tracks. That unexpected statement dropped into her chest like a stone, tightening her heart. It sounded so natural that it felt undeniably real.

The Earl looked at Lorraine, then gave a short laugh and tilted his head with a playful smile.

“Everyone who knows Ian knows how much he cared for you, Lady Summers. So, even if there’s a small misunderstanding between you two, if you talk honestly, it’ll be easily resolved.”

She had dismissed his sincere gestures as something he did for everyone, believing the rumors. No, she hadn’t been unaware—she just refused to believe it.

‘Why didn’t I know?’

All the kindness Ian had shown her flashed through her mind. If all those things stemmed from feelings deeper than she’d thought? What if the warmth Ian gave her was something he’d never given anyone else? Lorraine pressed her lips together.

The Earl watched Lorraine’s expression, then smiled playfully and teased,

“By the way, Lady Summers, is it difficult for you?”

“…Pardon?”

Lorraine looked at the Earl, not understanding his meaning.

“Ian is a man of strong convictions. He always was, even as a child. Maybe it’s because he grew up in a rather conservative family… So, women who approached Ian were often disappointed.”

The Earl gave a meaningful smile and continued,

“In these times, when free love is fashionable in the capital, dating an old-fashioned believer in premarital chastity isn’t easy, is it?”

At that moment, Lorraine’s thoughts froze.

“…What?”

The Earl’s voice was light, almost joking, but Lorraine’s mind was in chaos. Had she heard wrong? Ian… a believer in chastity before marriage… Was he a v*rgin?

Ian was her first, and Lorraine was Ian’s first as well. The words he’d whispered softly came back to her.

“You are my first.”

She had thought it was just possessiveness over a s*xual partner, but it wasn’t simply an emotional statement. Ian truly meant that everything with her was his first.

Lorraine felt breathless. She had thought he felt responsible for taking her first, but in reality, she was the one who had taken his. Her heart began to pound.

The Earl tilted his head as he looked at Lorraine.

“Did you not know?”

She hadn’t. Not for a single moment had she doubted it. Now she realized Ian’s confession was not just out of responsibility.

Ian was not the promiscuous womanizer she had imagined. Every kind word, every shared breath, none of it was a lie. Through the Earl’s words, Lorraine understood that all those moments did not come from fleeting desire.

Now, the reason Ian had cried became clear. Lorraine realized how deeply she had misunderstood him and how much she had hurt him. Her chest felt heavy.

Then what had she said to Ian? Lorraine felt disgusted with herself. When Ian confessed, instead of responding with honesty, she had only said things that would wound him.

‘When I didn’t know anything about him.’

Suddenly, Lorraine remembered the day she had spoken with Ian at the bookstore about rumors. That day, Ian had said to her,

“People judge and believe others easily by impressions and hearsay. Unless you experience it yourself, you can never know the truth.”

It was herself who had failed to see Ian properly, swept up by rumors.

The mansion’s front gate came into view again. Realizing they had walked a full circle made Lorraine’s heart sting. It was a simple walk, but to her, it felt like retracing Ian’s footsteps.

By now, sunlight was turning the edges of the leaves yellow. Even the way the vines hung gently over the wall reminded Lorraine of Ian’s back as he left.

“We’ve already walked the whole way around.”

The Earl stopped as he spoke. His tone was still full of gentle consideration.

“Lady Summers, when you want to apologize to someone, only sincerity matters. And it’s never too late to realize the truth. Don’t forget that.”

“Thank you… truly, Earl.”

As Lorraine finished speaking, she realized her fingertips were trembling slightly. She brought her hands together and placed them quietly over her chest. Complex feelings swept over her.

She had walked in Ian’s footsteps and heard stories from his friend. She’d looked back a little late, but being late didn’t mean it was all over. Thinking this, Lorraine quietly bit her lip. The faint resolve that had been growing inside her was finally taking shape.