Chapter 3

Marlin called out to her with a face full of surprise and joy.

Heila slowly raised her body and leaned against the headboard.

“Are you feeling a little better?”

Her head throbbed as if it were about to split.

Heila turned her head and looked at Marlin.

The surroundings were dark, but by the moonlight and the candlelight, she could make out the other’s face.

“Marlin?”

“Yes, it’s me. I’ll call the doctor right away, so please wait just a moment.”

Marlin spoke with a moved expression as she tried to stand.

Heila grabbed her wrist and asked,

“Kersian? Where is Kersian?”

The room was quiet, and aside from the nurse who had been unjustly killed years ago, there was no one to be seen.

Yet it felt as though Kersian might open the closed door and walk in at any moment.

Even amidst the pounding headache, the thought of facing him was far more terrifying and dreadful, making her heart race wildly.

‘My heart is beating…? Why am I alive?’

‘Or is this just a nightmare before death?’

But if that were the case, she could vividly feel her heart pounding and blood coursing through her body.

And more than anything, the nurse looking at her with a troubled expression felt far too real.

Unaware of those thoughts, Marlin’s heart ached at the sight of Heila searching for him the moment she woke up.

“As it happens, His Grace came by earlier today. He asked about your condition and was worried.”

At those words, Heila did not respond.

Because her head was lowered, her expression could not be seen.

“Shall I call him here now if you wish to see him?”

“There’s no need.”

Heila’s voice trembled.

With a soft pattering sound, droplets fell onto the blanket spread over the sheets.

Marlin didn’t know what to say to comfort her.

“What on earth happened?”

Heila asked.

She couldn’t understand it at all.

Could it be that she hadn’t died, but had gone mad and was seeing illusions?

It made no sense for someone who had died to be standing before her.

And even in death, not being able to escape from Kersian or Uriel—wasn’t that far too cruel?

Had she gone insane from suffering and become trapped in the most horrifying moment of her life?

Otherwise, how could it be that after her body had clearly been shattered and she died, the first thing she saw upon opening her eyes was the scene of her wedding day?

“Ha…”

Heila let out a quiet, hollow laugh.

No matter how she thought about it, none of it made sense.

“The doctor said it seems to be from the shock. There’s nothing physically wrong with you. That’s what he said, but you couldn’t regain consciousness for over two days.”

Heila remained silent, her head lowered.

A scream rose from within her, and an urge to destroy everything in sight surged up.

She wanted to smash everything in the room and throw herself down once more before Kersian could appear before her.

This time, so she could die for certain.

But seeing Marlin’s eyes, already reddened as if she had cried so much, she couldn’t do anything.

Since childhood, even the smallest scratch on Heila would make her worry as if she herself were in far greater pain.

She had followed her here, suffered because of her, and even until the moment of her death, she had only ever thought of her.

In front of someone like that, she couldn’t bring herself to do it.

All that remained was resignation.

“You have no idea how worried everyone was.”

“Everyone?”

“Yes. Me, Sir Heinrich, His Grace, and the others as well.”

“There’s no need to lie.”

Heila’s voice was extremely cold.

Beyond resignation, there was even a trace of anger.

Marlin bit her lip.

At that moment, Heila suddenly rose from her seat.

Startled, Marlin asked,

“Your Grace, where are you going?”

“I’m not going anywhere. I just want to look around.”

Heila glanced around the room, then stepped out onto the terrace.

The cold night air made her body instinctively shrink.

She approached the railing and looked down.

A familiar view came into sight.

In that instant, the moment she had thrown herself down flashed through her mind.

At the same time, a sharp pain surged through her chest, and Heila collapsed to the ground.

Startled, Marlin rushed over and checked on her condition.

Heila said she was fine and, with Marlin’s support, went back inside.

As she was about to lie down again, a large portrait hanging on the wall caught her eye.

It was of herself in a white ceremonial dress, and Kersian beside her, also dressed in wedding attire.

“Why is that hanging on the wall? It’s unpleasant to look at—get rid of it immediately. No, burn it entirely.”

Fixing her gaze on the portrait, Heila clenched her fists.

Her wide-open eyes were bloodshot red.

“Her Grace, please calm down. I understand how you feel, but if you really do that, people will start talking.”

“It doesn’t matter.”

Heila spoke while keeping her eyes on the woman in the portrait.

The pure white wedding dress, like freshly fallen snow, was exquisitely detailed and luxurious.

However, the bride’s expression did not look particularly bright.

Looking at the portrait, memories from long ago—ones she had forgotten—came flooding back.

On her wedding day, she had entered the hall with a heart full of excitement, only to discover a woman seated confidently among the guests, wearing a dress as white as snow.

Even as the bride made her entrance, it seemed the people’s attention was more focused on her.

The knights of the ducal house had tried to escort the woman out with utmost politeness, but she did not budge, and they hesitated, unable to lay a hand on her.

Aware of the countless gazes filling the hall, Heila forced herself to remain composed as she asked, and Kersian introduced her in a calm voice.

“She is the daughter of Count Chaos. Her name is Uriel.”

“If she’s from the Count Chaos family, then she’s from a vassal house of the duchy. Why is the daughter of a vassal family being allowed to ruin the ceremony like this?”

“She has a rather mischievous personality and seems to be playing a prank. The ceremony hasn’t been ruined to that extent. I’ll scold her later, so I hope you won’t take it too seriously.”

“A prank?”

To her, who stood there in shock, he added without a care,

“Uriel and the Count’s family are like family to me, so I hope you’ll get along with her as well.”

Heila closed her eyes, then opened them again.

Her anticipation and excitement turned into humiliation, and instead of gazes filled with admiration, she finished the ceremony under looks of ridicule and pity.

That day had been a deep wound, but compared to everything she had endured before her death, it had only been the beginning.

Unlike before, when things had concluded without incident, this time the ceremony ended in chaos because she had collapsed.

Before losing consciousness, she remembered the way Kersian had looked at her with disgust.

He, who valued honor and pride so greatly, must have been furious that the ceremony had been ruined.

Because the timing of her collapse had been strange, people must have whispered, and having to deal with the aftermath would make it even more unpleasant for him.

Since Kersian would never direct his anger toward the Uriel he loved, that anger would inevitably be turned toward her.

Just thinking about facing him again made it hard for her to breathe.

“I think it would be best to call a doctor.”

Marlin was filled with nothing but anxiety.

She was about to ring the bell on the table to call someone, but Heila stopped her, leaving her stamping her feet in frustration.

“Your Grace, what’s wrong?”

“I’m fine, so there’s no need for a doctor or anything. Just stay by my side while I think.”

The Heila who was usually gentle and innocent now seemed like a completely different person.

Despite her cold voice, her expression looked like thin ice that could shatter at any moment.

Recalling the doctor’s words that there was nothing physically wrong, Marlin had no choice but to nod.

“Yes. I will.”

After hearing her response, Heila sat down on the bed.

“My father?”

“He should still be at the imperial palace.”

“As long as he’s still alive, that’s enough.”

“…Pardon?”

“It’s nothing.”

With that, Heila said no more.

Her gaze sank into a vacant expression.

The moment she had thrown herself down and the memories of her wedding day kept resurfacing in her mind.

She had jumped from a great height, yet when she opened her eyes, she had returned to the day she was marrying Kersian.

At first, she thought it was a mistake, but it wasn’t.

It felt like she had died, yet not quite, like she had experienced a long, vivid dream.

It was difficult to distinguish what was a dream and what was reality.

Heila lowered her gaze.

In the fireplace, firewood crackled as it burned, radiating warmth.

Inside, there was a faint scent of medicine, and through the open window, the night air carried the fragrance of spring.

Every sensation felt overwhelmingly real.

There was no such thing as a dream like this.

Perhaps this was punishment for leading so many people to their deaths.

Because the reality before her was no different from hell.

The wedding that had been the beginning of all her misfortune—now that it had already taken place, she was bound to the ducal house.

It was all repeating from the very start.

If the heavens had pitied her, she would have been sent back to before she met him.

‘Isn’t it because you’re being so pathetic that those two can act so boldly?’

‘Do you think I haven’t tried? Don’t speak so easily.’

‘So are you planning to keep living like this?’

‘Sometimes, no matter how hard you try, things just don’t work out. Maybe this is simply my fate.’

‘Fate is something people create.’

Suddenly, she recalled a conversation she had once had with someone at her father’s funeral.

Back then, she had hated that person for speaking such hurtful words so casually.

She had thought that, because he was born privileged—arrogant and used to getting his way—he couldn’t possibly understand her, which was why he could speak so lightly.

Perhaps, with her heart twisted as it was, she had only felt wronged hearing those words.

But now, they sounded different.

“Fate is something people create?”

Heila murmured blankly.

For the first time, a faint smile appeared on her lips.