“You, open the door.”

“Pardon?”

“I said open it!”

At my attitude of blatantly ignoring the priest, the soldier looked back and forth between me and the princess with a restless face. But I had reached my limit too.

“Do you want to lose a hand here?”

“N-no!”

I was serious. If he’d delayed even a little longer, I might have personally drawn the sword of the knight following behind. Frightened by the murderous intent, the gatekeeper finally followed the order in a flustered manner.

“H-Her Grace the Grand Duchess, Resetti Alkeidos Job, is entering!”

The gatekeeper soldier who hastily threw open the doors announced my entry with a trembling voice. Dozens of pairs of eyes stuck densely to the open door. The noisy clamor of the banquet hall subsided in an instant, followed by a chilling silence.

“What……! What are you doing? Announce me too right now!”

And the gazes passed over me, reaching even the princess’s party who hadn’t been announced yet. The princess, who belatedly caught on to the situation, widened her eyes with a reddened face.

I forcibly held down my twitching lips and entered the banquet hall, letting the following long and useless recitation of names flow in one ear and out the other. The concentrated gazes moved very slowly following me.

Predators.

Sometimes I think such thoughts. That this is a splendid altar, and we are the sacrifices. Their heads face toward me and their gazes are fixed on the ground, but I know they are always watching us with invisible eyes and ears and tongues and fingertips.

Like love and hate, loyalty and betrayal are also separated by only a hair’s breadth. The past me knew the latter but not the former. But now I knew everything, so there was nothing to fear.

And Odil. My beautiful sacrifice!

“Everyone’s gathered.”

You entered the banquet hall not long after the princess entered fuming. You today, with your jet-black hair completely swept back to reveal your face, were captivatingly mesmerizing. I savored your thick eyebrows below your straight forehead, your sharp eyes beneath them, your smooth nose bridge, and your well-shaped lips one by one.

They were like the crystallization of my aesthetic desires, so I always both welcomed and hated the envious gazes pouring toward you. Women holding your hand with flushed faces. Nobles desperate to offer their daughters! I’d imagined gouging out their eyes and cutting out their tongues more than once or twice.

“Welcome to the duchy, Princess.”

You grasped the princess’s white hand with your large hand where veins stood out. The princess’s heated gaze tenaciously chased you like that.

“I thank you for the hospitality, Your Highness.”

I still clearly remember the countless praises that spoke of the scandal between you and the princess in the past. The love of the century. Love at first sight. Then wouldn’t now be exactly that time? Thinking that, mischief suddenly welled up. I swatted away the princess’s shyly extended hand and stole her place.

“I hear you’re unwell? Please don’t think of anything else and just rest comfortably.”

Your lips that had been about to touch the back of her hand couldn’t slow down in time and grazed my skin for a moment. Ah! Rough yet soft. That trace holding moist heat was like a brand left on the skin.

“……I will keep that in mind, Your Grace.”

The princess’s eyes looking at me at the failed attempt blazed as brightly as her bright red hair color. Dozens of pairs of eyes filling the banquet hall stood on end like a viper’s scales, sharply scanning us like that. They were hanging the princess and me on level scales, weighing our immediate usefulness.

“Your Grace.”

And Marquis Gladi was the heaviest weight on that scale and the most fervent pro-Gorgon faction member. He was also the person who opposed our marriage more strongly than anyone.

“I too am grateful for Your Grace’s generosity. I was concerned that baseless rumors might make you uncomfortable, but with such hospitality, the King of Gorgon will surely be pleased.”

He approached soundlessly. He bent his slender body and paid his respects to you like it was the natural thing to do. However, I clearly saw his black eyes glittering with the joy of victory as he mentioned the rumors.

It couldn’t be helped. In truth, he had already arranged the marriage between the King of Gorgon’s cousin and his second son several years ago. He had made his move early, knowing their ambition to devour this land.

My beautiful homeland!

Those who covet this land are everywhere. Only the Holy Kingdom pretends otherwise with dignity, but even that is merely covering the sky with one’s palm.

The Holy Kingdom, which claims to be god’s representative, exercises tremendously powerful influence over nearly half the continent. Not through force but through justification, they grant legitimacy to crowns and in return are promised wealth and protection. Of course, that legitimacy is proportional to worldly gold and the strength of national power, and under their proclamation, sometimes certain invasions and usurpations become holy wars.

And us.

Starting from a small city, we barely became a duchy by fending off countless invasion attempts. Now we desire a royal title, and the Pope demands worldly gold and greater honor, but unfortunately our coffers are not that abundant.

Gorgon aimed precisely at that gap. For us to gladly receive their help and be granted a royal title. And thus function as a vassal state in all but name.

That was also Marquis Gladi’s wish.

Since being pushed out in a power struggle with the first Grand Duke, they had bowed their heads as subjects while always dreaming of reclaiming the grand ducal position. If the princess’s child ascended to the next succession as he wished, Marquis Gladi would finally become a power equal to you.

And they had already achieved that wish once before.

“Well. Whether the rumors are baseless or not, we’ll have to wait and see.”

“Haha…… Is that so.”

What a cunning old man. I clicked my tongue and turned around. Even in the midst of that, his slightly stiffened expression was quite satisfying. Wasn’t this enough pretense? I was about to leave, no longer wanting to endure this space.

“More than that, Your Highness. I have something to say regarding the princess’s residence…… Could you possibly provide the Giverny estate? There’s been a problem with the originally prepared lodging, and at this rate it seems difficult to accommodate our guest.”

I hesitated as I was turning around. The princess’s residence was a challenge I had never once considered. Since the princess in the past stayed in the guest lodging, I rashly assumed it would be the same this time. It was my mistake to completely overlook that Arthur was no longer here.

But now, provide what?

“Is there some problem?”

Ah. Did I say that out loud? I don’t know. But even if I had known, there were no words I could say. Isn’t that right?

Where we first confirmed each other’s hearts, wandered the rose garden together whispering love, and where I accepted your secret proposal. And where I eventually conceived my beloved Arthur! How could I possibly make you understand now that that place was the Giverny estate?

“It seems there isn’t. Then I’ll take it as agreement.”

Even the gently flowing music stopped, and the hall was as quiet as dawn. The banquet hall’s lights, the gathered people. All of it mixed together and became murkily distorted. My mind became distant like the misty fog swept away hazily just before dawn.

I admit it. This was my defeat. So clear it was perfect to the point of being impossible to deny.

Everyone in this place knew it. I also knew that everyone knew it. Like forcibly pressing down the lid of a boiling kettle, the low-quality exclamations barely suppressed hovered hazily above like steam. My teeth ground together.

Yes, it must be amusing. You must feel like you could die of interest. One of the two women competing over the young Grand Duke had fallen miserably!

I was miserable. I was anxious. While the unchanged reality was frustrating, I felt like I could die from hating you for standing by and watching me like this. Yes, I hated you. You who remained beautiful and strong with nothing changed. You who took my entire heart and shoved it straight into the mud.

“Thank you for providing such a precious residence, Your Highness. And…… to Your Grace as well.”

Ironically, it was none other than the princess who pulled me from the wave of emotions. The smile fully spread across her face snapped me to attention like being struck by lightning.

“No, it’s fine. I hope you stay comfortably.”

I squeezed out all my remaining patience and somehow strung words together. However, I felt like I absolutely couldn’t stay here any longer. If I did, even I couldn’t guarantee what I might do.

I straightened my back and slowly crossed the spacious banquet hall. You didn’t stop me.

Thud.

The jaws of the heavy iron door interlocked behind me and the unsettling silence was finally cut off cleanly. However, I didn’t want to return to my room right away, so I wandered aimlessly around various parts of the castle. The gloomy night garden. The vegetation soaked in darkness let out low screams in the brushing wind.

I listened to that sound for a while. Until the remaining excitement completely subsided. Until the boiling hatred gradually calmed and reduced in size.

But it never completely disappears. It simply waits for its time, remaining in my empty chest like a false heart.

My Odil.

I am a flame that burns life using that anger as firewood. The curious and lively girl of old days melted entirely in the flames of grief and hatred and was buried in a new casting. And what always raises me up again is always you, no one else.

Whenever I recall you and the princess, and the child who is no more. And whenever I trace our old memories of sharing love in the rose garden, I’m in pain like my chest is being torn open with a spear. As much as I loved you, I can’t bear how resentful I am of you.

But why is it? I made only one wish. It was a target that absolutely couldn’t miss.

My Odil. Why don’t you look unhappy at all?